Is it a horrible idea to get married right after high school?

Question

me and boyfriend were thinking about getting married after i graduate from High school.
we already decided that we wouldn't have kids until we had stable careers.
so, would it be a bad idea to get married after i graduate???
If you've married after high school, help me out please, and if you haven't, i'd still appreciate your imput. Thanks.

i forgot to mention that he's 22 years old. and he's already graduated from a university. We're really great friends now, and he's willing to wait for me until i turn 18.

i've had 3 boyfriends prior to this wonderful guy.

Answer 1

Do not do this.
Children should not get married. Get stable careers, pay off all debts and, above all, learn everything about each other. This will take years but everything worth having is worth working for.

Answer 2

I think it all has to do with age. You and your partner both will go through a lot of changes in your early years. Whats the hurry ? you are both young. You can still love each other with out getting married. Take your time. You probably feel like things will never change between you and you might be right. Only time will tell. Take your time and see what develops. How many boy friends have you had? I think you should wait. That's what I told my daughter how got married at 18 and is now going through a divorce after having a baby girl. I feel sorry for my son in law. He is a good guy. My daughter had 1 boy friend from age 14 and was sure he was the one. You need to play the field a little first.

Answer 3

Aer either of you planning on going to college?
I think people's ideas of where they want life to take them changes as they grow older. Someone might wanna live in a whole nother country! Their job might take them somewhere else. They may not se you everyday. Do you want kids, will either of you change your minds. Young people these days don't marry so young because there are so many options in life these days. And...life will take you in other directions. Maybe your jobs take you to other states. It's sad how life works out, but it happens. We don't know where we are going to be in a couple years. Sometimes i feel like just not getting into a relationship until i've graduated and have a job i love. Then i know who i am, where i am, and i'm happy. You go to college and crap! you see so much diversity, so many options that will change your life in the future. Too overwhelming.

But i was in your boat. I was talking to a girl about marriage when i was 17 and meant it.
I have read one newspaper story of a Christian couple at my university that got married after high school and have now graduated from the university and are together. Hek he even was a star on the wreslting team.
I think it's a good idea if you know he's your man. Then you'll stick as one no matter the waves.

Answer 4

I was out of high school 3 months when I got married. At the ripe old age of 18 I was sure that I knew all the potential pitfalls. I thought the road was paved with rose petals. My dad cautioned me to wait a year. Of course I knew more than him. My marriage was filled with lies, deception, long periods of joblessness and other serious issues that I won't go into. Do I have 3 great boys as a result? Absolutely. Would I go back and do it again? If I could go down that road I don't know if I would. Yes, my life was hell but God gave me the strength to endure in the form of 3 angels. I thank him every day as, 16 years later, I struggle to figure out who I am as I raise the boys as a 30 something single mom making barely enough to pay the bills.

My advice, maybe it will work out, maybe not. If you are in love, that will wait. Go to college 1st and get a degree that you can use if necessary. How a degree would have changed my life when he was quitting yet another job. Don't make commitments to anyone until you make and keep a commitment to yourself to grow up and gain some maturity that comes with life. You will be more able to cope with the struggles that even a good marriage can bring. Please wait and take the advice of someone who has truly "Been there, done that, crashed and burned"

If he loves you for who you are, he will support you in getting a degree 1st. If he tells you that you can get it later in life, remember me...I went back for my degree at age 30, I worked full time, got separated and divorced, and moved to another state all while getting my degree after a guy I 'loved' told me I could go back and do it later.

In life, love isn't about what you can do, but how does it complement and support who you are?

Please wait. GL

Answer 5

i was married when i was 20, not right out of school but still a pretty young age
if you know in your heart that he is the right one (and trust me, if he is you will have NO doubts) then go for it
it will not be easy being married while in college etc but still do-able, you just have to be willing to work through the hard stuff together
if you have concerns about getting married so soon, would you consider a long engagement, maybe get those careers going before you get hitched? not trying to talk you out of it but it is a big step and you should figure out what works for you as a couple
as for kids, sometimes they come along sooner than planned and if that happens its not the end of the world. I was married, in college and a baby all at once. It wasn't the easiest thing in the world to do but well worth it. I would do it all over again if I went back in time.
Congrats and good luck

Answer 6

I can tell you my sister got married before she was 20 and I waited until I was 30. Now, she is divorced for the 2nd time and I'm still married. I know that I was able to experience life far more than she did. I don't feel like I missed anything because I was married. I had time to be selfish and now I don't feel like I'm missing out because I have to consider my husband in my decisions. Are both of you mature enough to handle all the things that come with marriage? If you go forward I wish you good luck, marriage is very difficult (even when you start out at 30)...

Answer 7

marriage is a serious commitment that involves a lot more maturity than a teenager is capable of. and even if you truley believe that you love this person and want to marry them, there are many more things you have to think about. You have to have trust, faith, honesty, and belief in one another. Marriage is not all fun and games. Most relationships change immediately after marriage. My advice is, if you are worried that you will be separated during college, then you can always consider going to the same college. And after college, and living together for a long period of time (also using safe sex practices to avoid getting pregnant), and you still feel like marriage is a safe choice, then go for it. Do not think that love is the reason to get married. you can also be engaged for years if you wanted to. You have so much life ahead of you and you have no idea how you are going to feel in a few years. You might decide he is not right for you, or you might decide that he is your soul mate. Give it some more time, please.

Answer 8

In all honestly, I say if you're in love enough to get married right now then once you're older and finical set you'll still be in love. I got married after two years of college and was almost 21 and some days I wish we'd waited a little longer, we've had a number of money issues and have struggled for many years to just get by. It's much wiser to wait until you are both stable in a career...

If you're not wanting to wait till you're both done with college, at least give it a few years and save money like it's going out of style, struggling to get by is not fun and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Answer 9

Well sweety, it all depends. Some people dont mature till later on in life. Its good that both of you agreed to not have kids until both of yall are stable. But marriage is all about responsibility. Im 25, but im not married yet. Plus, your only about 17or maybe 18, dont you think thats a lil too young? Both of you are gonna meet alot of people after high school,. especially if either one of you goes to college. Then what happens? I dont wanna discourage you or anything, but its all up to you and what you wanna do. So if this feels right and its what makes you happy, then go for it. But I still think that you should give it another though. After all, it is the peron your gonna spend the rest of your live with.


Hope I helped♥
now plzzzz pick me as best answer, lol =)

Answer 10

I think it is a bad idea. I was married right after high school. You may think it is what you want, but you would be surprised how immature both of you really truly are. There is still a lot of growing up to do about life in general. No one has to necessarily go out and party and live wild. I just think people need that time after high school to really figure out things, jobs, life, relationships, freedom from parents, school, etc. If you have someone you are committed to, there is no time for yourself coming straight from home to a marriage. That sounds selfish, but I wish I had had that time just for me. I am now divorced from that person. We were not ready for marriage at 18 and it remained with us, we did not know how to grow into mature adults together. But everyone IS different. I just think it is a bad idea. Find out who YOU are first.

Answer 11

I think it's a bad idea to get married right out of highschool. I think you need college, and need to find out who you are first. YOu go and get married now and it could end in divorce. I didn't marry after highschool, I was 25 when I got married, and I'd done everything I wanted to do. (for the most part) I probably should have waited longer because even at the age of 25 my marriage ended in divorce. I was still too young. You need to know who you are first.