I'm only young and I've seriously been thinking about it, but I'm too afraid that I wouldn't be able to fulfill my master's needs. I'm looking for advice from people who know about it to help me.
2006-08-21 15:03:14 · 7 answers · asked by Adam G 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Do a LOT of reading and a lot of talking, with people in the Scene, and with the potential "master" before you get involved. There's no fast path to submissiveness, and anyone who says "you can be mine in a week" is probably crazy or really inexperienced in the Scene. (Instant Master: Just add bulls--t.)
Anybody who dismisses the concepts of "safe, sane, and consensual" is too risky to be with, in my opinion. And yes, slaves most *certainly* have limits and the right to withdraw consents....
Remember also that a Master/Mistress/Dominant also has the responsibility of fulfilling a submissive/slave's needs. This, like any other relationship, is NOT a one-way street.
A BDSM relationship can be satisfying, but is also a tremendous amount of work. You MUST communicate openly, honestly, and effectively if it's going to have a ghost of a chance. And in case you were thinking it's all about Hot Leather and Wild Whips, sorry---you've got to get out of bed or away from the St. Andrew's cross sometime. Most Lifestylers I know spend quite a bit of time dealing with mundane issues....just like their plain old vanilla counterparts....
Here's a list of recommended readings for starters, in no particular order. You should be able to get a lot of them through Amazon.
1. SM 101: Jay Wiseman (One of the best "general purpose" SM books I know, with good information talking about SM versus abuse. Wiseman's very health-and-safety conscious, FYI.)
2. Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns (Miller and Devon). General-purpose; predominantly heterosexually oriented. Excellent reference lists in appendices.
3. Different Loving (Brame, Brame, & Jacobs). A collection of interviews with people from different sexual perspectives.
4. Jack Rinella has a number of essay collections which I've heard spoken highly of by Gay kinksters.
5. Excellent BDSM site: Castlerealm.com, which has a number of useful links. You may find the TES site useful.
2006-08-21 16:27:54 · answer #1 · answered by samiracat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are heading down a very bad track. Slave/master is NOT about sex, it is about total control, 24/7. It is one thing to play games in the bedroom, totally another to live the life. There is no way you can have any self respect when your life is spent in servatude and punishment..ridiculous concept. Good luck
2006-08-21 16:18:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Get a spiked dog collar and a heavy chain, crawl on all fours, have your master lock you in a training cage while he isn't home, and when he does get home, kiss his feet, lick his a--, and just go from there. He'll love you for it.....I know someone who lives like that and they are happy.......good luck........
2006-08-21 15:11:09 · answer #3 · answered by silhouette 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
There are so many websites for subs. Try Island of Gor. I got scared.
2006-08-21 15:08:50 · answer #4 · answered by cello_drama 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You had better know who you want to serve -very- well. If you lack trust, don't do it.
But within a loving and trust-worthy relationship, it can be truly beautiful.
2006-08-21 15:11:47 · answer #5 · answered by bobkgin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah. My advice is get your head examined.
2006-08-21 15:09:48 · answer #6 · answered by Mark F 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
ASK DR.PHIL AND RUBIN
2006-08-21 15:08:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋