If the couple was never married, and the woman gets pregnant on purpose, why do people still bash the father for not " stepping up ", even though they try to do everything they can for the kid, but nothing for the mother?
2006-08-21 19:07:48 · 13 answers · asked by Benjamin G 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
People like to assume that it is always the fault of the aggresive and worthless man. Never mind that the women in these situations are usually looking for a meal ticket.
2006-08-21 19:16:37 · answer #1 · answered by quikzip7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure your question makes sense. The only bashing I've ever experianced from people is them bashing fathers who don't take responsibility for their kids. Fathers who don't attempt to play a role in their childs life, or who don't pay child support when the money is desperately needed. That, in my opinion, can't be considered bashing. It's stating the facts.
I'm going to ignore the whole "and the woman gets pregnant on purpose" comment because that's an entirely different rant for a different day. It's an ignorant statement. It makes two to make a baby sweetie, in case you haven't been informed of that.
Your question is kind of jumbled and confusing though. So I can't answer every point because I'm not sure of what you're asking..
But I will say this..
There definately ARE instances where some fathers do everything they can for their children and still are made out to be deadbeat fathers. People do, too often, side with single mothers instead of considering the fathers place.
2006-08-22 02:23:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think a woman can get pregnant on purpose. The man had some play in that also.
It sounds like in this case that the mother mightive been 'bashing' the father first, and then people could be disrespecting the father because of her opinions.
As a single mother myself, I know how difficult it is to work, take care of kids, maintain a decent home, and then I hardly have free time for myself. There are a lot more single mothers raising kids then there are single fathers raising kids, and folks out there sympathize single mothers because of them doing it alone.
The father needs to continue helping out with the kid, and maybe it'll stop the 'bashing', Help the mother with odd jobs such as car repair or yard work. That'll help out with the kid, because the kids needs transportation and plays in the yard.
2006-08-22 02:42:51 · answer #3 · answered by sweet southern charm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a woman and i think it is wrong for everyone to always bash on the guys. If the man is going to step up to the plate and take care of the baby then that is all the matters. If the man wants to be with the mother than that is great if not then that is OK too. People can be real stupid about it , just look the other way. If this is about you then you hang in there and do what is right by your child.
2006-08-22 02:40:35 · answer #4 · answered by piperandfrog 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably because people assume the woman has a bond with the child before it is born (this is true...a child is born knowing his/her mother's voice). Fathers dont necessarily have this bond.
Also, unfortunately the dead-beat dad story is just too common nowadays. Good for you if you are trying to be different!
2006-08-22 02:19:32 · answer #5 · answered by kari 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sort of confused.first of all i dont belive that i believe that the child should have both parents whether together or not and they both should have the same role in the childs life.men have a bad name because there are a lot of dead beat dads but on the other hand i know there are dead beat moms. as long as both parents are doing their part that is all that matters.remember that it is not the parents who suffer through all the bs it is the child and its not fair so as long as u do your part thats all that matters no matter what people say.
2006-08-22 02:15:59 · answer #6 · answered by nvvlewis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because it a lot of cases, NOT ALL, men leave women when their pregnant and she has to raise the kid on her own. But I'm with you, there are a lot of bitches out there that get pregnant on purpose to "catch" the guy.
2006-08-22 02:21:08 · answer #7 · answered by PhiSigCloud 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He still had a part in it, he still brought a life into the world why shouldn't people side with the one who is more responsible of the two?
2006-08-22 02:15:22 · answer #8 · answered by Titanic 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If neither one of them were taking precautions on her not coming out pregnant than it's not her fault; it's both. But just remember that the mother is the one that went through all the pain, mood swings and everything that comes with pregnancy.
2006-08-22 02:14:44 · answer #9 · answered by littlecloieinttown 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ideally, one would lwant to "do for" the mother of one's child...however, as long as the kids are getting what they need...all should be cool. My kids' dad never really gave me anything...but he always took care of his kids and that is what matters and visa versa....now that they are living with him, i do for them (and not him) and we con't fight about it. Its just cool like that between us. Kids are happy and I do for myself.
Good luck to you
2006-08-22 02:13:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋