how can i change my boyfriend?

Question

ok my boyfriend is a little off, he's 18 but by his appearence he looks 15, and he acts 15 too, he's not indepenent at all, he dosen't have a drivers licence, car or anything else,he is so controlling and won't let me do anything, he won't even let me go to the store with my parents,but we are both each others first love, and we both lost our virginity to each other,so ya we love each other, he just dosen't really know how to be in a realationship. i need advice on how to change him or something, and it's hard for me to talk to him, he very hard headed

Answer 1

if u try to change your boyfriend...you are trying to change the person you fell in love with....

Answer 2

I'm sorry but you can't change someone who doesn't want to change. Hopefully he does but if he loves you there needs to be good communication and understanding. Give and take from both of you and a lot of respecting another feelings and aspirations. I have a strong problem with him controlling you because I was in an abusive relationship years ago because it got out of hand. This shows me a big red flag! If it doesn't improve soon, I would tell your parents or close friends to advise you on this. That control he has is very dangerous and UNHEALTHY for a loving relationship. To have a mature relationship, you both need to be interdependent and be a positive influence on each other. You can contact me if you need too. Good luck

Answer 3

You get an answer from a hard headed guy who's been over the hills a couple of times. You CANNOT change him. The only person whose behavior you can control is yours. He won't get better the longer you're with him. In fact, he'll get more hard headed.
To be very blunt about it, love is a choice and, as it says in the Bible, love is kind and gentle, affectionate, tender, and soft. It isn't hard or demanding, or controlling. Read and heed. You may have a relationship with him but it isn't any kind of love contemplated by dictionaries or the Bible.

Answer 4

To be honest with you,the only way your b/f will change is if he wants to.For him to be so controlling over you is very alarming because it can progress to physical abuse over time.I think you should talk with a counsler and see if your b/f will talk as well.I can understand you love him but you need to have trust for one another and respect,if he is that controling over you he has no respect for you.The two of you might need some time apart and see if that makes him look futher into himself and discover what his problem is.I hope you the best.

Answer 5

Change him h*** get away from him you will have no fun and no life with this loser.He is a loser from the beginning so why do you want to be mixed up in this kind of life. If it is sex you can find sex anywhere,but I don't think this is the case,you may have some feelings but please move on be for your life is in a jam.You can find better and better is out there for you.

Answer 6

For you to believe that he will change will never happen..he is 18 years old and is set in his ways..he is very controlling and that's not normal..for him not to allow you to go with your parents says it all..you need to leave him and not look back..men like him, who care very controlling can become abusive..they are have mental problems that cant be cured..its sad i know but its life..find yourself a good man and leave him alone.

Answer 7

don't try and change him cause if you do you'll end up changing somthing that shouldn't be changed about him mabey even somthing dat made u fall in love with him but try talk to him and if he won't listen try putting him on a lil punish meant as in a silent treatment or somthing but if u do want him 2 change make sure he does it by him self but not u forcing him 2

Answer 8

you cant change someone else-only find someone who already fits what you need-dont bother trying-it will only make things harder-and no offense but the person you lose your virginity to is special but by no means is likely to be the love of your life

Answer 9

You cant change him..only time will give him more education.. Let go.. I know its hard.. I still love my first love and that was over 40 yrs ago.. and we still keep in contact

Answer 10

sorry hun but you can't change people.. they will change if they want to as time goes on and they become mature

i dont think your to mature either.. you associate sex and love and just because you have sex does not mean you love each other.. maybe you do but sex and love are totally different things

Answer 11

Accept the fact right now, you can NEVER change them.