if someone doesnt get jealous ,does it mean they dont care?

Question

i was with my bf on sunday and i was kind of tipsey and i was texting my friend and when he would text back , i would pull the phone from my bfs hand really fast . not realizing that did look pretty shady .and he never said anything and then he was almost going to yesturday but didnt , and then he tells me today but is like well if your hiding things its none of my business . and i was like so in other words , i guess you dont care what i do, and he says well i been hurt too many times. and then a minute later he says he was mad at me . so does that mean he doesnt really care, or does it mean he is gonna have the mentality to just do what he wants now, i feel like we really need to talk

to everyone who thinks i was texting some other guy, the person i was texting has a been just a friend of mine for 5 years, i wasnt doing anything in the wrong behind his back, it just hurt my feelings that he didnt even ask me about it

Answer 1

Jealousy is a worthless emotion. It is an emotion that is derived from distrust. If you are truly in a situation where you trust your spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend and they trust you then Jealousy doesn't come about. It's only when one person doesn't trust the other that jealousy creeps in and makes everything worse.

If you feel bad about the fact your boyfriend didn't show jealosy, then you need to evaluate why it is important for you to envoke that emotion in him. Trying to make someone jealous is essentially pushing the limits of their trust beyound a point where that trust breaks. Why would anyone want to do that.

If you truly care for your BF the stop with the concern about jealousy and stop with efforts to test the boundries of trust and be happy that you have found someone who trust you.

Hope this helps and good luck!

Answer 2

He lack of jealousy doesn't mean he doesn't care; it means he's a gentleman and will let you make your own decisions. He doesn't want to hold onto you if you don't want him. He wants the attraction to be mutual.

I think he cares, but he has been hurt before and doesn't want to be hurt again. He doesn't own you, and he isn't possessive. You don't want a possessive bf, believe me. It may make you feel secure at first, but it turns very, very sour.

I think he is just letting you make up your mind. If you like this other guy more, or don't like your bf enough to postpone texting your other friend, well, he'll let you make your own decision.

I think he's hurt by your actions, which told him you prefer your text friend, but he's not sure. Yes, he might be mad--and, frankly, I think he has reason to be--but he's not yelling at you, blaming you, or giving you an ultimatum. He's a real gem.

Now I'm going to say something harsh: for his sake, make up your mind. You're toying with him. You might not mean to be, but you are being totally thoughtless of his feelings. And don't pretend to choose him over textie. If you run around behind his back, he will eventually find out and will be really hurt.

Who is textie? Is he another bf? Make up your mind, or be totally honest with bf--if you want two bf's, make sure he knows, so he won't feel betrayed.

The problem in this situation is not your bf; it's you. I don't mean to be harsh; I am trying to wake you up. Look at it from his point of view.

Answer 3

There is no room for Jealousy in a realtionship! Maturity is what needs to be. When a person has been hurt they tend to build a wall so that it doesn't hurt as bad next time maybe he is capable of unconditional love and is willing to share you in order to keep you. Do you have unconditional love for him? and why are you texting other men to bgin with? This is a game you are playing with him that is unfair and curl! You have no right to feel anyway and question how he feels about you when you are doing bull like this to him, how would you feel if he were doing that to you? Drinking ruins realtionships and if you can't handle your tipsiness then cut back! Don't hurt people you are about on purpose or just b/c you are drunk when you love someone you love them always even when tipsy. Eventually he will dump you for this if you keep it up and maybe he is already looking for others whom will not treat him like this or play head games... He is hidding his felings and controlling his actions while studing you!

Answer 4

It doesn't mean he doesn't care it means he care for himself enough to not allow what you do effect him as a result that he has been hurt too many times so he feels what you are doing is the norm.

He sees you as part of the pattern of hurt he has experienced in his life because he see you are communicating with another male and his other hurt might have been from his girlfriends being involved with other guys.

If you care and what to show him you do, I suggest you be a little more careful about exposing him to your phone calls and text messages from other guys.

Your questioning if he cares about you but you should question whether you truly care about him if you need to communicate with another guy. Good Luck.

Answer 5

I don't think not being jealous means you don't care. Maybe he isn't a jealous person. The way I feel about it is, if someone is going to cheat on me, me being jealous isn't going to stop that. In fact, it may push them away.

I think that I would want to know about it if someone were lying to me or cheating. Show him the text messages so he knows you have nothing to hide. Don't read into the lack of jealousy too much. Maybe he just trusts you and realizes that if you wanted to cheat you could.Good luck.

Answer 6

Jealousy is one emotion that can make or break a relationship, in your case it could break yours. Do you do this to play headgames? You know if he says he has been hurt so many times before, then wake up and smell the coffee!!! He is telling you in an indirect manner, that hey why should I expect anything different from you. Cook him a nice meal, sit down and TALK!!!!!

Answer 7

There is only one way to tell if he is really concerned about you in a relationship and that is to start socially dating other guys. The second issue in this question is why is he saying "I love you, I want you and I need you" when he does not want you all to himself? These are serious relationship words and should not be abused in the way he is abusing them. The likely answer is he just wants to get into your panties but he does not want to have a long term, intimate relationship with you because he may feel that you would expect more of him than he is willing to give you at this time. He does not want you to be his "girlfriend", just a booty call. You are justified in not believing him.

Answer 8

I'd say if he's been hurt so many times, it has became what he's used to, and he realizes that nothing he does is going to make it better. Girls have a way of just driving a guy mentally insane when they do crap like that.

Answer 9

You guys do need to talk. Someone not being jealous doesn't mean they don't care, it means they trust you. Stop trying to make him jealous before you ruin your relationship. Most people don't like to play those kinds of games.

Answer 10

I am not a jealous person, I personally hate jealousy and won't deal with it....Jealousy usually means insecurity, and that can cause alot of problems... he sounds very mature and secure to me, so you should be glad and give him the same respect....