Wehave a lot of problems, but he doesn't seen to see them...I feel like he is not interestet in me. He works at home most of the time but he spend long hours in the computer and in his blackberry... for the time he comes t bed I'm already asleep.... We both have children from diferent marriages. When his son come to visit is like he forget about me... and if I look something to do (like paint, or go to my sister's) he compliens, he want me around even is he isn't paying attention to me. Theres more, but is too long, I jus ask him for separation and he went to the movies...I aleady took the decition, I just want to know if I would be ok...Thanks..
2006-08-20 11:35:00 · 11 answers · asked by None 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
SURE honey, you'll be just fine, but let me just say this: it sounds like you love him, if you do, then would you try to stay and make it work if he tired harder? I ask because, My husband owns his own company, never has time for me, but seems to have time for everyone else, i would tell him and tell him i'm not happy, PLEASE show me more attention, and he too just wouldn't get it. One day I told him we had to talk, I turned the computer off and unplugged it, same with the t.v and the phone (house and cell). We sat down and i told him when you don't have time for me it makes me feel like i'm no one to you,,etc,,etc i cryed and said what i had to say. I didn't yell, which i've done in the pass, i didn't cuse, i didn't make him the only one in the wrong, but i told him, this is how it makes me feel when you do such and such or this is how it makes me feel when you don't do such and such, and then i asked him do you love me? and gave him time to answer, how does it make you feel when i tell you that your actions are causing me pain? We talk a long time that night and it opened his eyes, little by little. I love my husband and never want to divorce, but when he doesn't give me the love and affection that i need i feel like well i'm not going to fight for a marriage that he isn't willing to work on too, but he just needs reminding, i'm a very indepent person, i won't ask for anything, first i will try to do it for myself and you may be the same way and our men take advantage of that,they think oh my wife is fine, she said she needs attention, but it's just her hormones. That's men for you. I'm not trying to talk you into staying, i just want to make sure that you have tried everything to save your marriage, because i may be wrong, but i think that you want to be with your husband you just need him to be more of a husband.
If you are done with the marriage, then good for you to know what you want and to go after it. There will be times where you may feel weak or alone, but GOD is always with you and he is strong enough to help you throw anything and he will never leave you alone. I don't usually write so much..........GOOD LUCK
2006-08-20 12:11:27 · answer #1 · answered by angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as this is your decision then you will be fine. You already knew what it was you wanted and you went for it. Making these type of decisions will give you what you need to go out on your own and make it work.
It sounds like your husband is having some real emotional issues and does not know how to deal with them so disappearing is easier. It sounds as if he does love you but there is a problem sitting in between the both of you. Only you could figure it out as to the other problems you are having.
I would go for the separation and then just take your time. You have what it takes to make it and there are many agencies to help you if you need it. Good Luck
2006-08-20 18:05:14 · answer #2 · answered by Tweek 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you made the right decision already. If youre happier outside this relationship then you definitely made the right one and you will ok. It may not be easy but its got to be better than what you have now. Theres no reason for staying in a one-sided relationship nowadays. Maybe a little time apart is exactly what you two need. It will show him what hes about to lose, and maybe he ll realize it before its too late. If it doesnt then youre headed in the right direction. Good luck
2006-08-20 11:46:59 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, dont positioned something in writing inclusive of that. A crafty felony specialist can rip to shreds each be conscious adversarial to you. Divorce makes use of regulation. regulation is diverse than authentic existence. believe me. (think he had a more desirable helpful job and also you reported take the youngsters for some months til i'm getting settled for a sturdy position for them. If he desirous to bypass for custody, the regulation might want to note of you/that as abandonment) see how authentic existence and regulation are diverse? of direction he doesnt want divorce and is hoping you're literally not severe or that you'll replace your concepts. Makes no distinction which, its nevertheless an same outcome. From what you wrote, definite, you would possibly want to ought to assert, i'm sorry, i want a divorce. One be conscious: did you're saying vows in the front of God? If definite, then it became God that joined you. God's provision of divorce basically is on the grounds of infidelity. once you made love at the same time you bodily became "one". If neither of you dedicated adultery, then that "oneness", that covenant (contract) with God that He blessed you with, has no longer been damaged. God can fix the affection between a husband and spouse, quite. i desire you'll evaluate this and counselling previously you divorce. that is a lengthy be apologetic about in case you dont. Weigh it intently. and each and each be conscious you reported-i have been there.-yet I mean what I say about God too-because He did for me. **************************************... You further files at the same time as i became writing. basically DONT positioned something IN WRITING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... you would possibly want to finally end up with 0.5 a house. regulations...
2016-11-26 20:20:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I so understand you. I am also asking my husband for a divorce.
He has done porn. He has been abusive. When he left for work and i kissed him he turned his head.
This is the second time i left him and he is always going to change.
Now i am filled with guilt. How could i do this to my family?
Does your happiness really matter.
We need to work thru this together along with all the other woman who have been thru this.
We need some sort of support group so that we will know we will be ok. You see i know you will be ok.
I just dont know about me
2006-08-20 11:50:52 · answer #5 · answered by twobjill 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a separation would do both of you some good. He can decide if he wants to pay attention to you and be your husband. You can decide if you are ready to live on your own.
2006-08-20 11:41:11 · answer #6 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are going to be JUST fine! Pack his bags and have them ready for hm when he gets back from the movies.
Good luck, Hon.
2006-08-20 12:09:23 · answer #7 · answered by Gothic Martha™ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u will be fine and u desrve to be happy and u should be respected and showed attention by ur husband so ur doing the right thing every1 deserves to be happy and u'll be fine
2006-08-20 11:41:10 · answer #8 · answered by khadeeja 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seperation grows the heart fonder. try counseling. don't decide divorce based on lack of attention. you may regret it.
2006-08-20 11:45:47 · answer #9 · answered by kerik 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you will be fine honey don not worry, ive a similer problem with my husband but i no that I will find a way and that it will all be fine
2006-08-20 11:40:31 · answer #10 · answered by sweetlikehoney_73 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋