Seriously - no amount of asking, cajoling etc. will help... he always just wants to eat at home.... he can cook etc. (yes I appreciate that) but sometimes I want to get out of our stupid apartment and enjoy a nice dinner out someplace... My dad took us out sometimes and it was so nice... My husband is an f'ing foreigner too by the way (i.e. not raised in the U.S.) - he's great as in cooking, getting my car maintained, doing his own laundry etc. but I just cannot stand not being able to go out anywhere!!!! I am seriously thinking of joining Arthur Murray or something to keep learning Latin dancing (without my husband of course) and also thinking of joining some kind of "restaurant-goers" club or something (if there is any such thing...). I am pretty religious so cheating on him is out of the question but sometimes I regret my decision.... not to mention that, had I listened to my dad and married another American-born desi, chances are we'd be a lot better off financially....
2006-08-20 12:58:42 · 12 answers · asked by Mishy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We are both just over 30 (I'm 30 and he's 32) but I feel like life is just passing us by... We live in the Metro Detroit area so there are so many nice restaurants.... and I can't go to any of them unless it's with people from work.... I feel like such a loser because my husband is such a moron.... and refuses to go anywhere.... what the f is wrong with him?! He's Muslim so eats halal etc. (I'm Christian) but he used to take me out before.... Even with the allegations surrounding the La Shish owners, I would be open to going there, just to be able to do something! We have enough money and everything! I just don't think he's gives a rat's a$$ about me -- plain and simple..... I just feel so sorry for myself now.... the only way I can go on anything resembling a date is: driving 2 hours to where my dad lives, having him take me to this nice chinese place where they have a piano player, etc. and then having to drive home because he is too drunk....
2006-08-20 13:03:12 · update #1
also, he NEVER wants to make love anymore - I am too proud to initiate etc. and plus we go to bed so late etc.... when I mention it calmly etc. in the living room etc. he's always like "well I've been working so much etc. etc." -- I'm sorry but I am not f'ing impressed! Yeah - he works late selling mortgages (similar to being an f'ing used car salesman) while I am in financial consulting at a premier firm in the area....My dad was right - I should have married some kind of Indian doctor or engineer etc.....
2006-08-20 13:07:14 · update #2
Good point Emi - well today when he refused to even go to f'ing Sunday brunch with me after I came home from church and from working out -- I just realized that I am so f'ing sick of all of this! It's not just the restaurant thing - he does not go ANYWHERE with me!!! Why is it that EVERY SINGLE TIME I propose to go anywhere (and I mean anywhere -- for example I am a huge fan of just hanging out at Barnes and Noble) -- anyway EVERY SINGLE F'ING TIME I say "hey - let's go do ______ " -- I get "....no.... you go ahead....."!!! I know I am fat but I am still pretty enough to be seen in public with, for God's sake!
2006-08-20 13:11:35 · update #3
Im sorry. He sounds like a loner and thats no fun. I hope yall resolve this and if not, find a guy that you are more compatable with.
2006-08-20 13:04:36 · answer #1 · answered by TexasCowboy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you letting everyone else run your life? This is the USA. If you want to go to a restaurant, get some friends from church or neighbors or family together and go to a restaurant. You don't have to cheat on your husband and you don't have to regret marrying the wrong person. Just get some friends together, start a "Thursday Night Dinner Club" and go out once a month. It's not necessary to spend a fortune on dinner, or get drunk, or dance the night away with someone. All you want is some company and to have someone else to talk to. Just do it and start taking control of your life.
2006-08-20 13:10:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what, I have a problem that is similar. When I was dating my husband, we ate out all the time. We would go to fancy places for lunch and dinner we would dress up and we would always drop about $300 for an upscale meal. Granted my husband is a an amazing cook and everything he makes or creates is delicious. I think it is a married thing because for us it is not financial because my husband has a an amazing well paid job.
2006-08-24 07:44:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a Christian, you need to learn to be more submissive to your husband. Maybe I will get a lot of flack for this but why is it that important for you to go to a nice restuarant. I guess I just don't understand how that would cause you such distress, discord, and resentment towards your husband...? There is obvious more to this story. Maybe you ought to take a good look at yourself before you start pointing out the faults of others.
2006-08-20 13:08:03 · answer #4 · answered by Emi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband also hates eating out. He has a lot of anxiety issues and he's just not comfortable being in a crowded place like that.so maybe once a year is what I get, we might go to the movies twice a year. Your a big girl go alone, go with co-workers or girlfriends. Considering cheating on your husband because he won't go out to eat? Are you serious? It sounds like your the insensitive, inconsiderate, selfish one one! Maybe if you stopped harassing him about it he might do it to surprise you! And pulling out the ethnic card? How ignorant are you? Lets see a muslim doesn't want to to eat a bar with a bunch of drunk Americans...kinda sounds smart to me. I started out feeling like I understood you, but I don't speak spoiled brat.
2006-08-20 13:14:28 · answer #5 · answered by ghostchaser.christy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like they have an really screwed up existence. Now he's attempting to make up for lost time and she is taking section in the interest. in reality she's an grownup and his prevalent jobs inclusive of tending to the more youthful children are far more desirable significant. you want to make him comprehend that! Secondly he's incorrect if he's no longer protecting you which includes her. you're his spouse and should be known with dignity and note of. Her problem is he hasn't made her conscious of what sort of individual you're that caused him to marry you. you're literally not the rationalization behind the divorce, so she has no reason to be bitter adversarial to you. in case you and your children do not get a visit then there is now way i might want to fund theirs. you want to save you funds become independent from his and by no skill fund issues that do not comprise you and your children. do not problem about what she thinks!
2016-11-26 20:27:25 · answer #6 · answered by kokal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he say WHY he won't go out to eat? Could it be because he is worried that someone will do something to his food? My ex husband was terrified of germs. He would rarely go out to eat.
Frankly I think there are bigger problems in your relationship besides just the dining out issue. Maybe you need to think about what is going on in your life and ask yourself if this is where you want to be 10 years from now. Get him involved. Try to work this thing out.
2006-08-20 13:12:32 · answer #7 · answered by Sabina 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is sad. Im sorry to hear this. Sorry, but I have to be honest with you. I think your biggest mistake was marrying a muslim, if you are a Christian. Do you know (well obviously you do) how different they are...beliefs, live styles, etc. He probably hates your spirituality! Not a good mix. What do you have in common?
2006-08-20 13:11:00 · answer #8 · answered by Author Al 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I didn't have the same problem you do but to answer your question: my husband would only eat at certain restaurants. He was a policeman and had a hang up about someone "messing" with his meal. So we either went out of town to eat or only in one local restaurant.
2006-08-20 13:10:36 · answer #9 · answered by cat lady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you fat and ugly and he does not want to be seen with you in public, have you let yourself go and get fat and just want to go out to eat all the time . many women are fat lushes after marraige and let their body get all flabby and gross and why would and man wan to have sex with someone like that .
2006-08-20 14:21:21 · answer #10 · answered by DAVID G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋