We have only been married for 11/2 months and i am afraid of him. I just found out i am pregnant. On our wedding day we had a fight and almost everyday after,until my mom asked us to move in with her. the fighting has stopped some but he has trust issuses and wants to pull me away from my family. He never lets me go out with friends or even talk to them. he checks my messages and who hasme on called my cell phone. I at times feel uncomforable about having sex with him because he wants it all the time and asks me to do things I am not ready for. He has accused me of cheating, knowing that i have not or should i say can not go anywhere with out him. He never says sorry or wonders why i cry alot. He wants me to wait on him like if i was his slave. What do i do? Please advice me if i should leave him or stick around hoping that things will change.
2006-08-21 02:47:46 · 40 answers · asked by roe_roses 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are in an abusive marriage. Things will not change, not without him wanting to change and I doubt he will. Just because he hasn't hit you yet does not mean he won't and does not mean he's not being abusive. He's taking away your freedom, and is controlling your life. That's abusive.
If I were you I would get the hell out of there. Don't let your child be born into such a home.
2006-08-21 02:54:10 · answer #1 · answered by brand_new_monkey 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My question is, why did you get involved with him in the first place? There must have been signs before you got married. Listen, I know it hasn't been long, but this guy is a scumbag and if you dont realize that you'll spend the next 10 years questioning whether you should be with this a**hole or not. Don't waste your life living in fear when love is supposed to be happiness. Change sucks and no one likes it, but this change will only be for the good. Dont get comfortable living in this jerks web. LEAVE!!!! Easier said than done, YES. But dont be that girl that 20 years from now realizes she just threw away the best years of her life because she couldn't take that step.
2006-08-21 02:56:47 · answer #2 · answered by Murfdigidy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seem like to me he wants to be to controlling and you sure don't deserve no controlling man just because you are married to him doesn't make him think he should control you in everyway.If this is not what you want please get out of the marriage hi i know you just got into this marriage 1 1/2 months ago but was he like this before you was marriage, if he was i feel like this should been tried to be fix or have gotten some counseling before it turns into a harsh situation of you been killed or him. He wants to controll you and if u let him he will be in control. Talk to your mother about this also, i know sometimes womens don't want to get their parents involve but when it comes down to someone being killed they are going to wonder why didn't she tell me. I hope for the best for you and him. I can't say if he will ever change, you and him just got married and i hope your marriage work but anyone will tell you to leave him but if you truly love this man you aint going want to, I feel you deserves to be love right and have happiness. GOOD LUCK :)
2006-08-21 02:58:41 · answer #3 · answered by BabyGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here are some signs of an abusive relationship:
1. He doesnt trust you.
2. You're being abused.
3. He is controlling and manipulative.
4. He can't keep a job.
5. You never go out.
I think you should leave, immediately.
2006-08-21 03:40:25 · answer #4 · answered by strong_beautifulqueen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually when they are trying to keep you isolated from friends/family it want be long before the physical abuse parts start. And you just found out you pregnant and you are living with your mom this is not going to set well with him. Because usually abusers don't handle add on responsibilities to well. Get counseling and keep the domestic abuse hot line # close by or better yet get their # and call them for further advice. Good luck!
2006-08-21 03:17:38 · answer #5 · answered by kitcat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bail and bail fast. Those are the first signs of an incredibly abusive relationship. It starts with yelling and jealousy then usually escalates to hitting very shortly afterward. Since you have only been married a month and a half you should be able to get an annulment.
2006-08-21 02:55:15 · answer #6 · answered by babygirl_k2001 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is a control freak. He is insecure and jealous. The only reason he isn't arguing so much now is because he is living in your mom's house. Throw him out. Things are only going to get worse if he stays. He will more than likely be jealous of the baby and you and the child deserve better than that.
2006-08-21 02:54:31 · answer #7 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Things like that won't change without someone else stepping in. If you go to church, go to your clergyman. He's got issues and #1 rule of mates, YOU can't change him. Sounds like a bad apple and I'd get out, even if only until after he gets some counciling. Read what you wrote. You answered your own question. Yes. It's called emotional and mental abuse. Get some help.
2006-08-21 03:01:38 · answer #8 · answered by auld mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is hard when you love someone and you feel as though you are being hurt by them. You have to decide if you want to live in that situation for the rest of your life. More than likely he will never change so think about what you want to do for your sake and your baby's, because you want to make the best life possible for your child
2006-08-21 02:58:12 · answer #9 · answered by catelyn92002 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know which country u live in
but dont let a man ruin ur life like that
take charge get some work do ur own stuff
and seek help from ur church
or report him and leave
this marriage does not seem to have a future anyways so doo all u can if its still not working then u walk out
i am saing try to save it cus u are pregnant
but if its not helping walk out of it
all the best
2006-08-21 03:04:46 · answer #10 · answered by maku d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋