The children don't always want to go?
2006-08-21 14:19:49 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
I think at 13 you can go back to court and let them tell the judge they don't want to go. That is what happened with a friend of mine and the judge decreed that the child did not have to go if they didn't want to.
2006-08-21 14:25:15 · answer #1 · answered by mlc24_1980 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Custody and visitation in most states are based on the standard of the child's best interests. Once a child is around eleven or twelve years old, the judge will usually take their opinions into consideration. The child will generally NOT be allowed to make the decision on their own, however. The reason for this is that at that age, a child may choose to be with the parent who gives them the most freedom, when that freedom may not be in the child's best interests (i.e., not wanting to be with Mom because she makes him come home at a certain time).
If there is abuse (physical, mental, emotional) on the part of the dad, the child should certainly have the opportunity to tell the judge about this.
Every jurisdiction has some variation on the guardian ad litem. This is a person appointed by the court who looks out for the child's best interests. I would recommend asking the court to appoint a guardian ad litem for your child(ren), and taking it from there.
Good luck to you and your family.
2006-08-21 15:20:29 · answer #2 · answered by Vicki D 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Whatever the age, make sure it's really because THEY do not want to go and not because they are feeling pressured by whomever (presumably the divorced mom) that they are living with, out of some misplaced sense of guilt. Parents should not tell tales out of school to their kids about their ex, nor should they play on them to get sympathy. Don't make the kids your friends and confide in them. Parents woes are not the kids' responsibility.
2006-08-21 14:56:17 · answer #3 · answered by LindaLou 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on the state. There are varying ages at which kids are allowed to decide whom they want to spend time with. Usually it's around 13 to 15...but it could be older or younger.
Contact the lawyer who handled your divorce....s/he should be able to give you an answer.
2006-08-21 14:25:56 · answer #4 · answered by Silver 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They can really be any age. Custody is based on what parent the children want to be with, determined in family court and the child's opinion and age are taken into consideration.
2006-08-21 14:25:54 · answer #5 · answered by Adam 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well in most parts i believe the age is 12 years old when they can make up their own mind as to where they want to be. it would be best to check the local area laws in family law regarding this matter.
2006-08-21 14:25:47 · answer #6 · answered by ehatis98 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
look, if you don't want to hang out with your dad that's your prerogative...but don't listen to people that have a negative outlook toward your father...gather your own opinion.. and give your father a chance..he might not be that bad of a guy...
2006-08-21 14:38:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would talk to my kids to find out why they don't want to go and then unless abuse is happening, you need to talk to your Ex and work something out. Sometimes kids need to do things they don't want to do. Your Ex is their dad and he deserves to be able to be there for them.
2006-08-21 14:27:38 · answer #8 · answered by roomwithaview 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to your attorney. Most of the time the kids don't have a choice.
2006-08-21 14:26:21 · answer #9 · answered by kny390 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
they don't always have to go ..you can tell your lawyer and the visitation can be changed.12 years old and they can say they don't want to go at all. Well that is here in Vermont anyway!!
Good luck!!
2006-08-21 14:26:14 · answer #10 · answered by vtlovie 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋