2006-08-21 06:39:43 · 15 answers · asked by Tanya G 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How long have you been married? If not long, give it some time. My husband was like that for a lot of years and no amount of talking made it better. Being a very logical person, he had no need for physical affection and couldn't understand why I did. I've just gotten lately where I couldn't take it anymore and went to a therapist. Turns out I was talking to him the wrong way. A long way to say, talk to your husband. Don't say things like "You never do this..." or "Why don't you ever....", as it feels like an attack to him. Use phrases like, "when you do this it makes me feel" to explain to him calmly why you need him to be affectionate with you. But definitely give him some space.
I've also found that the best to get love from him is to give it. And people show love in different ways, so therefore they recieve it differently too. Find out how he shows love and do something for him that makes him feel loved. For my husband, he likes to be taken care of, like making him dinner and listening when he needs to unload about his day or messaging his knees when they're hurting (he's got bad knees). Make him feel loved and chances are you'll get love in return. But don't nag him or hang on him. That's the surest way to push him away. Men are very different creatures.
2006-08-21 07:00:08 · answer #1 · answered by I'm just me 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You may need some alone time...we all too often forget about the nice stuff...take each other for granted..just doesn't work out well when we do this. Be affectionate with him, perhaps (don't count on it) he will get the idea. If he doesn't have a very nice, affectionate talk with him and tell him you miss the nice little things .... hopefully, he will get back on program. Good luck
2006-08-21 13:46:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband was the same way and we stayed together for 13 years. I never felt fully loved the whole time I was with him.
If your man wasn't lovey dovey to start with he never will be. If he was and he isn't anymore there is hope and many things you can do to let him know you still love and need his touch. If the sex has dwindled too then that could be a sign that he is having an affair or possible a bout with depression.
Most importantly...tell him what you are feeling. Give him a chance to fullfill your needs.
I now have a new "friend" and he hugs the stuffing out of me.
2006-08-21 14:04:20 · answer #3 · answered by Pardonthepun 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this depends on the fact of him ever being affectionate...if he was not affectionate before you married him and were okay with it then it's something you need to deal with. If not then talk to him and tell him you feel neglected...if he's a good man he will understand...some men however, are just not affectionate.
2006-08-21 13:51:23 · answer #4 · answered by Honey Dip 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you can do like I did and divorce him :). If you don't want to go to that extreme though, you can try the usual ways. Buying new outfits, trying new ways to get him interested, sexy video's etc. Or you can accept the fact that some guys just aren't affectionate, and either live with it, or end it.
2006-08-21 13:46:47 · answer #5 · answered by sherrie_66 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When my wife isn't being affectionate I harass her, and tickle her, and pick her up, and say sweet things, and act silly, and run around the house until she realizes that in order to do other things she must be affectionate to me first.
2006-08-21 13:46:20 · answer #6 · answered by akristel2003 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
get a lover!!! there could be a number of reasons why but if he just stoped being affectionate then maybe he is giving his loving to someone else!! but maybe hes not! i love my hubby sooooo much but I'm not a very affectionate person and he excepts that ! he is overly affectionate! maybe your hubby is like me:) if so don't trip potato chip!!
2006-08-21 13:46:31 · answer #7 · answered by notyochic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself how long has it been going on? If only a short time, he may come around, if it is a longer time, there could be some underlying issues that may need to be addressed, but you might want to clear up the question to get better responses.
2006-08-21 13:46:55 · answer #8 · answered by g m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
watch out your man is out having fun with some one else,my husband was the same and I found out he was having an affair boy was that a blow bc I never would believe that either and now he is so sorry but still doing the same and I hate it,I am getting my self starighten out so I can throw him out.just another ho dog.
2006-08-21 13:54:29 · answer #9 · answered by saseycas 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him some space. Be patient and wait til he comes around.
2006-08-21 13:45:45 · answer #10 · answered by chipmunk 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋