My mother-in-law and I didn't exactly get along well. My mother-in-law is old and sick, and gets very annoying. She has done and said things that have made me cry. Should I tell my fiance that I don't like his mother or should be quite about it. I need advice on how to deal with mother-in-laws and how to keep my fiance happy. Naturally he cares about his mother.
2006-08-22 04:29:31 · 17 answers · asked by homelovegiver 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I would stay far far away from her and not say anything to him........
2006-08-22 04:37:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Try to be polite to his mother. If it becomes that big of a problem with her treating you badly then there are other solutions. Explain to you fiancee how she makes you feel. Tell him that you would rather not go with him to visit her. However, make sure that he knows you are not trying to come between his relationship with his mother. I had to do this and it was for the better. He still spoke to his mother and went to visit. I just didn't go along. When she would call the house I would be polite yet brief on the telephone. It actually worked out for me as well as my fiance. He no longer felt torn between the two of us. He didn't appreciate her attitude toward me any more than I did. However, it was a relief to him not to be put in the middle of the gun fire. Good luck to you.
2006-08-22 11:40:49 · answer #2 · answered by geni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Crap. My ex-mother in law was horrible. I am very sorry for you. But you said she's old and sick, so maybe she'll die soon. But I would keep my mouth shut about it, because you will probably NEVER win this battle. Of course, if she does something really really nasty, then you'd want to tell your fiance. But if she's just a beeatch, then you are stuck. Can you avoid visiting her as much as possible? All I can say is you catch more flies with honey, so try to deal with her for your fiance's sake; it's not his fault that he has a wretched mother.
2006-08-22 11:39:05 · answer #3 · answered by danika1066 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Perhaps you should try to build a relationship with her, rather than just writing her off. Take a look at things from her perspective and try to realize why she acts like she does - she may be jealous of the time her son spends with you, or she may just be unhappy, or any number of other things. You also may have misinterpreted what she said to you that upset you. Maybe sit down and talk with her, or even bring her something she likes as a treat.
Try to be compassionate - it'll make your life easier to have a better relationship with her, and it will also help your fiance. And it's worth at least giving a shot. It may take a while, but if you honestly try to work with her and be kind, it should pay off in her being nicer to you.
Good luck!
2006-08-22 11:53:24 · answer #4 · answered by Synique 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just broach the subject side ways. Just metion to ur fiance that you would like to know what his mother like and and what her favortie food is because she doesnt seem to like you and you would really love to win her over before you guys got married. Then he will want to know why u dont think she likes you and u tell him what she has been doing to you. If he acts upset with u for any reason whatso ever then you need to make sure you stand up to him and tell him that you will not tolerate his mother treating this way.
2006-08-22 11:39:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a rule out the that you are not suppose to get a long with your mother-in-law. It is just the way it works. No one is good enough for their children. The best advice I can give is just to suck it up and deal with it the best you can. Try taking her to the side and having a heart to heart. Tell her how she makes you feel with out hurting her feelings.
2006-08-22 11:41:15 · answer #6 · answered by dragonfiy81 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell your husband that his mother upsets you but DO NOT tell him you do not like her. That will probably hurt him even more. By telling him that you don't appreciate how she talks to you then he may be able to help you by talking to his mother about her treatment of you. I've been there too, you will survive as long as your fiance supports you.
2006-08-22 11:38:55 · answer #7 · answered by Lov'n IT! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the worst thing you can do is to tell your bf that you cannot stand her..
you have to be as fake as you could with her cause mothers in law are witches!!! hahah
i had a few on my own and the best i could do was act like i didnt even hear what she was saying but act like i love her in front of my bf
it works!
hehe
good luck
2006-08-22 11:38:20 · answer #8 · answered by miliscal123 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well i am married and I know that mother-in-laws are no picnic and I think that you should let him know that she has made you very upset but dont tell him that you dont like his mother because it will get better!
2006-08-22 11:40:21 · answer #9 · answered by melanie b 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
baby girl, it sounds like a thin line that you need to walk. there is nothing wrong by telling your fiance about you not feeling comfortable around her. there is nothing wrong for not see his mom too often. only if he asks what happened, then you can tell him. but don't tattle.
2006-08-22 11:42:00 · answer #10 · answered by harmony 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't fret, she is miserable because she is sick. I work with the elderly, and they have a hard time finding happiness, they know the end is near.
Hang in there, don't upset your man, it is his mom, ya know?
2006-08-22 11:38:18 · answer #11 · answered by shewolf 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋