I was with my boyfriend for two years,my family was never happy with him which caused friction. we were going through a rough patch and figured a holiday was what we needed. Unfortunately it went from bad to worst. To a point where all the trust I ever had for him was lost. We broke up not long after that. I've been through the I hate his guts stage. He's now calling me and texting me. I think I'm falling for him again, but all the problems and friction and the hurt. I just can't deal with it again. should I say goodbye ?
2006-08-20 12:20:24 · 89 answers · asked by lost 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Leave it in the past where it belongs if you know what's good for u.Going back never seems to end happily for anyone
2006-08-20 12:24:53 · answer #1 · answered by twinkle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SAY GOODBYE!!!!!
Relationships never work on 2nd time round!
Change your mobile number so he cant bother you no more.
Dont give him a second chance! I know the pain hurts but in the end you'll come out smilng.
I know from experience from a girl dumping me years ago and then she saw me in a bus going home from work.
She thought the spark was there so did i and we met up and went to cinema and soon afterwards i felt this isnt right!
I didnt sleep well thinking about the future that wouldnt be right and i didnt want to be with the girl so i dumped her.
There would be too many bad memories for you my dear so i suggest you start afresh with a new guy and hopefully feel better more loved and indeed very happy.
The guy whose texting and calling you is in danger of harrassing you and he's desperate to get back with you but whats to say in a few months or even weeks or days you'll be hurt by him again?
Is it worth it?
Only you can answer that one!
Good luck
2006-08-27 14:39:58 · answer #2 · answered by stevenjohnevans 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart darling and you should know that a good relationship or should I say a successful relationship is made up two very forgiving people. Think about what you want out of the relationship and if it worth the trouble, if its not then move on but if it is, give it one more chance. Whatever decision u make, never ever have regrets. In these situations there is usually no wrong or right decision, just decisions so its really is up to you. Think of five years from now, will you look back and say, I shud have given him another chance or will you say, it was all good I put it behind me and choose the path you wanna follow. All the best!!!
2006-08-27 14:30:42 · answer #3 · answered by babyphat20 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, exes are good at that, just as you're getting your life back together they get in touch with a "how r u? x" text. If you take him back what will have changed? Do you think he will be different? Will you be able to trust him again? I'm presuming he cheated on you in some way on holiday. Your family want you to be happy and they can see this guy has the opposite effect. They're the ones that were there for you when this guy disappeared into the sunset. If your best mate was in this situation what would you say to her? I think most of us have experienced this and although it's flattering my advice would be to stay away from your ex and not to enter into a phone/text conversation with him. You deserve better, don't spend another 2 years on him, there's a guy out there who'll appreciate you and treat you right. Be strong.
2006-08-27 11:21:00 · answer #4 · answered by Runnerbean 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is your life and the choices you make in it, are your responsibility. If you are happy with him, then thats all that matters.....Your family werent in love with him, so its very hard for someone to know how another really feels. The questions you need to ask yourself - does this man make you happy? If he makes you happy 50% of the time, then it wont work....If he makes you happy 95% of the time, then it probably will work. The ball is in your court. You dont have to accept unacceptable behaviour from anyone. Your needs are just as important as anyone else. The thing with love though, it is very hard to see logic. What you need to realise, that this man is not the only man you will ever love. When you least expect it, love will find you again, but maybe next time he will be worthy of your love, and it will be an equal relationship. Sounds to me like your ex boyfriend only had his own interests at heart. You are better than that....you have your own needs to think about too.
2006-08-27 16:53:37 · answer #5 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because of how you describe what's going on, and if you feel it's like 'I can't live with him and I can't live without him', i.e. flattering, intensly emotionally satisfying, distant, hurtful, terrible all over again ..and again ..which will likely be intensified with your family's opinions being invoved too ..
please buy this book and hurry up and read it before you fall for him a 2nd time. 'Facing Love Addiction' by Pia Mellody.
Interesting insight into people who are strongly drawn to eachother, but because both need different levels of intimacy, both end up hurting each other.
On top of this, if you know from experience you can't trust him ... why would you again? You can only justify trying again with him if you can risk (i.e. have the inner emotional strength to) taking the possible pain again, should history repeat itself. And only you can be the judge of that. If you don't have this strength at the moment (sounds like you don't), you need to protect yourself first by allowing yourself time and distance from him to heal the wounds to your heart from your last 'encounter' with this guy.
Or if you really don't know what to do, why not try honesty. Put him on hold by saying you liked him a lot, but don't feel you have the strength at the moment to enter into another relationship with him, because you are worried the bad things will just happen all over again. You need a break of 6 months to get over what happened between you. Then go away, forget about him and get on with your life!
You can always re-evaluate 6 months down the line how you feel again. Right?
2006-08-28 08:16:40 · answer #6 · answered by Soul999 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you should get back him personally. I believe that once a relationship has lost all the trust then things can never be the same. I have tried to mend relationships when the trust is gone and its not something that can be done easily. It often takes a lot of time and sometimes the trust can never be recovered. I think it is time to move on and find someone that you can trust. dont let him get into your head, its ot worth the hassle.
2006-08-24 11:56:13 · answer #7 · answered by haunted_angel85 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You basically answered your own question. Do you go back to him and go through the hurt and the friction all over again? It would be so easy to let love get the best of you. You need to remember though sometimes love just is not enough.
2006-08-20 12:49:29 · answer #8 · answered by Chipper33 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely say good bye.
If he is texting and calling, then he knows that he messed up. That further translates that you will have no problem moving on or finding someone else.
Too many women make the mistake of going back. I am focusing on the trust part - if that's gone, then you really shouldn't go back.
Good Luck!
2006-08-28 08:49:48 · answer #9 · answered by Jabo the Wise 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DONT DO IT!!!!!!!!!!! In the past it caused a lot of friction and you say you lost all trust in him, well when trust is gone nothing can get it back... whats worse is, if you gave it/him another chance any arguement in the future will always bring up the past. Move on and find a guy worthy of your trust, respect and love.......
2006-08-27 23:44:05 · answer #10 · answered by mr_scotsguy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should say goodbye don't you? Best leave it as it is - you've been there and done it. Move on now it will always be the same. You may get on for a week or two but it will go back to normal. Forget it and say goodbye, don' waste your time.
2006-08-25 09:25:39 · answer #11 · answered by Curious39 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋