I have gay friends that like to say hey queer, or girlfriend, or hey, he's "family". For some reason those words, or terms annoy me. Do you feel the same way?
2006-08-19 23:52:51 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Oh, and yes I am a gay male for those of you who are wondering.
2006-08-20 00:00:01 · update #1
Those slang terms also annoy me as well , I am a man and I do not enjoy being called girlfriend , queer , Blanche , or any of those slang " terms of endearment " . I am gay but gay does not define me as a whole it is my sexual identity not what I am . Some people tend to live the whole gay experience they eat sleep and breathe it . I do not for the most part I live a normal life and just happen to enjoy the company of men . I completely understand where you are coming from , I have let it be known among my gay friends not to refer to me in those terms . I has been effective for the most part once in a while they will slip and it will tick me off .
2006-08-20 04:06:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have never been called "girlfriend" except by my girlfriend, i was called "queer" once by some freak in the store, but "family" bugs me - and here is why..
personal story time~~~
I work in the civl department at my local courthouse and 3 days each week I run a "parenting apart" class for people getting a divorce. I check people in take their money for the class etc... The rule is if you don't pay by class 2 you cannot attend and must reschedule (bookkeeping purposes - not my rule) well this one girl that was getting a divorce showed up at the class the 2nd night and did not have enough money to pay the full amount, and asked me if she could attend anyway I told her no because that is the "rule". and she replied with "but we are family" in a whiney kind of voice. I looked at her and said something like - "you are no family of mine" and she said I mean "gay family" so I asked her "your assuming I am gay and that if I am you should get preferential treatment and not have to follow the rules because your gay too" at that point she got mad and stormed out of my office. She came in the next day to reschedule her class and oddly enough had the full amount in hand...
2006-08-20 03:49:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
These words do not bother me, but I do have family that is very homophobic and I cannot stand other things they say, like "I would not be seen in New Hope because that is where all the homos hang" and "oh that is so gay". I am not out to my family, but I think they know down inside, it is just painful to know they are so hateful. It is annoying at times. My cousin even went so far as to say he didn't invite any "gay" people to his wedding, well guess what?? I was invited. LOL. Anyway, I hope things get better for you, I am sorry you are having a rough time.
2006-08-20 02:55:11 · answer #3 · answered by spiritcavegrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've never been called any of those terms, but if I were in that situation, of course it'd bother me.
People should not be called anything aside from their names, or nicknames that they choose to have. Something as derogatory as the terms you listed, aside from family (which I see nothing wrong with)-- is highly insulting. It's almost as... ALMOST as horrid as the racial names that degraded different cultures. Almost as bad as chink or n*gger or beaner. I don't think ANYONE deserves to be labelled in such a manner. It's not only impolite, but offensive. You tend to not see homosexuals go down the street and call that heterosexual man a breeder, instead of his name. So why aren't homosexuals given the same liberty? The same respect?
People are idiots, so don't take offense to their words.
*edit* wait, I did not realize you said your *gay* friends said this... my thoughts on this are still the same... but... it just surprises me that they'd degrade you in such a way when they're gay themselves... I suppose if they enjoy being called those derogatory things, it'd be less offensive, as they'd see it as normal. I mean, it'd still be offensive personally, but it wouldn't be as bad because THEY don't see the harm in it and it isn't said maliciously. I'm not sure if I'm being too clear... because it feels like I'm talking in circles. But alas, it's 5 am, or nearly, so forgive me!
2006-08-20 00:33:13 · answer #4 · answered by Zyxxin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. While I'll sometimes say "family" and I sometimes use the word "queer" to mean all of us who are not straight, I don't call anybody "girlfriend.' None of these uses iritates me. I think I'd be pretty much a prissy queen if they did.
2006-08-20 01:24:37 · answer #5 · answered by michael941260 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah here where I go to school it gets on my nerves when some of the girls announce all loud "The gay community is here, yay!"
There's a few particular girls that do it. That, and there are a few who bombard the new girls and ask them if they're gay. They call themselves the "welcoming committee". It's annoying as hell and it makes us all look bad. I don't flaunt my sexuality. If people ask me, then yes I'm honest and tell them I'm gay, I talk about guys with the girls (I still find guys cute, but not in a sexual way) I joke with everyone, but with people who are closer to me, I talk to them about girls I'm attracted to and things like that. But crap like that is annoying as hell.
2006-08-20 03:46:48 · answer #6 · answered by Agent Double EL 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It annoys me because i imagine it really is this form of nick call that tries to humanise the little unelected reptilian charlatan. I a lot prefer to call him 'The Prince of Darkness', because it suits him so a lot more desirable helpful.
2016-11-26 19:35:39 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm much older now and rarely hear those terms anymore.
I think the older we get we tend to drop those sayings from our vocabulary When I was younger, the terms "girlfriend", "Blanche", "Mary", "queer", "nellie" and "family" were used a lot and it really bothered me....especially in public.
I just felt strange when they were used, and it embarrassed me.
2006-08-20 02:44:40 · answer #8 · answered by Jake 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in the right context, amongst my close gay/lesbian friends, we don't say those words a lot, but don't offend each other. we may talk about if someone else might be "family."
coming from a hateful, homophobes mouth...yes, I find it offensive. I guess some people find it offensive double-standard talk. like when black people call each other the "N" word or like when Carlos Mencia talks about "beaners."
2006-08-20 06:34:09 · answer #9 · answered by redcatt63 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah it does! its like you're being classifield and labeled when they know nothing about you. my reference to friends or strangers. i appreciate the fact that you're open mind enough to try and understand but everyone isn't the same is my point. so i'm not rude about it but will explain why i'm offended if i feel the need. maybe i'll help out the next person that feels the same!
2006-08-20 15:20:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋