What is the best piece of 'sledging' you've ever heard?

Question

not that you've heard the pro's say...

something you may have heard yourself in village/club cricket.

Answer 1

I captain a midweek side and we had this sixteen join us and his first game for us was a nasty tempered local derby. this bloke at short leg was telling the kid all of the things he'd done to his mum, etc, and i just kept telling him to keep his head.

next ball was short and jamie pulled it straight into short legs chest. the short leg hit the floor in pain and jamie took a step out of his crease to tap the wicket down and i caught him saying to short leg from under the helmet - "didn't shag that did you, fatboy!"

short leg kept very quite for the rest of the game.

and we beat the bastards!!!

Answer 2

For me, the main suited piano piece i understand is the 2nd circulation (Adagio) from Mozart's Piano Concerto no. 23 in A, ok 488. that's the main achingly beautiful element i've got ever heard. I performed bassoon in a overall performance of this concerto and that i began bawling my eyes out interior the gown prepare consultation - try enjoying a wind tool once you're like that :o} Cheers, Hafwen

Answer 3

Steve Waugh to Gibbs in 1999 semi final after gibbs dropped Waugh in slips (early in his innings)-

Waugh-You just dropped the world cup..

And if you guys are wondering the indian guys' posts are fake..Sachin never scored 18 runs off mushtaq

Mushtaq and Abdul Qadir never played in a match against India Where tendulkar was also playing..
(they played three one dayer against india with both of them in the team,a nehru cup match and 2 matches in sharjah but sachin was not in the team in those 3 matches)
and sachin was a disaster in his first sries against Pakistan(the series which was abdul qadir's last and sachin's first)

And that banglore incident was..vekantesh said something highly offensive to Sohail,in the next ball he lost his temper and tried to slog him losing his wicket,it is commons ense how can someone be out bowled on a bouncer which he misses?

Answer 4

I do not think any piece of sledging is good.

Most of the examples you are being given consist of disgusting sexual innuendo. As your question implies, they are spreading from professional cricket to village and club matches. Boys play in these and they should not be subject to such filth.

It is time the laws of cricket were changed to allow players to be sent off for ungentlemanly conduct for "sledging". The place of cricket is not so secure that it can afford the bad image "sledging" gives the game.

Answer 5

Aussie against a provincial team in South Africa.The portly batsman,Kosie Venter,wouldn't come out of his crease.
Ian Healey shouts 'Hey Glenn,put a Mars Bar at the end of the crease and maybe he will come out'.
Kosie Venter's reply - "Nah,Warney will get there before me"

Shane Warne to Darryl Cullinan as he comes to the crease on a SA tour of OZ: "I've been waiting 3 years for you".
Cullinans reply : "Looks like you've spent it eating"

Answer 6

For me its Abdul Qadir asked Tendulkar when early days of playing., He asked tendulkar Bacho peelo maa ka dhood peyo.

the next over Mustaq Ahmed bowled to Tendulkar about 18 runs was scored by tendulkar single handedly.

Then Qadir asked him hey don't mess with kids (Mustaq) I will bowl now bacho

Tendulkar returns with 28 runs from the Qadir's over.

1996 WC QF against Ind Vs Pak Aamir sohail hits 3 fours in offside. 1) to the third man 2) Mid Off 3) Square he told Azaruddin to keep a fielder on straight because he was going to hit a four.

Azaruddin refused. Venkatesh Prasad Bowled a bouncer in mid pitch Sohail came to the down ground but misses the ball but ball done the magic it hits the stumps. This one is a great legendry sledges

Answer 7

TO Mr. TWILIGHT,

THE MATCH WAS AN EXHIBITION MATCH WHERE SACHIN AND QADIR INVOLVED IN 1989 SERIES.SACHIN HIT 6 AFTER 6 OFF QADIR'S BOWLING.

NEVER DENY WHICH YOU DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THAT ISSUE.

WELL. LET US COME TO VILLAGE CRICKET.

A VILLAGE VIP'S SON WAS BATTING AND 1 RUN TO WIN.

THE BOWLER TRAPPED HIM BY LBW.
UMPIRE GAVE OUT.
OUR BATSMAN RUN TOWARDS UMPIRE WITH RAISED BAT TO ASSAULT HIM. UMPIRE RAN ALONG ALL THE GROUND.

THE MATTER SETTLED WITH LETTING BATSMAN TO BAT AGAIN.

THIS TIME ONE OF THE FIELDER CAUGHT HIM UP.
NOW OUR HERO CHASED THE FIELDER AND THE ISSUE SETTLED AGAIN.

FRUSTRATED BOWLER BOWLED A WIDE WILLINGLY TO FINISH THE MATCH.

BUT THE UMPIRE WAS THREATENED TO NOT GIVE A WIDE.
COZ, OUR HERO WANTED TO HIT THE WINNING SHOT.

THIS TIME THE BALL HIT THE STUMPS. (BUT VILLAGE CRICKET HAS NO BAILS.) SO, THIS TIME TOO HERO SURVIVED.
IRONICALLY, THE OVER CAME TO AN END. THE RUNNER END PARTNER PREPARED HIMSELF TO FACE THE NEXT OVER.
THIS TIME HE WAS WARNED NOT TO SCORE.
ATLAST OUR HERO MADE A SHOT AND WON THE MATCH TREMENDOUSLY.

Answer 8

playing village cricket the scorer shouted out "whats the bowlers name?" to which the visiting team shouted back "Jeavons" (His name was Andrew Jeavons!)

Our opening bat then said "lets see your balls Gizzum (rhymes kind of) we were killing ourselves.

You had to be there.

Answer 9

the above one was told by eddo brandes of Zimbabwe to Mc grath

i love the tussle between sarwan and Mc grath
Mc,Grath : How does Lara's Di** taste like ?
Sarwan : Go and ask your W*fe..
Mc grath : if u F** talk about my wife i will f** slit your F** throat

during that series Mc grath wife was suffering cancer

Answer 10

Batsman given OUT Lbw, walks past umpire and out of side of mouth says "that wasn't bloody out and you know it". Umpire replies "look in to-morrow's paper and then YOU'LL know it".