Do parents expectations encourage children to do their best or discourage them by setting them up for failure?
2006-08-20 10:21:57 · 23 answers · asked by Richard C 1 in Education & Reference ➔ Homework Help
dont punish them just use the incentive way it will work with them because they still young and not be able to make defrenciate between right and wrong
Children are not born knowing how to be well behaved. They need help and guidance from parents and other careers - and as all parents know this isn't always an easy job
Talking to other parents with children of the same age it may work and help u
Children learn that they get attention by doing things parents don't like.
A better way to encourage good behavior is to remember to praise them as often. This doesn't mean never reprimanding them for doing something wrong. But it's important to criticize the child's behaviour rather than the child as a person. Instead of saying, "You are very naughty", say something like, "I don't like what you're doing", or, "We won't allow that behavior".
Set limits for your child
Let children know what behavior is allowed and what isn't. Setting limits makes them feel secure. Be consistent about what is and what isn't acceptable.
2006-08-20 10:34:28 · answer #1 · answered by micho 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WEll with the right encouragement, most kids do better. But if the bar is set so high the kids will be afraid of failing and have problems in school.
Which was what happened to me. I'm pretty smart, always done well.. but then my mom started expecting WAY too much out of me.. if I got a 90 on my report card my mom wanted mom, would go to the school to see my grades and gave me a lecture on how I needed to brings my grades up and how I should work harder.
But if given the right encouragement.. (and that's the word I mean..) kids will do better. Parents should encourage thier kids, help them, stay behind them.. but don't make them make them feel like a failure if they don't bring home the highest grades possible.
They should just tell the children that you are glad that they tried thier hardest and if that is the grade they get from trying hard, then that's ok with them. If they weren't trying to do the best.. then she should just suggest that the kids work a little harder next time.
That's the best thing I know to tell some one. but understand this is coming from a person that does not have children and has never raised a child..But I presume, if I did have children this is how I would handle things.
Hope this helps!
-Jasmine
2006-08-20 17:55:03 · answer #2 · answered by allyouwishfour 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both can happen.
I think it's important to be realistic, and know that not all children are capable of doing as well as others. Never being satisfied, no matter how hard the child is trying... that is very discouraging to children. On the other hand, shrugging off poor grades that are obviously not as well as the child could do... that's a failure to motivate your children. And that will allow them to accept failure in life as inevitable.
We have to hit that happy medium, and it's a delicate balance.
2006-08-20 17:31:06 · answer #3 · answered by mia2kl2002 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some parents expectations are good and offer encouragement to the child but the parents that already have the childs future planned for them and expect them to succeed is usually failure
2006-08-20 17:32:19 · answer #4 · answered by jlthomas75844 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends. Sometimes parents pressure their children way too much. Children either crack under the pressure, rebel, or actually do a good job (depends on the child as well).
As long as parents are positive with their children, encourage them to do their best, and don't make it seem like it's the end of the world and that they'll be very disappointed if their child doesn't succeed...
2006-08-20 17:29:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anastasia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sets them up for failure. As a parent, I expect my kids to do the best they can, but in what, I have no expectations. This is for them to decide,not me. I encourage them and help when I can, but it is not my place to tell them what to do with thier life. My one daughter has her heart set on bieng a lawyer, the other is happy bieng a housewife, so long as they are both happy in their life courses, is all I need to be concerned with. Parents who try to live the life they wanted through thier kids, only set them up for failure.
2006-08-20 17:29:31 · answer #6 · answered by psycmikev 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Expectations should be based on the child. If you are setting them appropriately then they can only encourage. The problem comes when parents set unrealistic expectations. When it comes to school parents should feel free to talk to teachers about appropriate expectations.
2006-08-20 17:29:17 · answer #7 · answered by skippy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that parents just want their kids to have the best in life, so they encourage them to do their best, now whether the encourage ment its discouraging or not depends on how the kid looks at it...Like for instance, my mom encourages me to be a doctorm even though that's not really my dream, I still take it as encouragement, because i know that she just wants the best for me.
2006-08-20 17:30:56 · answer #8 · answered by fuzzy19 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the goals are reasonable and obtainable, I would say that they encourage the kids. If they are way out of reach, they are setting their kids up for failure and should start by setting smaller goals and work up.
2006-08-20 17:28:28 · answer #9 · answered by Mariposa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends, mine only encouraged me! Try NOT to set your kids up for failure, because it WILL damage them in the long run.
2006-08-20 17:27:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋