I am in a relationship with a guy who has been seeing a lady a lot older than him, and tells me it's hard to leave her because I don't know how much they have been together and tells me to give it time. It has been a long time and still no improvement. Any advice would be helpful.
2006-08-21 09:31:55 · 40 answers · asked by browneyed_gurl05 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Don't take second place. Move on. You deserve someone who will love and respect you.
2006-08-21 09:38:27 · answer #1 · answered by Otis F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well it depends how long u've been with him and if u really love this guy. i know its hard. But honestly deep inside you're the only one that would know if he's capable of leavin her or not. Sumthin similar happened to me like that n I had alot of patience until one day i woke up n told him i decided to c other people. Thats when he realized that he was about to lose me and left the other girl. There's so much u could take. It doesnt matter how much they've been through. He needs to know what he wants and stop living in the past. If he's with u is bcuz obviously he likes being with u or maybe he thinks that he could have his cake n eat it too. Try scaring him a bit. Go out n start meeting other people. He probably thinks u're always gona be there for him regardless. Give him a taste of his own medicine. I did it n it worked for me. Now i have 9 yrs with him n it took me atleast 3 yrs for me to actually gain his love completely for myself.
2006-08-21 09:47:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you get involved with someone that is in a relationship in the first place. Dont be nobodies fool or second best for no man its first or nothing at all. He wants to have relations with you but not a relationship. He keeps telling you that it takes time and this time next year he will be telling you the same thing. Leave that loser blowing in the wind.
2006-08-21 09:46:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. if this was someone Else's question and they said 'I'm seeing this guy but he is seeing someone else", what would your response be? You would tell them the same thing we are telling you...Dump him. The guy has no respect for you. Give it time for what?? He's enjoying having 2 women and obviously thinks you are too in love with him to leave. So he's not going to leave the other woman. Don't give him an ultimatum either. Don't say "if you leave her I'll stay." It won't work. He might tell you he is done with the other woman when in reality, he's not. He needs to understand that he can not treat woman this way. Leave him and when he comes crawling on his knees begging you to take him back tell him "Tough S#@T!!!"
2006-08-21 09:47:03 · answer #4 · answered by nc_girl2005 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's happening here is that he has his cake and eating it too. You will always remain on the sidelines probably and if he does leave this older woman for you, then who's to say that he won't do it again. You should have never put yourself in this situation and someone is going to get hurt. I would tell him that his time is up and that you think more of yourself than to wait on a guy that doesn't know what he wants.
2006-08-21 09:42:38 · answer #5 · answered by LISA F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah this type of question is hard to answer unless the person asked knows both people involved. But, typically, if it has been a long time, he is hung up on her bad. Have some pride, give him some space and tell him when he gets over her to give you a call. Until then, quit wasting your time.
2006-08-21 09:44:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweety, distance yourself from the relationship. He has you on the back burner and that isnt fair to you. Apparently he is not a one woman man.....so back away and if he still isnt willing to let the other woman go them break up, end it. And find you a REAL man, thats happy with just you and not having another one on the side. Men like this make me sick, they think that they should have it all, no matter who's feelings they hurt, or hearts they break.
You deserve better sweety!!!
Best of Luck
2006-08-21 09:41:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you both want to be in a relationship where you see other people, then that gives you the option to see other men. Why not?! If he wants an exclusive relationship with you where you only see him, then he needs to just stop seeing her, in all fairness to you.
Regardless of what he wants, if YOU want a monogamous relationship with someone and he's not ready, then keep on looking.
2006-08-21 09:43:11 · answer #8 · answered by dukefan86 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HELL NO!!! take it from me that i experienced the same thing! My so called relationship lasted 6 yrs, like that. i was stupid for waiting around. get on with your life, i did! i regret waiting around so long but im glad i moved on,he is just going to take you for a ride. if u were more important to him than the older woman is, he would have given her the boot in a heart beat!
2006-08-21 09:39:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he has made his decision and is stringing you along. It's probably time for you to invest your heart elsewhere. This sounds a lot like things that married men say to their mistresses. Usually, married men don't leave their wives. It happens, but is not the norm. I wonder, what does he tell her about you?
2006-08-21 09:40:39 · answer #10 · answered by lizardmama 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personaly, I wouldn't be with a girl if she is seeing another dude. That is just wrong and disrespectful! I don't know about you but, I do nto like to share and being used, I think that is what he is doing so, I say no. You can do better!
2006-08-21 09:39:18 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋