Every couple of months the come and visit for 2 weeks at a time keeping the kids and me up late waking us up really early and using my husband as their own go boy. It's pissing me off. Any suggestions?
2006-08-19 10:40:38 · 12 answers · asked by lilmama 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
1. you and hubby have to be united in this. 2. you have to be direct and straight to the point. 3. stick with decision... and be polite about it. 4. its your husbands parents..so he should do the talking..and make sure they know he is totally in agreement with you. because most likely you will be blamed. mom...dad... although we enjoy seeing you.. every couple of months... my wife and i would like you to find,..another place to stay.. when you visit this time. we love you and this is not a request we make easily..but our first consideration must be the continuity of our household. well... i knew you would understand. love ya bye
2006-08-19 10:59:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your husband to find them a hotel for either them to stay at, or you will stay there with the kids.
Kids get confused when their routine is upset, and it is not a good idea to tolerate disrespect from realtives in front of them. That only perpetuates the parent-bullying-approval-thing. How do you think he got that way? Don't teach your kids to be like that....
Tell your husband that you feel disrespected by them, you don't appreciate the kids' routine being upset, and that you are starting to resent it.
It is HIS place to resolve this, not yours. If you step in and ask them to stay elsewhere yourself, YOU are the one to be held responsible for being a bad guy.
Make it clear to him that either they go, or you will. And don't let him make YOU feel bad about it. He needs to be more considerate of you and the kids, and don't let him tell you any different. Tell him that his spineless-ness is causing a rift between you two, but some courage and standing up for you and the kids would earn him some points with you and you would have so much more respect for him....it would make you feel chosen, defended, and protected, like his special girl...
Point being, you have a problem, a solution, a consuquence, and an incentive all laid out. You then make it his choice.
2006-08-19 10:57:20 · answer #2 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have your hubby tell them... Just simply say there is not enough room this time.
here are a few "white lies" you could try just to get out of it once...
"the house is a total mess"
"we are painting"
"the bed in that room broke"
"we are down to only 1 bathroom"
"we made plans for part of that time"
"my cousin Zulu from Africa is staying for that week"
"the kids are sick"
"the flu is going around"
Or just be honest and explain that you have to work early in the morning and their visits are disruptive.. Tell them it would be fine if they'd like to stay for 2 or 3 nights when you dont work the next morning but during the week ts simply an inconvenience and offer to help them find somewhere else to stay.. if they have to stay at a hotel- offer to shell out for a night or 2 if you can afford it...
GOOD LUCK!
2006-08-19 11:09:06 · answer #3 · answered by ChrissyLicious 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off find a nice and comfortable place nearby that they can afford. Then simply nicely and politely tell them that you do not have enough room and need some privacy and say hey, I found this great place which is very reasonable nearby. You have to set your boundaries. If this offends them, then there are rude and inconsiderate. But you will still have your space and comfort.
2006-08-19 10:48:10 · answer #4 · answered by Island Queen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them when they come to your house they are guests and as guests you expect them to follow your houserules out of respect for you and your husband. Reassure them that you don't mind their visits as long as they are respectful of your wishes. The flip side to this , is that in this day and age it is so rare that families take the time to spend with each other so as much as it annoys you , you should still be grateful they are making an effort to be active in your lives. They won't be around forever. I didn't grow up with my grandparents around and my father's parents died before I was born. I wish I could have grown up with my grandparents around.They are livinghistory ask them to tell kids stories of how they grew up , family history. These are times to be cherished.If they still bother you that much I think it would do a lot of family damage for you to tell thm to stay elsewhere, you needto share your concerns with your husband before you act on it.
2006-08-19 10:53:16 · answer #5 · answered by spiffymo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is NO nice way to accomplish this. Just be honest adn tell them it's too much. It would be nice to have your husband on your side too.
2006-08-19 10:46:15 · answer #6 · answered by cannon1977 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um there is no nice way, you need to get your husband on your side first, explain the situation. I no what u mean though, when it comes to men and their parents, they wont even ask another question, but then us women ave to sit their in silence.
good luk hun
2006-08-19 10:48:41 · answer #7 · answered by sweetlikehoney_73 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no way to do that one nicely. Just tell them the truth, how you feel about the situation.
2006-08-19 14:09:13 · answer #8 · answered by Mee Mee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell them exactly what is going on. its the tone of your voice that matters. if you act wierd about it, then it will be awkward. just come straight out and tell them, nicely, to live elsewhere.
2006-08-19 10:46:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no easy way to deal with in-laws. It would be a good idea to be upfront with them.
2006-08-19 10:56:35 · answer #10 · answered by Kim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋