2006-08-21 17:11:33 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Other - Entertainment
A blonde walks into an electrical store.
blonde - how much is that TV?
salesman - sorry madam we don't sell to blondes.
Next she dyes her hair black and goes back
blonde - how much is that TV?
salesman - sorry madam we don't sell to blondes
Finally the next day she dyes her hair red and goes back
and gets the same reply.
So she asks the salesman why and he says - because madam that's a microwave!
2006-08-21 17:26:52 · answer #1 · answered by me 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Great Reasons To Be A Guy...
Phone Conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
Dry cleaners and hair cutters don't rob you blind.
You can go to the bathroom without a support group.
You can leave the motel bed unmade.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.
If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking: "He must be mad at me."
Gray hair and wrinkles only add character.
Wedding dress - $2,000. Tuxedo rental - 75 bucks.
You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a little gift.
If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
Your pals will never trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"
You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You don't have to shave below your neck.
Gas (at either end) is cool.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
2006-08-21 17:20:16 · answer #2 · answered by teashy 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
a big fat mama loved sitting on the couch eating popcorn while watching TV, she had a chihuahua dog, then suddenly she couldnt find the dog, she looked everywhere but in vain so the second day she decided to put up a poster, as she was doing so a passer by saw her and asked her what was lost, she replied her chihuahua on the poster was lost, the passer by told her, mum dont worry its right BETWEEN YOUR BUMS!
IT SO HAPPENS THAT SHE SAT ON THE POOR DOG AND IT GOT STUCK THERE!
This is a good one
two old men on the prime of their life decided to go to town and enjoy their last days at a brothel
the lady of the brothel saw them and was like There is no way am gonna waste my girls on these old goons, so she odered one of the house organizer to put up large dolls on each room of the old men,
by the time they were going to bed the old men were so drunk, so the tale the next morning was, !
1...man i think my gal was dead?
2...why would you say a thing like that?
1...coz all the time i was loving her she never said a word
2...am sure you dint notice
The second guy said
1...man i think mine was a witch!
2...why would you say something like that?
1...because when i gave her a love bite, she flew out of the window farting loudly!
ha ha ha
am sure i made your day so give me the ten points and i sincerely hope you feel better!
2006-08-21 18:40:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
mate their is a black dude and a white dude standing at a urinal and the white guy looks over at the black dude and says wow what a great big dick you got. hey how did you get it? the black guy says when i was young i tied a brick to my wang and it stretched it out! oh OK says the white guy.
a week later they see each other on the street corner the black guy goes to the white guy "hey how's i going" the white guy says "great i am half way their already, it's turned black"
cheers mate. feel better soon.
2006-08-21 17:30:52 · answer #4 · answered by sidorczukv 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Saddam Hussein's official doubles were all in a room. They were worried as they hadn't heard from their leader for a long time. One of them switches on the TV and are shocked to discover that their beloved leader has been caught in a car bomb. Suddenly one of Saddam's aides comes in and says to the gathered men, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that our beloved leader is alive; the bad news is that he has lost a leg..."
2006-08-21 17:20:58 · answer #5 · answered by hasina_ghani 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
what did the leper said to her mother while riding on a bike?
"Look mom, no hands!"
-from FHM The Biggest Book of Bar Room Jokes
2006-08-21 17:20:25 · answer #6 · answered by pohon88 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I have a cold too and feel like total sh*t. Go to You Tube and search animal videos it always makes me feel better. And......
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
Why are you shaking she is going to eat me!
2006-08-21 17:55:31 · answer #7 · answered by Cali Girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Q: What's the difference between a full-time musician and a large pizza?
A: The pizza feeds a family of four.
2006-08-21 17:22:52 · answer #8 · answered by settlet 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What do you call a blondes skeliton in a closet
A;The winner of last year hide n seek game
2006-08-21 17:17:02 · answer #9 · answered by Lost 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Three tomatos, a mommy, daddy, and kid, were walking home.
The kid tomato was moving really slow and falling behind the other tomatos, and the dad tomato turns to him and yells "Hey! Ketchup!"
Its supposed to be corny.
2006-08-21 17:18:19 · answer #10 · answered by L337ragdoll 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋