My wife recently left me in a really bad situation.,. I deserved some of it but not this.. I Love this woman more than anything else in the world and am really hoping she will have a change of heart and come home..Despite the fact I have no intentions of trying to get together with anyone else at the moment (I am still waiting for her).. how long should I wait before I really just give up hope?
Has anyone here had a split in their marriage and had it come back together? how long did it take?
2006-08-19 14:46:03 · 6 answers · asked by althor989 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What prompted this was a girl I used to work with sending me pictures she shouldnt have.. which I promptly deleted.. then she sent another reg one.. that my wife didnt care for though it wasnt any bit deal.. she started yelling at me about it when I was half asleep and I thought she was talking about the one I deleted.. to the point I stuck my foot in my mouth because I forgot about something and didnt tell her ... she thought I was hiding things.. then a few nights later she started getting touchy-feely which was good.. and she aske me "Who are you thinking about right now".. I blew my top.. I knew what she was getting at and it rolled down hill from there.. what it boils down to is that she left me over a name-calling match.. ive begged and snivveled to no avail.. it has been 3 months.. I just moved away from ALL my family and friends to be near HER parents that live 5 minutes from me.. I have no one here and she went back to where my family is..I have nothing here.. I hate it......
2006-08-19 15:15:08 · update #1
My ex is constantly badgering me to get back together with him. It has been 16 months since our split and 13 months since our divorce. I would consider taking him back if he meets very strict criteria. But he chooses to still blame me for what was wrong in our marriage. If I let on to him that I would take him back, he would never go through the changes he needs. Do what you need to do and don't spend so much energy on her. Fix you and then try to fix your marriage. If it is too late to fix your marriage, make her a really good friend by proving to her that it is never too late to change. GL
2006-08-19 15:07:23 · answer #1 · answered by TotallylovesTodd! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ohh, that's too bad. So, it was basically a misunderstanding. Well, I don't know what to tell you about that...hard to know how long you should wait. I would suggest that you do everything you can to mend the relationship before calling it quits. You have probably already thought about this, but what about marital therapy? My husband and I were having really bad troubles at one point and we went....it changed things a lot! Our marriage is solid now...and I NEVER thought I would be saying that, believe me.
You didn't mention whether or not you have children together? If you do...I most definitely think that it is always best to exhaust every possible effort before letting go of the marriage. That's when it becomes really touchy...when there are kids involved.
You might try writing her a letter letting her know exactly what happened and tell her how much you miss her, etc. Also let her know that you need to know if it is over or if she wants to come home, because it isn't fair to you that she is keeping you in limbo. I am sure you have already told her this in words, but sometimes seeing it in writing can make a big difference.
I am so confused as to why she would actually leave you over this...did she think that the two of you were having an affair or something? I mean...I would be upset too, but I wouldn't leave...especially if it was something that I knew I couldn't prove. As far as I can tell, all you did was admit that the other woman had sent you some photos that probably weren't very...uhm, ladylike. Well, you didn't send them, lol...why is she mad at you? You did the right thing. You deleted them. Hmmm, just confused.
Anyhow, good luck to you and I hope I have helped you in some small way.
2006-08-19 22:47:09 · answer #2 · answered by ShineOn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think, you need to talk to your wife about it. Ask her straight on - would she consider getting back together in the near future, if you agreed to work on things that went wrong? If she says no, then I'm afraid it just means no, and you will have to start a new life by yourself, the sooner the better. Don't harbor hopes that a "no" might turn into a "yes"; it will destroy you. Give it a few weeks, and have a talk with her. If she still says "no", move on.
I've only known one couple who got back together after being divorced. They got divorced again eventually. Good luck.
2006-08-19 21:56:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a split with my first wife and it lasted about 8 months, we got back together, but it didn't work out and we divorced 6 months later. My only suggestion is make sure your both getting back together for the same reasons! And all wounds have been healed! Good Luck
2006-08-19 21:54:35 · answer #4 · answered by christopher 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I split up for a while due to cheating. We did end up reconciling and I moved back into our family home, it took awhile 6-7 months. I dont know what prompted your wife to leave you, but if it has anything to do with cheating it may take a while.
2006-08-19 21:52:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You didn't give many details, so it is hard to judge what is going on
2006-08-19 21:53:51 · answer #6 · answered by Annie R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋