ok everyone please read this and leave you response?

Question

Someone once noted that a Southerner can get away with the most awful kind of insult just as long as it's prefaced with the words, "Bless her heart" or "Bless his heart." As in, "Bless his heart, if they put his brain on the head of a pin, it'd roll around like a Basket Ball on a six lane highway." Or, "Bless her heart, she's so buck-toothed, she could eat an apple through a picket fence." There are also the sneakier ones: "You know, it’s amazing that even though she had that baby 7 months after they were married, bless her heart, it weighed 10 pounds."

As long as the heart is sufficiently blessed, the insult cannot be all that bad. I was thinking about this the other day when a friend was telling about her new Transplanted Yankee friend, who was upset because her toddler is just beginning to talk and hehasaSouthernaccent. My fiend, who is very kind and, bless her heart, cannot do a thing about those thighs of hers, was justifiably miffed about this. After all, this woman had CHOSEN to move to the South a couple of years ago. Can you believe it?" said her friend. "A child of mine is going to be "taaaallllkkin liiiike thiiiissss."

Now, do not get me wrong. Some of my dearest friends are from the North, bless their hearts. I welcome their perspective, their friendships and their recipes for authentic Northern Italian food. I have even gotten past their endless complaints that you cannot find good bread down here. And the heathens, bless their hearts, don't like cornbread, or know how to make a biscuit!

We have already lost too much. I was raised to say "I swaan," not I swear, but you hardly ever hear anyone say that anymore, I swaan you don't. And I've caught myself thinking twice before saying something is "right much," "right close," or "right good" because non-natives think this is right funny indeed. I have a friend from Bawston who thinks it is hilarious when I say I've got to "carry" my sister to the doctor or "cut off" the light. She also gets a giggle every time I am "fixin'" to do something.

And, bless their hearts, they don't even know where "over yonder" is or what "I reckon" means!

My personal favourite was my aunt, saying, "Bless her heart, she can't help being ugly, but she could've stayed home." She says the most beautiful women in the world are from the South. So if you see an ugly girl in the South, you know she is from out of town, or there is some "bad blood" in her family tree.

Southern girls know bad manners when they see them:

1. Drinking straight out of a can.
2. Not sending thank you notes.
3. Velvet after February.
4. White shoes before Easter or after Labour Day.

Southern girls always say:

1. "Yes, ma'am."
2. "Yes, sir."

Southern girls have a distinct way with fond expressions:

1. "Y'all come back! Now ya heaah,"
2. "Well, bless your heart."
3. "Drop by when you can."
4. "How's your mother?"
5. "Love your hair."

Southern girls know their three R's!:

1. Rich
2. Richer
3. Richest

Southern girls know everybody's first name:

1. Honey
2. Darlin'
3. Sugah

Southern girls know the movies that speak to their hearts:

1. "Gone With the Wind"
2. "Fried Green Tomatoes"
3. "Driving Miss Daisy"
4. "Steel Magnolias"

Southern girls know their cities dripping with Southern charm:

1. Hotlanta or Adlanna =( Atlanta as outsiders say)
2. Richmon
3. Challston
4. S'vannah
5. Birminham
6. Nawlins'
7. Naashvul
7. OH! And that city in Alabama ? It's pronounced MUNTGUMRY!

Southern girls know the three deadly sins:

1. Bad hair
2. Bad manners
3. Bad blind dates

G.R.I.T.S. = Girls Raised in The South!

Now you run along, Sugah, and send this to someone else Raised in the South, i.e., Southern Belles, or ANY females aspiring to be GRITS. Even the transplanted Yankees, "Bless Their Hearts".

However, remember, "Just because your children were born in the South does not make them Southerners. After all, if a cat had kittens in the oven, that wouldn't make them biscuits."

Bless Your Hearts and save the world, as it’s the only planet with chocolate

I figured that every guy has the right to post at leasr on pointless question so this is mine

Answer 1

I like the bit about the kittens. And the chocolate. And the bit about everyone being entitled to one pointless question. I like the question about Northerners v. Southerners.
Hey up to that other Northern lass, ah's tha doin'?

Bless yer 'eart, luv

Answer 2

well, bless your ever lovin' heart there, you sure enough sound like some kind of transplanted southern feller...most fellers that are borned in the south might rightly know that it don't matter much if a girl is borned in the south or not, she's gonna know things a feller don't...such as them there things you done listed there...they was pretty much right on...my grandma was a hillbilly, but that don't mean i'm one of them there girls you define with such educating words there...i try not to judge neither them there citified fellers or these here country billy bobs and don't know why you would try to figger out any of us here girls...it depends on the heart of the matter, i might rightly say

Answer 3

You know, it's wierd - here in the UK it's we northerners who are made fun of for being less sophisticated than people who live in the south.

For example, a headmaster I know was at a conference. He works in the north, and was talking to the head of an exclusive southern private school. When he mentioned where he worked, the other head asked: "Do the women really stand in the street and eat meat pies?"

Prejudice is rife. I just think tha's best off leavin' 'em to them posh southern ways o' theirs, an gerrin' on wi' t'important things in life, lak raisin' ferrits, weerin' flat caps an' standin' in t'street eatin' baked pastry producks.

Answer 4

I reckon this is rather insulting and has racist tendances, and as I come from the South of England you certainly are not going to get your heart blessed.

Answer 5

Well, I'm a Western girl and I must admit that the American south conjures pictures of "bless 'em" poorly educated hillbillies who cannot speak proper 'American English' to save their lives and who consider "ain't" an actual, acceptable word. They're the: Billy Joe Bobs', Emma Jeannes', often borne of inbreds, shotguns, "chewin tobacc-ee", old pick-up trucks, red-necks, moon shine, greasy spoons and grits--oh, and people of lower I.Q.'s in general.

Okay, okay, I freely admit I am expressing an appallingly narrow minded, prejudiced view (please note: the previous statement excludes George W. Bush, who is a fine example of everything mentioned in the previous paragraph, along with the moronic red necks who voted for him).

Anyway, I'm still waiting-- oops I mean fixin' -- for one of the hillbillies to prove me wrong!!! Now, don't y'all go 'n release the hounds on me now, cuz I'm only jus' jestin' wi' chya... ;o) LOL

Answer 6

Bless your heart for making me read that extremely long question :)

Answer 7

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... Bless your heart... I got bored reading that and I'm from Mursburra (aka Murfreesboro) Tennessee.

Answer 8

Entertaining as this is I still prefer a woman with her own mind, bless your heart, you're not one.

Answer 9

Very interesting.

Now, bless your heart, if you could just tell me the question...?

Answer 10

Bless your heart, that was fascinating.