recently i lied to my wife. there was this friend (female also my ex) of mine who tried to break my wife and i up, and was just causing trouble, my wife didnt want me having any contact with this woman. but i still did and lied to my wife about it like big lies that carried on for a year my wife then caught me out and my mate(who was helping me sneak around) as well as my ex told her everything. and now shes hurting so bad and i want to make it up to her im scared she'll take the kids and leave. i love her and want to make it up to her. but dont know how plz any advice would be appreciated.
2006-08-20 15:20:09 · 16 answers · asked by soloman 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
ok i didnt cheat we were just being friends. my wife didnt care we were friends until this girl wanted more. and the thing is my wife did kick me out for lying and gave me a chance to come clean but i didnt, until i got caught
2006-08-20 15:39:20 · update #1
Just tell her with all honesty that you've realized how wrong you were to tell her lies but that you will now change because you love her so much and your kids. Ask for her forgiveness. Let her see your sincerity in your eyes and when she does forgive you, you should be true to your commitment.
From then on, be a more loving, caring, and concerned husband and dad. Your wife will see all those changes and she will have peace in her heart knowing that her husband really loves them. And don't ever mention again the name of your ex because that may only remind her of the hurting that she had during those bad times. And if ever she is the one who mentiions her name, just seal her lips with a kiss and she will know what you mean by that.
Always remember that temptations are all around you but just think of your happy family which may be broken just because of lust. Lust is a second away from broken families but true love is something that everyone can treasure forever. So, if your love for your family is true, let lust pass you by without even glancing at it.
2006-08-20 15:37:42 · answer #1 · answered by Ruzzo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think lying to your wife repeatedly and for so long can be "made up" with a single or series of gestures or good deeds. I think you have broken her trust and trust is something that needs to be built up again. Trust also impacts so many other facets of a relationship. I think you need to find out why you feel the need to lie to your wife?? I think the answer to this question might reveal a deeper issue that lies within you. Perhaps you and your wife could seek therapy. Would she be willing? I think it's important to discover how you can put an end to the lies and how you both really feel about the issue but also your relationship, in general.
2006-08-20 15:44:10 · answer #2 · answered by K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you didnt cheat, but trust me lying isn't good either. You are going to have to work extra hard to get her trust back. you will have to earn MAJOR brownie points and it could take A LOT of time and energy. You should respect her enough to listen when she asked you not to hang with the woman. Why would you hang with a woman that wanted more, on the other woman's side she probably thought she was getting closer to having a chance with you. I would have freaked if i were your wife. You have a lot of work ahead of you, flowers, begging, flower, more begging. let her know how much you love her and you will probably have to prove to her you can be trusted again. Good luck.
2006-08-20 17:35:45 · answer #3 · answered by thedreamer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is so weird how everyone seems to have similar problems. I did ask my ex -husband to stop socializing with one of his girlfriends. He didin't listen. He ended up making booty calls to her on a regular basis. Still is. He didn't value me then. I don't think you value your wife either. We ask simple things of you men because we can sense trouble. Why don't you listen. Now you must do everything in your power to prove to her you are worth all of the heartache & pain that you put her through. Counseling, honesty, romantic dates. Regaining her trust. Being the man you should have been. If you love her you would do all of these things & more.
2006-08-20 15:34:25 · answer #4 · answered by mari 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OH MY GOD what is wrong with you men. I mean we give you chances upon chances to do the right thing and this is how you act. Dude you have some serious issues. You need some serious help with those issues. Get a life. Women are humans and not doormats. Get the difference? Figure it out freak. And if she leaves you. Hehehehe you deserve it.
Sorry no mercy from me.
2006-08-20 15:47:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your some kind of sh**! You say you loved her but looked what you did to her and your children, its unethical my dear and if i were in her place i ask some space.teach you a lesson!I give you your freedom and hoping that youll realize what if she's the one that do thing for you.What would be reaction. BUT, if your wife really loves you that much, she will go back and stick with you, give you a second chance.And you should ask forgiveness with all your heart.
2006-08-20 15:31:14 · answer #6 · answered by richel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, you never should have lied. Now the trust is gone. If she felt uneasy with you and your ex being friends, you should have respected her enough to leave the past behind. Now, she is sitting there wondering what else you have lied to her about. Been there. You will be one lucky man if she doesn't leave. Best bet, come clean with everything......
2006-08-20 15:27:26 · answer #7 · answered by Gary 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Discover how to get your ex back with simple text message: http://getyourexback.checkhere.info
Many girls break up with their significant others, is because they need time to figure things out. Don't take it personally, if you want her back, you have to show her you can help her. If you love her then you'll let her go, that's it. Not everybody who you date in high school you end up staying with, the chances are extremely unlikely. So if she doesn't want to, then you need to let her go.
2014-10-24 10:43:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you loved her why did you cheat? You know what if you love her you should know how to prove it. Weather its taking her out to dinner and geting on you knee to ask hert to renew your vows so you can start over or just taking a walk in the park to talk about it. Just do what you know will make her happy. Believe me you can do it.
2006-08-20 15:28:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...if you had been spending the time on your wife that you were spending with this so called friend....then you wouldnt be asking this question, and you wouldnt be worried if she was going to leave and take the kids now would you?
2006-08-20 16:57:53 · answer #10 · answered by Elly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋