me and my friend and her daughter have been sharing a home for over two years now. it is a home owned by my father and aunt. they said that we all need to be out by october because the roof will not hold for another winter. we have the oppertunity to have two different places to live but she refuses to leave me. she says she cannot survive without me. i am 23 years old and she is 42 she survived before me why not now. how do i tell her i want her to give me my own space? i want to get married and have a family.
2006-08-20 04:12:59 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
she says that i cannot survive without her and i have to be there to watch the kid that isnt mine i cannot even get a job because of this.
2006-08-20 04:23:10 · update #1
Dependent relationship are NOT good. Picture trying to save a drowning man as he is panicking. He grabs you out of fear of losing his life and starts choking you....harder and harder...The air is cut off from your lungs as he squeezes tighter around your neck. The blood is cut off from your brain. You fight him off...the more you fight the tighter he squeezes. Your head sinks below the water and everything turns black...YOU BOTH DIE!
That's the type of relationship based on dependency. Relationships should be based on choices or cooperation. NOT NEED!
2006-08-20 04:24:29 · answer #1 · answered by Laughing Man Copycat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just have to come out and be honest. She might not like it, but someone that is afraid to live on their own at that age needs a little push. She will survive.
2006-08-20 11:19:17 · answer #2 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the way i would tell her to give you your space is tell her that you love her and that you will always be her for her no matter what and that she is your best friend and tell her how you feel and say that you want to get married and have a family and you want to have your own space to get the opportunity to find the right guy for you and if she is you friend she would understand if you ever want to talk to get to know one and other and become friends my email is dab1985donbrown@yahoo.com
2006-08-20 11:28:51 · answer #3 · answered by Donald B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remove yourself on your own immediately. This 42 year old has issues that you cannot cure. She needs help. If you saddle yourself with those problems as young as you are, you are in for a lifetime of unfulfilled goals of your own. I'm sorry for her, but you have a life, too.
2006-08-20 11:19:29 · answer #4 · answered by Teacher 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell her how you are feeling. she is older, has a child, and has already experienced life. you want those same opportunities. if she can't see that and respect that, then she wasn't a friend in the first place. it sounds as if she has become dependent on you and the sooner you get away from her, the better.
2006-08-20 11:19:16 · answer #5 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to get a pet or something like that. Tell her that you want to get married and you will come back to visit her often. Is her mental health ok? If so don't provoke her to anger.
2006-08-20 11:18:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her the truth that u want to see how it is to be on ur own and u are going back to school and wont have time to watch her kids
2006-08-20 12:54:38 · answer #7 · answered by Victoria 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her like you told us....if she can't handle it...then you're better without her....you just need some space...some alone time...tell her you'll still be in her life....you'll still be a friend...just that she's strangling you.....that you need time by yourself...if she's a good friend she'll respect that and listen to you...if she doesn't then she isn't worth being around....
good luck
2006-08-20 11:18:53 · answer #8 · answered by Yogaflame 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think she want to have her own home and pay her own bills
you can let your father or aunt talk to her
2006-08-20 11:26:22 · answer #9 · answered by human 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her this. but also be very gentle and understanding. she obviously is not very stable.
2006-08-20 11:18:19 · answer #10 · answered by Jenny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋