His ex gf cheated on him twice. and now he thinks I'm going to. and it causes arguments between us all the time. he says he knows there are a lot of boys that like me and he's afraid that i'm going to leave him for one of them guys. i tell him i love him and there is no way that im going to but he has a hard time believeing me what should i do please help.
2006-08-19 07:06:07 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Usually when dudes ask their lady if she is cheating, it is because the he is actually cheating on her, but considering your boyfriends previous relationships this is not the case. He is just scared that history may repeat itself, I can't really blame him. you should just tell him he should be honored that alot of other guys are attracted to his girlfriend (you), then you should say, " All those other guys don't mean anything, because at the end of the night I come home to you, it's just you and me, no one else matters". But then againg the say once your burned, you really can never recover, I suggest you try to find out why his ex gf cheated on him, there usually is a good reason. Good luck. I know it's a difficult road, but remember rainy days don't last forever.
2006-08-19 07:19:03 · answer #1 · answered by shogun 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lady you have a problem and it is bigger than you know.
Your boyfriend has been bitten and is having trouble trusting anyone. It is possible he will get over it, it is equally possible that he never will. At this point his distrust of everyone is spilling onto you and in turn into your relationship. This is the sort of thing that destroys marriages. I have been married for 35 years, I have never cheated on my wife and I am as certain as a human can be that she has never cheated on me. I trust her, if I didn't I would leave. Additionally she acts as if she trusts me. If she didn't I would leave. A marriage can't survive a constant diet of distrust and the arguments it breeds.
In my opinion your boyfriend needs to get some professional help. You can't give this help, all you can do is encourage him to see a psychiatrist or counselor. Your threatening to leave if he doesn't is not out of the question.
If he refuses you will have to make a decision, are you going to leave him and move on with your life? Or, are you going to accept him, as is, and live the life of 20 questions every time you come home and endure the arguments that follow. As I said earlier he may grow out of it but this could be a life long affliction.
Good luck, and I wish you the best regardless of your choice.
2006-08-19 07:42:21 · answer #2 · answered by gimpalomg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first if you reasure him that you are not going to cheat. and he still feels that way. let him know up front that you are not that type of person but if you keep put that pressure on me we have to call it quits because technically that is mental abuse and why would you want to stay in a relationship like that. on the other hand he could be cheating think about this.
2006-08-19 07:12:58 · answer #3 · answered by Trini 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that with out his trust that you cannot be in a relationship with him. tell him that just because his ex g/f cheated doesn;t mean all girls cheat. tell him that if he doesnt trust you then their is no point in seeing eachother. he needs a wake up call and a taste of reality. Not only does he sound insecure but he is selfish and immature.... maybe it is better u dump him
2006-08-19 07:12:54 · answer #4 · answered by Wibble 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, it is not your fault that other people cheated on your boyfriend. in order to have a good relationship there has to have trust in there somewhere and he dont trust you and the sad thing is, you have given him no reason to doubt you. i think that he is just not ready for a relationship if he is that insecure. i know he has been hurt, but it is not going to help if he cant trust you.
2006-08-19 07:14:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a loser. He doesn't trust you for no reason... so move on. Sounds like he has way to much baggage. Drop him and his baggage off at the nearest air port and find a guy with a few less trust issues.
2006-08-19 07:13:37 · answer #6 · answered by That's my final answer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I would not cheat on him, for starters. Then just tell him to drop the subject.....forever. If he does not, dump him and go out with someone else. It's not worth all the time fighting.
2006-08-19 07:11:38 · answer #7 · answered by null_the_living_darkness 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just say that you are not leaving him and he needs to trust you.I don't know how old you are or him.But it hurt to be in love one day and the love is gone the next.Playing with peoples hearts really hurts and you need to learn that early on.
2006-08-19 07:17:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay first of all there is no relationship with trust! is he can't trust you it will take along time for it to happen if you really do love him wait for it but if you want to be in a relationship without having to explain urself all the time and be happy leave him its not love if it hurts but it wont be easy!
2006-08-19 07:13:08 · answer #9 · answered by nycblondiegirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to stop comparing you to his ex's. Either he needs to trust you or this is not going to work out.
2006-08-19 07:14:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋