I am married but my husband and i live in different cities, what should i do?

Question

I AM 25 AND FAITHFUL TO MY HUSBAND BUT I DONT KNOW IF HE IS DOING THE SAME.

Answer 1

Well either you can invest in frequent flier miles or you can move. Marriage is suppose to be about taking the plunge to be together, although for couples considering divorce, this would be a great way to stay married.....live apart. It's an odd situation honey, and in all honesty, I don't think there is a one of us that could really tell you what to do. You probably have very valid reasons for having things the way they are. But you may want to reconsider those reasons. Its obviously not working and it's putting a strain on your marriage. I think you should talk to your husband and reach some sort of compromise as to where each of you are going to live under one roof.

Answer 2

Well I use to do the same thing. For three years. He in NYC and me in North Carolina. I spent 50% of my time in NY.

I strongly suggest planning on moving to the same place. I wouldn't worry about cheating since you had to take that on prior to getting married....(unless you moved apart since for school or work)...

I would suggest that unless both of you are completely happy living separately that it is very hard. For me, it didn't cause a problem at all because we saw each other every other week for 5-6 days. And I have known couples that have lived across the US for up to 4 years. (both finishing residencies at different hospitals)...

The most important part is maintaining the intimacy. You need to talk on the phone more than once a day. You need to share life virtually. Separate lives lead to separate interests. Like any good relationship, you need to spend lots of time together.

I won't say the negative stuff about distance. You know that already. I can just say that it can work if you both want it too. I do want to mention that worrying about whether you spouse is cheating sends up flags that you are spending enough time together. It is only natural to want a regular sex life.

It is both of your responsibilities to make that possible. So do what you can to make the time apart fly and maximize the time together till you can be together all the time.

Answer 3

well these days its so hard to tell i can feel your heart right know tears are runing down your face as you are thinking about this when you marry some one there is a bound between a women and a husband a bound of love and trust or else you wouldn't of marry this man you are feeling very lonely right know and scare and you need your husband next to you for security and love because you mess his touch the way he smell when he hold you so close the way he kisses you when you look in his eye just think of these things and know that he love you with all of his heart and that the bond you two have well not be broken because Jesus has brought you 2 together and let know man separate you two.god bless you

Answer 4

Why should you doubt that he is not faithful to you? A good and happy married life is based on 100% trust. Unless something is bothering you and makes you suspect that he is not faithful, do not have unnecessary doubts and ruin your marriage. Why don't you try and move in with him so that both of you can be together and close to each other?

Answer 5

Yeah my husband and I had to do this for about 6 months. It actually helped our marriage and we were both faithful. There are these things called surprise vistits and if you just have to know, just ask him. I am sure when you can tell if your husband is lying or not.

Answer 6

i think living in another city than your husband would be very difficult...i think that you two should think of some way to live together....that is what marriage is all about..to live under one roof and support each other....yes i would wander too if i had to live in another city than my husband...i do not think with my experience with men anyway i would like it very much...i would suggest to him that you two find some way to change your present circumstances...you are under stress worrying if he is faithful to you...and you want your husband and to be with him , that is normal....all i know is to talk to him and one of you quit your job or whatever is keeping you from living together....trust is a big part of married life...but being together and sharing your life is also a big part of it....so move back in with your husband and be his wife....and share love, problems and whatever you have to work out together...

Answer 7

i understand sometimes circumstance forces married couples to live in different cities. But you should visit each other every weekend if its driving distance. And trust me the excitement of seeing your spouse and spending time with him/her is awesome. But leaving is always painful. But the fun part is, that it is just like dating even though your married. And the love making is unbelievable

Answer 8

The million dollar question.....Do you trust him? If you trust him and know he loves you, then everything is alright. If he has ever shown any interest to other women in the past then he could very well be unfaithful. It all depends on what your relationship was like before he left. Good luck sweetie. Trust is a very big thing in a relationship. If you do trust him, let him know and tell him everyday that you love him.

Answer 9

gurl dont u think u guys should be living in the same city i mean u are married >>? an go see him ask him if he is or not spy on him i totally would just to prove him tht u couldent fine out if he was cheating or not

Answer 10

go move into his house and live with him

i really don't understand how you can be married and living apart, i could maybe understand a spouse being in jail or on a space mission in a space station orbiting mars or something like that, but simple civies married and living in seperate cities? go figure