I'm sorry to bother you all with my problems, but I was just wondering if I could get some advice on this. I had a friend who I was pretty close with, but then I got a job which took up a lot of my time. During the summer they were having me work almost every day, so I didn't really hang out with her much, it just turned to weekly phonecalls, sometimes less. I got things straightened out with work & school, but she found other "more available" friends. I've apologized several times for not being a big part of her life for so long, but it seems every time we talk, she'll bring the conversation back to, "...which you would have known if you actually hung out with me such and such a time..." and I'll say I'm sorry, and all she says it that I should be. I want to be her friend, but I feel like she's moved on. Do you think it's even worth it at this point?
Any comments or opinions will be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much for your time!!
2006-08-20 19:17:56 · 9 answers · asked by Becky 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
True friendship doesnt need constant touch,
Even if u dont meet up or hangout every day you can still be very good friends, Your friend's outburst is basically cause she misses you, not because she hates you,
So carry on and dont break up with her, It takes time and effort to make a friend, but just a couple of minutes to turn somebody against you,
Culitivate the friendship but be sure that you are by your friends side when she truly needs you like in sickness and worry, and try keeping in touch more often.
Wish I had you for a friend,
2006-08-20 19:26:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
The friendship has changed, so admit that to yourself. A similar situation happened to me when my friend got a second job and we stopped hanging out as much. It hurt the friendship, partly because when we did get together, he started to get stressed out and nasty towards me, partly because we just did not hang out together so much. And there really was no good reason for the second job. We eventually repaired the friendship, but the closeness I once felt towards him was never quite the same. As an adult, when you get into one of these friendships that are close to a sister/sister or brother/brother relationship, and then something happens that throws a wrench into that, it is devastating, and you don't quite trust the other person ever again as much as you once did. It is sort of like abandonment. It sounds like you still have a friendship with this gal, but it has been lowered a notch, perhaps even from the level of a best or close friendship to a casual one. When my friend (a man around my own age) did this to me, I was angered and devastated. It might have been even worse for your lady friend. I suggest you learn from your mistakes with this gal and NEVER pull such a prank on another close friend again.
2006-08-21 06:20:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let go,the problem is that you filling with guilt at the moment,true friend will understand you and won't use something to against you or make you feel bad,she had more available friends,she want people to spend time with her just for sake hanging out,no matter how little time you spend with her,if she is a true friend,she will understand and in fact you guys should grow closer,in sense if this friendship is meant to be,its obviously not.Don't be heartbroken,cheer up,look on the bright side,you still have some $$$$ from your summer job,indulge yourself and hey,find some new friends that are true and sincere
2006-08-21 03:15:51 · answer #3 · answered by Janet Y 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if your friend continues to draw on the past, as she is doing, then she is no longer much of a friend. friends learn to forget the mistakes of others and move on. I would suggest making new friends. you don't need to apologize to her for living your life. live your life and let her live hers. there are plenty of other people out there to be friends with.
2006-08-21 02:31:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to explain yourself to your friends.. cos if they require explainations, they aren't your friends!
tell your friend that you really want to start afresh. But if she/he doesn't hold the same opinion, just let things as they are. if he/she is a true friend, she/he will come back to u!
all the best1
2006-08-21 02:29:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
she is kinda being immature...um find some new friends and just wait and see if she ever tries to get ahold of you, so that in the end u make new friends even if she never does get back in touch...
2006-08-21 02:48:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok so you matured before her asnd now its time to find more mature friends that work for a living too. if she can't understand that you WORK , well it was time for her to move on too
2006-08-21 02:30:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well,find time on weekend.take her to a dinner and have long nuice chat.everything would be ok.tell her bout your prob and why u cant make it some stimes.
2006-08-21 02:27:04 · answer #8 · answered by krrish_da_savour 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yah i know how that feels they put you on a deep guilt trip and make you feel like sh*t but just move on and let go
2006-08-21 05:44:27 · answer #9 · answered by OkieOk 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋