I hate the college I go to, I am a junior, I hate the people that go to it. They are all snobby and think they are all that. I was the loner kid in highschool, no friends of any kind, really. Its only been the past two years in college where I actualy had some friends, 2, to be exact. But I still dont feel a connection to them. I think I am realy ugly. Everyone acts surprise when I tell them my age, they say I look 16. Am I destined a life of unhappiness?
2006-08-20 15:50:07 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Don't feel alone. A lot of people feel like this. Even the ones that seem to have so many friends. Trust me. Your life has not been worthless.
2006-08-20 15:56:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off there are really good answers here so think them over. I'll be honest life is a little lonely sometimes. Throughout my life i have been the kid who is hung out with everyone, popular, unpopular, weird, whatever, never had any real friends ether so i know where your coming from. I had a couple kids i was close with and after high school i sometimes talk to them but only because i call. I got a girlfriend at the end of soft more year and she was the greatest thing, i spent all the time i could with her because i realized that everyone else i knew weren't really friends at all. Well she broke up with me and i to am alone, I'm going to school again in a few weeks, but I'm not going to look for friends, its for me and my life. Things are really hard rate now, and i don't know your situation, but i pay for everything i have, i work and go to school and i have know clue whether I'm making the right career or life decisions, I'm really confused to. You just have to learn to not worry so much, go down your path because that's what you know and be happy with it, i know its really hard, just learn and develop and be happy with whats happening, because that's all you can do. THE POINT, you just need to find anything that makes you feel good or worth being for. It doesn't even matter what it is, anything, work the crap out of yourself and know you've accomplished something, build Lego's, write a book, play a game A LOT. It doesn't matter, there are many ways to meet people and i know that's way easier said than done, just don't be afraid. Another thing, don't feel alone million of people feel the same way you do, that's not really positive but its the truth, i feel the same way you do alot of the time, but you just have to go down your path, and do things that give purpose along the way. Hey don't be afraid, if you want give me a holler.
2006-08-20 16:45:08 · answer #2 · answered by Swansen 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey.. I am 19 also and have the same problem.. I have had friends in high school but not since then.. Every time I think I'm getting close to someone something happens, they move, I move, they betray me, they just go weird all of a sudden. I cry alot because I get very lonely and down on myself.. I feel like such a loser.
I have the same problem people say I look 15 or 16 ugh. It's hard to hear that because I feel way older than even my realy age of 19. I've been on my own since 17, graduated hs early, moved, worked since 17, and am getting married next year. So it's like a double insult when people think im 15. I went with my boyfriends Mom to get my hair done and they were all shocked they thought I was her 13 year old daughters friend!! And she was like no this is my daughter-in-law.. they looked at me all shocked like WHAT??? How old is she???
Where do you live ? We should be friends.
2006-08-20 16:15:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not destined for a life of unhappiness.
College is not all it's cracked up to be- I didn't particularly care for it. However, you NEED it because an education is very important. An education can create MUCH more happiness than any college experience can. Besides, an education lasts a lifetime, while college experiences eventually become unimportant and many are even completely forgotten!
So, relax and focus on your schooling. Try to be friendly and to get to know people, but if nothing comes of it it's not the end of the world. You might wind up down the road in a great job with great friends because of your education!
2006-08-20 15:59:40 · answer #4 · answered by dpfw16 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry about any of that, been going through almost the exact same thing over the past couple years, but the thing is there's still so much more ahead, so many years, so much more happiness still to come, you're just looking for it in the wrong places I guess. Take a chance, do something that makes YOU HAPPY, if you start living life for you, then you'll find the right friends who are real and you connect, college is hell, but if you do it to get the job that you want, it'll be worth it in the end, when the reward is a job that makes you happy. Everyone has a destiny, but not all the pages are filled in, you have to improvise and help shape and create the rest of your destiny.
2006-08-20 15:58:20 · answer #5 · answered by leogirl376 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok well dont worry about being a loner in college. That fact that you have 2 friends is pretty impressive since people dont go to college to make friends. They go to school, and they go home. or to work. People that are in school all day you should worry about for the are extreamly lonely, but look making friends is easy. First and formost, get involeved in some type of activity. Let it be extra curricular. Volunteer or something. Here you will make friends for sure. People will start saying hi to you and talking to you. Its the key. I am a junior too and I feel like that someitmes too. I know another thing you could do, you could start goinng to the gym. I am not very attractive myself, but getting bigger and stronger sure helps my self esteem and people will notice this in you, and you will be able to make even more friends. Looks are not everything. Look at all the pretty girls with the ugly fat guys they are with or the ugly yellow eyes thugs they get with. Looks are kinda worthless, its just how you feel about yourslef. Also go run at the park or play basketball at the park, usually the same people go and you willl make friends there for sure.
2006-08-20 15:59:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you don't fit in because you're just more unique than everyone else. Have you ever considered that?? Sometimes it's lonely at the top!!
I think you also need to focus on what YOU like about yourself rather than worrying about what everyone else thinks. I know that's difficut. Try to consciously think of two great things you've done in a day and two aspects of yourself that you like. I bet in a week, you'll find you're more comfortable in your own skin.
It sounds like you have two friends though. Who says that your not anyone without 5 or 10 or any other given number of friends? Sometimes, it's nicer to spend time with real friends and not clutter your life with acquaintances that don't really care for you.
Lastly, take the time to think about who you are and what your interests are. At college, there is an array of clubs and associations you can try out. Try out a bunch. If you don't like one, try another. Perhaps you'll find a couple people that you can at least share one important interest with. It's worth a try and it's better than being miserable. Make a move towards change.
2006-08-20 16:10:22 · answer #7 · answered by K 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not change and do not be unhappy a wise woman once said if when you die you can count up to 5 friends good true ones that is you have been blessed. Acquaintances come and go. Do good in college, excel in finding job believe me pick your friends carefully for they will knock your doors down to get to know you when you are a success. Remember the friends you have stick with you now are your friends 2 true friends is a blessing:-)
2006-08-20 16:44:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not alone with these feelings.. so many of us have gone through the very same thing. Happiness is homemade.. you need to be happy with who you are as a person. Maybe begin to do some volunteer work.. focus on others for a bit.
Sweetie, you're only going to be 20
I don't think you have quite found your niche` in life.. but learn to enjoy the journey that leads you in it's direction. One day at a time.. maybe even just one hour at a time..
Life does get better..
2006-08-20 16:03:44 · answer #9 · answered by sassy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, I think that you have low self esteem. What you need to know is people don't always look at looks. This sounds cheesy, but maybe you should try to chat with people on the net. You can build your confidence because you can learn how to have conversations with people without being concience of your looks. Remember, having two good friends is better than having twenty fake ones. Hope this helps...and never think of life as unhappy. Everyone has their challenges in life and this one is yours.
2006-08-20 16:02:45 · answer #10 · answered by Jenn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋