I have another important question for all of you.... please read.?

Question

I know this is no ones problem but my own...

but once again for the 12th year. My daughters father has forgoten her birthday

. And she is twelve. I came on here last week asking if people would send her a yahoo birthday card.

Thanks for those who responded. I was hoping to get more responses to make her birthday so special.

her email address is

[e-mail]

I have thought about sending her a card in the mail with money and signing his name, but I would have to keep doing it every year and then on christmas.

for the last week she waits for the mail to come waiting for a card from him. the phone rings and she runs thinking it is her father calling.

i would appreciate if you could help me out. and please no rude responses. Right now I just can not handle any rude responses ok....

FYI....... he walked out on us, I never once stopped him from seeing his daughter. he made the choice.

Answer 1

I'm sorry. Yeah, he sounds like a real jerk.

I would just tell your daughter the truth. She'll be mad at you later for deceiving her, that way.

I know it will be hard but that really is ALL you CAN do.

Just try your best, like you are now, to make her birthdays really special. You are a good mom.

I'm going to email her a HAPPY BIRTHDAY, right now, from greagoff 1000.

Look for it in the in box.

Give her a hug for me...Molly.

Answer 2

you are lying to her. don't keep the truth from her. Especially since soon she will be going through puberty and her whole world will change. She needs someone she can trust and if she finds out you didn't tell her about how her father does forget her birthday she will never ever trust you. Tell her, you are sorry that he didn't call. Sometimes he forgets. She will cry. She will be sad. But be there for her when she cries. Don't make excuses for him....Oh and by the way.....this is coming from someone who's father NEVER sent her a card or phone call in the 24 years I have been alive

PS you need to get your daughter's email off of the internet. So much for you "trying" to protect her.....protect her from her father but not predators...eh?

Answer 3

I'm very sorry, for you and your daughter. I've been where she is and I've been where you are now. Just sit down and be honest with her. Children ALWAYS think it is their fault, that they are doing something wrong when parents aren't demonstrative and attentive. She needs to know that she is a wonderful, beautiful girl and that her Dad has some problems. She needs to know that, if he hasn't done anything in 12 years, he probably won't ever. It's cruel for her to have expectations of him calling when we both know that probably won't happen.

Do you have any close male relatives, neighbors or church members who could make her day special each year? I certainly applaud your attempts to do something sweet for your baby girl, but it would mean much more to her to spend time with people she knows...just a thought :-)

And you are right - it is a terrible idea to send her something and pretend it is from him. You are the one who loves her, is there for her every day, the one she can rely on....she needs to know she can trust you to be honest with her.

You are a good Mom and your daughter will get through this. I know - I've been there from both sides. Be honest with her and surround her with as much love and support as you can from friends and relatives so she knows there are other people on whom she can rely. I will certainly send her some cards :-) Hugs to you both

Answer 4

dont know whats in your mind that you put your daugther's email add here or was it her email or it's your email?
dont worry ill try to email you some good stuff for the bday and for the christmas.
just a tip,if the email is true better erase this questions while early,every person is different you can never tell.
why not try asking some of your friends to make email and email her.be at your daugther,live and have joy woth her,being with her can reduce and relieved the pain of no father,S U P P O R T is the best thing to do!=D

Answer 5

I haven't seen my father since I was 5. I love him very much but I have hard feelings towards him also. I am in love with the father that cared for me and took me on vacations and out for Italian Ice on the weekends and enjoyed spending time with me. Not the father that let his precious little girl slip away.

It's really a confusing thing but it is not your job to create (make-up) a father for your daughter. The father she has will do, you don't have to fill in his blanks with fake cards and so forth. If he is not involved she will deal with it. As she gets older she may be able to express to her father how she feels about him not being involved in her life. As long as she has free access to her father, meaning you don't forbid her to call or see him she will understand that you did all you could.

Have you talked with him about how his daughter feels when he leaves her hanging? You just focus on being a good mother and provider for your daughter it sounds like you may be becoming the mother and father for her.

Answer 6

I am so sorry to hear that your ex is doing this to your wonderful girl.

Trying to make her feel better by sending cards in his name is a bad idea, because someday the truth will come out. If she finds out you lied, she will be even more hurt.

She is old enough to be talked to about some ideas honestly. Tell her about her dad, good and bad. Tell her about your marriage. Tell her some people are not mature enough to be parents, and it has nothing to do with the child.

Also, if this seems to be affecting her happiness and mental wellness, please consult a counselor with experince in this area.

Answer 7

how do you send an e-card? If I knew how I would send one. By the way if her father walked out on you guys then personaly I don't think that it is your fault I think it is his for missing out on all the joy and happyness that his daughter could have brought to his life.

Answer 8

You must remove this post immediately before your daughter becomes a victim to an online predator. Have some sense, woman! Never give out any personal information about children on the internet.

Answer 9

what kind of a mother puts her 12 year old girls e-mail address out there for any and all pervert to send her stuff

Answer 10

my ex did the same thing, so when she cried i would call him up and then pretend that he was the one that called, that worked for a long time, and finally he did start calling on his own when she was 15. i just couldnt stand to see her cry for him.