Do you believe in couples that live together and never marry?

Question

I have been dating a great guy for about 7 months now and we have discussed the issue of marriage. He has the idea that due to all his other friends having misserable marriages that he just does not want to go down that road. He tells me he is in our relationship for the "long haul" and could not see himself with any other woman. We are both 34 and I have already been married twice before. I can understand his view point having already been there done that, but I am not sure that I could live with someone and share my life and never marry them. I have a child from the last marriage and I am not sure how I would explain this living situation to her once she is old enough. We have a very healthy and happy relationship now and see us that way in the future. What are you opinions to couples sharing their lives together and never taking "the plunge".

Answer 1

I think that if you are "truly" happy with the man your with then marriage really doesn't make a difference one way or another...I'm 36 yrs. old and have been married once but what I am seeking now is a MAN....someone that loves me, treats me with respect and my son with respect...someone who is honest and caring....don't let a good guy slip by just because you ultimately want a "piece of paper" ...do you know how badly I have been searching for what you have right now (if your being honest in saying that you have a happy/healthy relationship) soo many women out there are seeking that and sometimes NEVER find it.....if a person wants to cheat then they will do so whether or not they are married or living together, it doesn't matter, I see it and hear about it every day....there is an abundance of married couples where one or the other is cheating....don't fool yourself by telling yourself that just because your "married" that he wouldn't dare do it...that's a false assumption that women tend to tell themselves to make themselves feel better...I went through it with my ex and I've learned a valuable lesson from the experience....you can't always trust people, sometimes they hurt you terribly, whether your married or not......I'm not telling you what to do but look at the big picture and think about what you really want here...if it's just to say that your married, had the white wedding, honeymoon, then by all means give your man an ultimatum.....if you want true love then think about what that word really means and hold on tight to that person who means so very much to you, don't let a day go by that you don't tell him that you love and appreciate him....you never know how limited your time is here....make the most of it and realize what's truly important!
Good Luck!

Answer 2

I believe in living together before you get married for a little bit, but never get married? I understand both of you have been there and done that, but I do think that eventually you will want to settle down again and if he isn't willing to you will probably not be able to get over it very easily. Maybe talk to him about it again and try to get to him to be a little more opened minded about it in the future at least, let him know that even though you understand how he feels to still keep the option of getting married open.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

Statics have proven when couple live together before marriage, they will more than likely divorce. I lived with my BF , who was a heavy drinker, Gambler. We loved each other and had a very sexy , faithful committed relationship. I could not tolerate his lifestyle, he nor I ever cheated in 3 yrs, we had a very intimate,sexy relationship, I moved out and broke up with him. For over 12 yrs he contacted me , we both married someone else, he moved back to where I lived, we got married and was married for 13 yrs until he died from cancer from smoking cigarettes. He was Capricorn, I am Cancer. I fall in love with Capricorn men, my weakness.

Answer 4

If you believe in marriage, then don't let that value go. Never compromise your beliefs for another person. To each is own, living together and never marrying may be the way for some, but if you want to be married, then you should be. If he loves you then he would compromise with you. If he truly loves you, then nothing should stand in his way of marrying you. You have just as much at stake as he does.

Answer 5

You've taken the plunge twice and from the sound of it, it hasn't been so peachy. Why do you want to try for a third time? Why not just live with him and skip the divorce proceedings if you do break up?

Answer 6

i know of a few people who have decided that marriage isn't for them. they prefer to have a life partner, who they're loyal to, but aren't married to. i think the biggest issue you're facing is that if you're not married, then how can you trust that he'll stay with you? it's a trust issue. otherwise, you really wouldn't mind that you guys didn't marry. or maybe you've always dreamed of that perfect wedding and this doesn't quite fit what you've always wanted. talk to your partner about your feelings instead of asking strangers online. communication will help lots.

Answer 7

I have lived with a boyfriend before and when you break up you both lose out on alot. I would never to it again. I would not live with another man unless it was my husband.

Answer 8

I have been with my now husband for 9 years. We just got married in January. No regrets here. If it isn't broke, don't fix it.

Answer 9

depends on the situation. my mom cheated on my dad and when they got divorced, this guy moved in to my house. my brother and i refuse to let her marry him. they have a good relationship without marriage.

Answer 10

i've seen it happen i ha d friend her mom and dad was together over 20yrs and never got married