i am having a baby and don't get on help with my other one i have a 3 year old and don't ge me wrong i love my kids and always will i just had a hard time getting money for the first one and can't go through this again. like i said i have a 3 year old and she is have some problems with me having this one she acts out. what should i do help me I CANDY
2006-08-21 09:19:36 · 23 answers · asked by I CANDY 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
This is something you should have thought about BEFORE you became pregnant.
2006-08-21 09:28:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't matter if you're ready or not....... You better get ready now! I had an unplanned pregnancy last year( I am married though). And I was devastated b/c my firstborn was only 12mos.old when I found out. We were broke, always struggling to get by(still are). I cried for 3 or 4 mos., but then started having problems threatening to miscarry. So I realized I was griping and taking for granted the best gift a woman could ever have, or give! I now have a 24mo. old and a 4mo. old baby. It is the hardest thing I've ever had to do, just keeping up and caring for them both all day, but by far the most rewarding! We are still broke and struggling, but life IS a constant struggle anyway, isn't it? Just keep your head up and above water. Your kids don't have to have everything to be happy. Just LOTS of love and attention. If you'll notice, most rich kids are never content, because they are showered with $ instead of love and attention. Like I said, just swallow what's happened, and move on. Start focusing on ways to be a good parent, rather than wallowing in self-pity. Or worrying you won't have enough $. Be positive and good luck
2006-08-21 16:42:50 · answer #2 · answered by Jenintn 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
. Are you ready? Is anyone ever 100% ready for a baby... I totally can relate on the difficulties on getting support but you have to do what you have to do for your kids. You say your 3 yr old is having problems with you having the baby? Is she in control or are you? Explain to her that you are the mommy and you make the rules.. that she is going to be a big sister soon and that she has to show the baby how to be a good boy/girl... try and make a big deal out of her being a big sister and make it fun for her too.... Again as for getting money although most systems are overworked and underfunded there are state agencies that help you get child support (and unless you live in IL there are non profit groups that can help you too... google- child support help).. Good Luck
2006-08-21 16:31:51 · answer #3 · answered by Jessica 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ready or not, here it comes!!! You should have thought these things through before you put yourself into a position to GET pregnant in the first place. Has no one ever discussed adequate birth control or abstinence with you??? I would bet on the fact that you're probably not even married.
Have you considered relinquishing the baby for adoption? It might be a viable alternative for you in the situation you're in right now. How about welfare? How about child support from the babies' daddy/daddies? How about getting a job?
I suppose you're looking for sympathy, but sorry sister - you're not going to get a scrap of it from me. Do yourself and everyone else a favor and get your tubes tied after this one.
2006-08-21 16:32:41 · answer #4 · answered by Brutally Honest 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have 5 kids myself and have been through this before. Your daughter is resentful of the attention the new baby is getting and fearful that the new arrival will take her place. Reassure her that you love her as well. Make her a part of the experience by having her help you do things like go fetch you a drink of water, help you practice breathing, etc. NEVER tell her that you cannot do somethign with her because of the baby. Say something like you are too tired or redirect her attention and desires to something else.
2006-08-21 16:29:22 · answer #5 · answered by Tim 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately you decision is already made because you are pregnant. Your three year old of course she is going to act out. She's been your one and only for three years and now thinks someone else is taking her place. She needs to understand that having a brother or sister would be wonderful, all the things they could do together. First of all, you should be getting help from someone, Easily,You know you didn't get pregnant all by yourself!!
2006-08-21 16:57:57 · answer #6 · answered by harborgirl2006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Calm down. Try to enjoy and relax and try to involve your 3 year old, call the baby "her baby" and that's how you refer to the baby. Get her to feel the baby kicking and all that good stuff. A little prezzie when the new arrival gets here went down well for us, from the baby to the big sister that is! All 3 year olds have blips - I think it's 'cos theyve just found some new words and are trying to see how to use them. Enjoy your new family though.
2006-08-21 16:50:56 · answer #7 · answered by aza 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well remember things happen for a reason the reason why the little one acts out is because she feels that the new born is going to take her place just let her know that she a big girl now and that shell have a new friend to play with give both the same attention so the 3year old wont feel left out
2006-08-21 16:32:25 · answer #8 · answered by babyelmo0625 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest not having sex until you're ready for all the consequences. I would also suggest choosing partners who will actually help you and who will behave like men. Seems like someone is a bit irresponsible.
Perhaps you should consider adoption.
You should also look into the WIC (Women, Infants, and Children) program that is offered by the government to help you buy the essential foods for your kids (milk, cheese, veggies, cereal, etc).
2006-08-21 16:28:56 · answer #9 · answered by Goose&Tonic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll get through this, just prepare your daughter, read her books about being a big sister or movies. Tell her that this is her baby too and that you are going to need her help with him/her. Mostly everybody has thier financial problems, that is just life. Don't get pregnant again if you feel you can't provide for them as you would like to. This time of worry will pass and you will just adjust, as we all do from time to time.
2006-08-21 16:32:59 · answer #10 · answered by bopbo 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
re your 3 old - i would suggest including in lots of things relating to your pregnancy - letting her feel ur tummy, and listen , helping u select baby clothes, theres some good books around relating to this you can read to her, get her a dolly baby too, with a little pram etc, reassure her, do the whole -"gonna be a big sister - how very special that is "- thing
As for the rest - good luck with whatever you decide to do
2006-08-21 16:30:05 · answer #11 · answered by oz_gurl2005 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋