I have two children a 16month old and 11 yr old girls. He pretty much left us high and dry!!! I have been trying to move on with my life with my kids who he hardly sees. He went out and bought himself a mecadise and suv bmw when he doesnt even take the kids anywhere. He called me today when he is suppose to be working, and started giving me sh....t about everything. He says he calling to talk to my daughter but ends up trying to argure with me... I recently just went and had my deveated septum fixed, and a few other things done... For myself.. He found out cause I did not tell him... He harrasses me with absoultely absurd questions.. Calls me all sorts of things.. Telling me all the girls love him for his money and more...Is he trying to knock me back down. Why would any one tell someone that stuff. He asks me if I have a boyfriend and so on. Than proceeds to say if you dont you should have one.... Hes driving me nuts...He going to be forty and Iam youger than he is. What to do.
2006-08-21 06:17:16 · 17 answers · asked by carol s 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First off, you get a divorce and file for child support so that your kids are taken care of and all that money he seems to have is spent on them and their well being instead. You also set up terms for visitation rights and make him stick to them. Beyond that just learn to hang up on him. If the topic moves off of talking about the children then you simply hang up or walk away. Stop playing the games he wants to play and you will be fine.
2006-08-21 06:25:59 · answer #1 · answered by rkrell 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I know what I am going to say is vary hard to actually do, cuase I have. I had a very long term relationship with a man who was very mentally abusive. When I finally left he was a bigger jerk (and I am using nice words) would call me just to put me down. He couldnt stand to know that I was doing better than him. He would put me down if I was AND exspecially if I wasnt doing better.
The rest of your story sounds like many of the divorces I have seen go through my job. (divorce attorney).
Men can be reall jerks and yours sounds like a bad one. He just needs to feel better about himself by making you miserable. So dont let yourself get drug in. When he fights with you politly interupt him and tell him if he wants to fight that he will have to do it with someone else and if he persist you will hang up. Then REALLY do it. He's gonna call back mad but again tell him the same thing. Eventually he will either stop calling or get better about not fighting as much. But dont let yourself take that.
Find some time and go out clubing and have some fun. And get to feeling better about yourself and this whole thing will disapeat faster if you feel better about you and can ignore him.
Alright I wrote a book so Ill quit now.
2006-08-21 13:38:11 · answer #2 · answered by Baby Girl 1214 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sad for your loss. Find you a great attorney, file for divorce and sue for alimony. That spirit of selfishness has made him foolish. So, you should allow the strong arm of the law backslap in the face with the hand of REALITY.
Your husband has responsibilities he's legally, morally and financially obligated to take care of. If you have his latest tax returns, you've got a pretty good idea of what he has financially. He'll have to trade up the Mercedes and the BMV for something else because if you do it right, every month he'll remember that there is a HIGH cost to LOW living.
2006-08-21 13:38:04 · answer #3 · answered by obiwanshu 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to read that your husband left you but the way you say he acts, you are better off without him. If he calls and wants to speak to the children that's fine but do not engage in a conversation with him that will lead to arguments and putting you down. If he wants to speak to you, tell him you will only discuss things concerning the kids ONLY not who you are seeing and putting you down. If he continues to argue than hang the phone up. Don't allow yourself to be verbally abused by this man. Obviously he has some issues that needs to be addressed about his insecurities.
2006-08-21 13:31:14 · answer #4 · answered by Shay 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey hon...
sorry you are having such a hard time with this guy you thought was your equal once a upon a time ago! This is no way for you to be treated. Are ya'll divorced already? If so, you can contact your attorney or courts and have a restraining order put on him so he stops harassing you. If your not divorced yet, then my suggestion would be to contact the same or police station because he is verbally abusing you which is considered domestic abuse! you deserve to get on with your life and remember...you and your kids come first! good luck and god bless!
2006-08-21 13:27:37 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweet girl don't you dear take none of his calls, when ever he calls give the phone to your little girl you see he might think all the girls love him now but when his stink a ss get sick with AIDS we will see who loves him then baby just move on and be happy with your kids you have nothing to feel sorry for good luck
2006-08-21 13:34:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop taking his calls. When he calls and want to speak to the children let him but don't engage in conversation with him. Now if you do talk to him and he starts talking crap hang up the phone and if he calls back don't answer and sooner or late he will get the message. Sometimes that's how foolish men act.
2006-08-21 13:24:16 · answer #7 · answered by kitcat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
girl change the phone number to an unpublished number u said yourself he doesn't call to talk to the girls so just change the number try to move on and tell ur ex husband that if he isn't trying to discuss the girls well being that u do not wish to speak with him and file for child support to make sure he finacially takes care of his children i wish u the best of luck
2006-08-21 13:27:34 · answer #8 · answered by ndemby05 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Change your number and get a court order for child support and get a divorce. And yes he is trying to bring you down to his level. If he harasses you and asks you questions that you think he doesnt need to know, then tell him that he needs to have a nice day and hang up on him. Kindness will kill him, so be very kind to him.
2006-08-21 13:25:48 · answer #9 · answered by baby_luv 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wanna p!ss him off? Be happy! He wants you to be sittin' there all miserable without him, wanting him back. When he says things like "all the girls love me for is my money!" reply with "well of course, why else would they love you?" Always keep calm when talking to him like nothing he says fazes you (even if you're exploding inside, wait 'til you're off the phone to scream!!). Keep your tone calm, pleasant, and rational, it will drive him crazy! especially if he's mad and screaming and insulting. If you give the impression that you're in control of yourself and the conversation, he'll just look like he's throwing a temper tantrum!
2006-08-21 13:39:45 · answer #10 · answered by Kimber 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋