I fell out of love with my husband a long time ago. I am pretty sure I am in love with another man. It is someone I have known for about 27 years and we rediscovered each other a few years ago. All my children are grown and I feel like if I stay here I'll go insane. The other guy and I have only talked so far,but we both want more. What should I do?
2006-08-21 18:11:39 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was married for 26 years and I left my marriage becasue there was no intimacy for years. He lied about everything. And I know the moment the love left my heart.
Leaving him was the best thing I ever did. The first guy you come across might not be the one for you. You need to leave your marriage for you and not for someone else. The someone else might not be all you think he is.
Let me tell you romance and intimacy at this age is incredable........way beyond what I ever imagined
2006-08-21 19:33:49 · answer #1 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
25 years is a long time to just let go. You said your husband had several affairs...were they during the early years of life or is he still doing that?
This other man..was he married? For how long? What truly happened to his marriage? (if he was married).
You may think you are in love with this other man or you may be, but you don't know how it will be to live with him. There is a lot to think about.
You must have really loved your husband to have stayed with him knowing he had run around on you.
If you leave him will you be moving straight into the house with the other man? If so, this may be hard for your children to except, even if they know their dad did you wrong first,......You know the saying 2 wrongs don't make a right. Actually it makes a damn big mess.
Do you know how hard it will be if you live alone? No one in the house but you, one income, no one to help make decisions,or no one to confide in.
This other man may be just what you need right now, but is he going to be just what you want 6 months or 6 years down the road?
Did you start talking to this man before all your children moved out? If so, maybe you should cut your communication off with him for a little while and see if you and your husband can rekindle things now that you have a lot of alone time.
Any way good luck to making the right decision.
My own opinion...Try to make things right with the husband first.
2006-08-21 18:48:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to end one relationship before you jump into another honey, or things are just going to get really complicated. I know you are trying to justify it in your mind with the logic that what's good for the goose is good for the gander, but you know better...that's why you are asking. If you aren't in love with the hubby and this new man catches your fancy, then do the proper thing and get a divorce. If you are staying because of the history and the stability as well as the idea of keeping the family together, consider this.....your children are grown, your life is getting shorter with each passing minute and the longer you wait, the more likely it's not going to happen. I wish you well.
2006-08-21 18:21:04 · answer #3 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Clear situations are always best. I f you need to hide something, you'll never be happy. After such a long time, I guess it has become irrelevant to set the blame. If you believe that you've had enough, I'd go for the divorce, even if there's money in the middle. There's nothing on Earth more important than be happy and make someone else happy. So close your circles and go for it. If you're both on the same frequency, you have nothing to fear. If there's doubt in either one of you, you may want to get a divorce for yourself and live your own life... In any case...This has worked for me: If I'm not happy, there's no way I can make someone else happy.
2006-08-21 18:25:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well divorce him first so he wont go around calling you a cheater even though he cheated on you several times.. i mean if you have any character about yourself make sure you are divorced bc cheating is not good as you know that already. bc if you go ahead and sleep with him and he finds out there is no telling what he is gonna do to you because he thinking he has cheated on you this many times and you didnt do anything about and she is not going to cheat on me..yeah just have a lil character about yourself and you will end up on top ..not him..you will have the man you want and he can have all the women he want..really think about who is going to do all the things you have done for him probably no of them he has messed around with. And see the man you are interested in and he being interested in you that is someone who will appreciate you and what you do in the end..if he is for real..that is the best love u can have and get in ur life.
2006-08-21 18:25:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two wrongs don't make a right. If you want another man, you should divorce your hushand and then talk with this other man. You have to do what is right in the eyesight of God. My sister in-law is going through the same thing with my brother. He is living in sin with another girl and the girl knows that he is married with five kids and is still fooling around with him. I did not tell her to divorce him, just to pray and ask God what to do. I am not telling you to leave your husband, just ask God what to do. He will never lead you wrong!
2006-08-21 18:38:35 · answer #6 · answered by Apostolic Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only reason you stayed with your husband was because you didn't want to be alone and being with him was better than that. Now you have someone to go to so you are ready to move on. Please don't use the excuse about his affairs to leave. Your leaving because you found someone else, probably something your husband never counted on. Leave and don't look back, you already put in your time.
2006-08-21 18:31:21 · answer #7 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cindy your husband is retaining out for the different female, I mean come on he reported he's uncertain that he desires to start up over in a dating with a 9 3 hundred and sixty 5 days previous in touch. To me that could desire to study, nicely Cindy i've got no longer thoroughly broken it off with you because of the fact the different female hasn't reported confident to me yet. additionally you do no longer might desire to bypass away abode to "finally end up", that in basic terms became into his excuse to bypass out and characteristic an affair without feeling responsible. think of approximately it, your husband no longer in basic terms walked out on you yet your 2 infants, incredibly the only that lives at abode. I say get a good lawyer so which you will record for divorce and stay in counseling that can assist you discover ways to handle the grief that comes from getting a divorce. additionally in case you % anymore suggestion you may e mail me...and robust success.
2016-10-02 09:38:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think it is a tough decision to take after 25 yrs of marriage. Anyway, I would suggest u talk with ur children and let them know how u feel, before u take any decision..
Hope everything works out well...
All the best...
2006-08-21 18:20:38 · answer #9 · answered by skr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u should go for the other guy u should tell your hasband the trith if he loved u as much as he did he wouldent have cheated on u and if he wants to cheat hell why not just leave him and he can be with all the gurls he wants an u can be with the man u want u both will be happy all in all it will work out for both of u can have ur cake an eat it
2006-08-21 18:22:42 · answer #10 · answered by koolezville07 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋