My mum always says 'I want to divorce' because of money???

Question

My father and mum have a certain emolument. But my mum spend a lot. And she finishes her salary very early. Then she wants money from my father but because of bills and credit cards my father doesn't have so much money..Then she says I want to divorce..She isn't listening to us..I'm very sad for this situation..What can I do?

My mum buys clothes, shoes etc...She doesn't pay for my school or for home any more..I can't be open-minded to her..I can't understand her..She doesn't know money's value..

Answer 1

Seninle empati kurabiliyorum Irmak.Maalesef benim ailemde de böyle sorunlar olabiliyor bazen.Gerçi eminim ki o kadar şiddetli değil.Benim başvurmayı akıl ettiğim tek şey ikisine de farklı trip atmak ve boşanma sonrası durumdan bahsederek demagoji yapmak oluyor.Umarım işler daha kötüye gitmez.
P.S. Cevap için teşekkürler ama maalesef ben de sadece o sitede bulabildim sözleri.Ve orada sözler çok eksik.Bu yüzden "absolute" dedim.Bol şanslar.

Answer 2

I can't know your situation from just reading your question, so what I say may not apply to your family. Here goes anyway:

Sometimes mothers are the ones who try to keep everything going for their families and in the houses. They go out and buy groceries, they buy the back-to-school clothes, they buy cleaning products, they may pay the bills, they may pay for kids' dancing lessons or sports, and they may be the ones to call the plumber when the toilet breaks. In other words, mothers can appear to be spending more money than the father who doesn't take on the job of trying to make sure everybody has everything they need and make sure the house has everything it needs to be a home.

These days it doesn't take much to go through a salary if someone is just earning a modest or kind of modest one. Maybe its true your father doesn't have much money, but maybe your mother isn't being unreasonable to expect him to take on some of the expenses.

If she's going out and eating out and buying herself all kinds of shoes and clothes and going to movies etc., then - you're right - she's spending in ways she shouldn't. If she's buying house stuff and groceries and clothes for you and whatever it takes to keep a family and house in what is needed its a different thing.

Mothers can very often look like "the bad guy" if they're married to someone who, say, sits on the couch when he's home and doesn't want to make the unpopular decision to spend money when a family has money issues. For the person who isn't trying to keep things as normal and nice for the family as possible its easy to just no spend.

If your mother tells your father she wants a divorce there may be a good reason for it. Maybe, too, there isn't. You can't make that your worry even though, I know, its a big worry for you. You say, "she isn't listening to us". By saying, "us", its clear that you have taken your father's side. There really shouldn't be an "us" in this situation. It is between your mother and your father, and hopefully they will do what is best for you regardless of whether they get a divorce or whether your mom is just mad for the moment.

Their money fights should not be your concern, even if you have unfortunately had to listen to them. One thing you could do is ask both of them not to fight over money in front of you because it bothers you. Also, try to be open-minded about your mother before you jump to any conclusions. Children don't very often have any idea what it takes to do what a family needs or what kind of spending is involved.

Finally, try to talk to your mother and father either separately or together and tell them you are really unhappy with this, and see if they would be willing to go as a family to a family counselor. If they won't then you are going to have to develop a thick skin and just don't worry about their fighting. I know its hard, but a lot of children do it.

Answer 3

This situation is between your mother and father.
It is strictly up to them to resolve it.

All you can do is let BOTH of your parents know that you love and care for them, and are there for them if they need you.

Good Luck~*

Answer 4

Who wants to divorce whom?

Answer 5

she should have married for money

Answer 6

sorry but ur mom needs to grow up.....