Should I be a friend still or not? Is my friend using me?

Question

She's 9 mths pregnant and the baby' father has not brought anything for her and has been going from her back to his 7 year relationship partner. Feeling sorry for her after he left recently I brought her ALOT of baby stuff and talked on the phone w/ her alot to ease her pain. But not the father has come back again and she act like she to busy to talk when I call and he will be a better man. I spent alot of money and the father brought not 1 thing. She I just stop worrying about her and let her get what she deserve? That's just messed up to me. She's only a friend when he leaves her.

Answer 1

u say she is only a friend when he isn't there?...well ummmm, then she isn't a friend at all....all she is..is a user....stop worrying about her..she needs to step up and worry about herself..trust me i had a friend just like her..i was always there for her..and now she doesnt even speak to me..she was never there for me...so you are far better off without this friend.

Answer 2

i don't think u should stop bein friends wit her....i'm mean yeah...she may have made a mistake wit that guy but u kno what i think??? maybe she's a lil bit confused on what she should do or is feelin insecure....if the father isn't doin anything for her and she is by herself...don't u think she would need someone to help her and be a good friend???? it seems like u are doin that so why not continue to be a good friend??? ur just tryin to show her that u really care....have u tried talkin to her bout how u feel and the situation she's in?? maybe if u let her know what ur feelin she'll tell u how she's really feelin.....i hope this helped a lil and that everythin works out for the best....oh and i think that the father is a piece of crap if he keeps leavin her especially if she's pregnant and he keeps goin back to his other partner...he needs to step up and face reality and accept the responsibility of becomin a father.....sorry....just had to say that!!!

Answer 3

FIrst of all.. I understand you bought her stuff because you wanted to, but do not mix up the fact you bought stuff for her and her baby as meaning that she owes you anything (relationship wise) I know you care, that is obvious, however she is adamant on believing that the father will come back. There is nothing you can do here, except be her friend if thats what you choose to be. She has to see all of this for herself. She is only kidding herself if she thinks this man will come back for her. But she will have to figure that one out on her own. No, I dont think she is using you. She didnt ask for you to buy her things (from what you wrote) You cannot buy love. You cannot buy friendship. Money here is simply worthless. Choose to be whatever you desire in this picture... but dont expect anything in return. Good luck.

Answer 4

why should you be out paying all the stuff for the baby. question do you have enough money on you to spend on you? if i was pregnant i would be paying for all needs for the baby and not depend on my friends to do for me. that is selfish. throw a baby-shower and don't spend anymore than what you have. second keep all reciepts that you have spend on and take the father to court. have your friend to go to child support to fill child support on the father. you go with your friend. tell the case worker what you have been doing that the father can't do. have the mother of the baby be more of a parent and let her spend her money on the baby stuff. as of you are the father of the baby. don't always pay for the fathers mistakes. he should be rewarded to pay you back. be there for your friend and don't let her control you or your money on baby stuff. in the future your friend will always look up to you for baby stuff. when child gets older, prices will get higher and you will be s.o.b.

Answer 5

Since that you are doing out of your heart, then you should feel pleased when the guy returned to her. You have already helped her during her difficult time and u did a good job. She must be too eager to clinch to him since his return and temporary neglected you. If she don't come back to you, tell yourself that at least you have done something good before. You need not to bother whether u are being used or not. Right ??

Answer 6

You sound very childish and selfish. If you buy your "friend" things for her baby, it should be because she is your "friend" and not to try to up the other man. It shouldn't matter if he is around or not if you are her friend. You can't just be there when you feel like it. You are buying stuff for the wrong reasons. You can be her friend without buying anything, just be there for her. If she continually ignores you when he is around, wash your hands of her, move on. Please learn the English language and punctuation.

Answer 7

you sound like such a nice person I almost hate to be my usual blunt self but I have to. Honey shes using you,shes living in a dream world one day her babies father is going to suddenly change. Sometimes you cant help a person,they have to learn the hard way.Find someone worthy of you. She is not it.

Answer 8

See what happens after the baby comes. If she is going to continue in this vain. Move on. Lesson learned.

Answer 9

she needs to start worry about that baby instaed trying to run after that man, she needs to start trying to work because my sister is pregnant and she works, so she need to get a job at least. she needs to realtiy and realized he ain;t coming back and he ain't no good. When she start to support hers self then oyu can start helping her out a little, buit oyu can stay friineds with her.

Answer 10

Be a friend to her anyway thats what you are there for. Let their business be their business since shes pregnant they need to work out their own issues.