I'm 17 but I will be 18 in december. Thats only a few months away and everyone around me is making it known. Everytime I turn around I hear "You're going to be 18 soon, do this that and the other thing" and I'm like "Whoa, I wasn't ding that 6 months ago, you didn't teach me how to do that and now I'm supposed to figure it out for myself?" I don't feel like I was prepared for some of the things that come wih adulthood and now a few months before my 18th brithday everyone just expects me to just go out and do it. Push me into the lakeeven though I don't know how to swim. I'm the baby in the family and everything was always done for me but now peole are suddenly telling me i have to do these things for myself, It's freaking me out, i'm literally having panic attacks thinking about it. Also adding to my most likely unnecessary stress is the fact that when I tell my mom about these attacks she laughs it off and tells me "It's not like i'm going to throw oyu out the day you turn 18" but
2006-08-21 20:22:44 · 5 answers · asked by I'm better than you 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
then he goes on these . . . rants about all of the things i'll have to do as an adult and that shes not going to do them for me anymore. It's like shes giving me mixed messages. She gives me that sense of security and then snatches it away, time and time again. So much so that i'm stunted. I want her to eitehr tell me step up right now and stop giving me the security or gove me the security and forget about the stepping up . . at least for now. I don;t know what to do, this has been putting alot of stress on me and I'd love to know if there are anyways to cope, or help cope with this huge step. Please don't tell me to talk to my mom, because everytime i do she laughs it off, everyone does. Any other suggestions would be welcome. A reason as to why i'm freaking out so bad (beside teh blinding fear) would be appreciated too.
2006-08-21 20:28:13 · update #1
It seems you're the only one not laughing, eh? When you think about it, nothing has really happened when you turn 18... The "catastrophic" significance is partly only in your head. The world doesn't change, and the only change you'll surely experience is the normal aging from November to December... Don't sweat it. Your mother laughs your worries off because, well, every adult is expected to live and learn, and stepping into adulthood, people don't really expect you to magically be "good at it" from day 1. But you already know that, don't you?
Whatever your doubts may be, your family, and your intelligence and instincts, will be all you need. And it's perfectly normal to stumble along the way. Don't let your expectations scare you from welcoming a new chapter in your life. Everything's gradual, really. There's no point fearing the inevitable.
2006-08-21 20:54:34 · answer #1 · answered by ELI 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As someone at 21, I can honestly tell you that you are going through one of the toughest times in your life. Questions about college, jobs, love, and life in general loom over you. You want to make the right decision but you're not quite sure what that is-and you know what? It's NORMAL. You also mentioned being the baby of the family-so doing things for yourself-something you haven't done much-terrifies you. Understandably so. What you are experiening is fear of the unknown. The only thing that is going to change that is pushing yourself towards those new experiences. Just think about it. Think of something you used to not know how to do, that you now how to. Do you fear it anymore? You cannot remain sheltered or you will forever fear.
2006-08-21 21:45:32 · answer #2 · answered by nunya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry young lady, In the eye's of the law you are an adult which if you do something illegal you go to regular jail not kid jail. That's all that's changes unless you change and start saying things like I'm 18 now I should be able to come home latter In other words try to use it to your advantage. There is one thing that sticks in my head my father told me when I came back from the service and had to stay in there house for awhile. He said remember as long as your under my roof you follow my rules. So I did until I was able to move out. The same goes for you and nothing will change
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2006-08-24 08:46:04 · answer #3 · answered by robert d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now you wish to be older, but in time you will be older and you will wiosh to be younger, wich is mpossible
2006-08-21 20:28:19 · answer #4 · answered by Jose 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
relax- everyone's just messing w/ your head.
18 is REALLY young still...you're smart, you'll learn.
no one is expecting you to be PERFECT- so don't expect it of YOURSELF.
2006-08-21 20:30:23 · answer #5 · answered by R J 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋