My had an affair and now claims she made it all up?

Question

My wife had an affair 4 years ago when I was in jail serving out traffic warrants. I was only in for 17 days and she slept with some guy off the internet and a couple twice. Recently I read some emails of a sexual nature from a guy and I confronted her and she said she met him at a hotel and 'it was just sex, get over it'. I emailed the guy and he said he only chatted with her online and never actually met her(he was also in another state). Now she says it was just a trick to try and get me to think she was cheating and cheat myself so she could get me to stop holding her cheating while I was in jail over her head. Would you buy a story like that? Ladies are you really capable of something like that?? Just to teach a lesson??? Or is she lying out her ***?? Im not an in and out of jail kind of guy, I decided to serve it out instead of paying the fine. I live on a budget, what can I say?

My wife. oops I didnt notice the missing word.

Answer 1

You two are made for each other.

Peace.

Answer 2

Unfortunately immature women are capable of being extremely conviving and malicious.. and that is what u seem to have on ur hands.. a woman that will do anything to intentionally put u through pain.. I believe that she didnt sleep with the guy u emailed.. kinda hard if hes in another state.. i think its pretty crappy that she would stoop so low as to trick u into hating her enough to cheat.. what kind of relationship is that.. ??? When u love someone u do all that u can to avoid hurting each other.. Im sorry it sounds like ur wife is extremely miserable with herself.. and well misery loves company.. And i think even if u had cheated, i think she would of told u that she was lying just so she could throw u cheating on her in ur face.. She sounds like a very hateful, selfish person, that will stop at nothing to hurt u.. I think she needs some psychiatric help seriously..Beware.. ur dealing with someone that is either borderline psychotic or psychotic.. thats the only thing i can think of to explain her behavior..

Answer 3

If you are still with your wife, you obviously loved her enough to accept that she cheated while you were in jail. That may be so, but it sounds to me like you have never forgiven her and give her a hard time over it. 4 years is a long time to be held accountable for a "mistake". Maybe she has had enough of being reminded about it, that she did in fact make this story up, so as you would go out and play up.....then if you were unfaithful, you couldnt hastle her anymore about what happened 4 years ago. It was your choice to stay with you wife, you can also make a conscious choice to trust her again...You not trusting her doesnt make the outcome any different....If anything, you hassling her out about an event constantly may have the opposite effect.

Answer 4

You say she admitted to cheating on you 4 years ago and you have 'held it over her head' for the past four years....?? is that correct?
It's quite possible that staying together since and not living in a forgiving mode all these years has done some damage to the relationship instead of progressing out of the past. (the jail thing could be left out of the details in this case)
If she's doing something recently, you might conclude she's capable of an emotional affair at best. You might have even pushed her into one.

Answer 5

Supposing she did tell the truth about making it up, that's not too cool.But if you've been making accusations before that happened, I can see her trying to p%#* you off to get even with you.If that's the case, both of you weren't being very grown-up.But you can't be certain about what she's lying about and what she's not, can you?In any case, she's pretty hateful.But if you've been holding over head all this time, what are you?Have you considered that you may have given her a reason to want to punish you?Think about it.Why did you stay with her after she had an affair, if you keep tormenting her with it?When you stay after something like that, it's because you want to work it out - not to torment the other person with the mistake she made.

Answer 6

I don't believe many women would do what you have written Maybe you need to sit down and talk about what she has to say and why she did what she did....
You were brave to seek the emails but it was also was a invasion of private matters ...
Trust is hard and when it is question it is never easy...I always advocate a third non participation party to come in and help work things out... They take the feeling out of it and get to the facts .This type of help can bring things back or at least help make decision of what the next step is.

How I wold react if it happen to me and I was you "She is just dang mean and not worth this type of ###

Answer 7

I think if I were you I would question her state of mind or motive. Does she really want you to cheat or is she trying to use this as a way out? Maybe the thought of you and another woman turns her on? Are you absolutely sure she cheated to begin with? Maybe she just said it to make you jealous. I think it may be time to visit a therapist and get to the bottom of this situation. I think there is more to this than her wanting you to cheat so you can't say anything about her affair.

Answer 8

Let me just say this one lie leads to another and the trust is out the window. Never mind all the excuses it sounds really bad to me. Get some counseling or get out is she worth the trouble? Do you really by the story and do you think she could cheat on you??
Wow ....if my man said that to me he would be gone.I have a never lie motto if you keep a secret or lie you have created a problem and sweetie I don't keep a problem i get rid of it...enough drama already. Good luck and find your a self a good woman though won't lie for any reason... yes we exist!!

Answer 9

Let me let you in on a lil secret>>>Men may have the brawn, but women have the deception. I hate to say it, but women are capable of things that most men would never even consider lol I'll say this to you with all respect...read back over your question and admit that all of it sounds like a bunch of crap! If she's lieing or she's not isn't the issue>>>>If she cheated, then she's unfaithful....if she didn't, then she's an extreme liar...think about it. If I were a man, I wouldn't want to be with either one! Good Luck to you

Answer 10

The question is not whether someone is capable of this, rather, why is she playing this kind of mind games with you? I don't believe she cheated (in a physical way), though she obviously had correspondence with this guy online. I don't know what her problem is but if you are to even have a relationship together, she needs to change her attitude. She obviously has issues and sounds pretty disturbed.

Answer 11

If I did your wife I Wouldnt tell you about it and very few
guys would,=- They may be worried that you might shoot them..

I think there is a good posibuility, that it happened.
Its all up to you what do you think - does she lie to you regularly?
How many times have you caught her lieing?
If you ask her a question about something, and she denies it
even though you know the truth, does she keep saying she didn't do it-- does it take a picture of her doing it before she will own up to it?
It really depends on who she is and what you know about her..
YES women are just as good at it as a guy is and can probably do it even easier- ( A GUY HAS TO WORK TO GET LUNCH-
THE GIRL HAS IT- IF ITS OFFERED, MOST WILL TAKE IT )