what would you do?

Question

OK,
I got this buddy. He is having a bachelor party tomorrow. Friday a few guys were going to hang out. Have dinner and hang at a few bars.

So I call him in the afternoon to confirm. Yep, 7 or 8 we will grab dinner.

So I call at 7 to say I am heading over. His fiancée answers. He is at the store picking up some stuff. She tells me there is some big cocktail party tonight. Lots of her couple friends are coming over. There will be appetizers and drinking.

So I explained what I thought was going on. And she said no. and call him on his cell.
So I call him. And yep. Some coctail party.

So I have to make some dinner, now. And I call my girlfriend. Who has made other plans. She is like, screw them.

So I decided not to go out.

And he calls like an hour and a half later, from when our original plans are. I don’t answer. But the machine does. And he says “oh my fiancée says we should invite your girlfriend.”
So.....

1) Would you have gone? by yourself? with your GF?
2) Do you think he thought we could just take off? Or he had no idea about the coctail party?
3) So does his fiance hate my GF? Hate both of us?
4) What is with the call. an hour and half after the start time?
Were they checking if I was going to show up? called to really invite my GF? Then why invite her so late?

Answer 1

Okay, don't freak out. Obviously his fiancee' changed the "guy" plans cause she didn't want him prowling the bars. I would have declined and you don't need to give an excuse. The girlfriend thing; that was a fart-thought. The fiancee' is in control and she only wanted couples at their cocktail party. So...you should say no, and no thanks; I'll catch you next time, my girlfriend is busy, and I'm going out with a few guys tonight. Then call some of your single buddies and have a good time. Just blow this crap off to your friend not having the balls to tell the fiancee' he's made plans with the guys first. Life is too short to worry about the controlling female.

Answer 2

1) I wouldn't have gone. Friends should respect your time enough to know that you planned to spend it with them. When they change those plans, you get to make your own decisions.

2) He knew about the cocktail party. If done right, they take time and energy to set up. It's not just inviting a few friends over after work, there is a lot to prepare for. And if he's a good fiance, he knew he couldn't just take off. Now, he may have forgotten about it, but a good friend would have called and said "Oh, man, I totally forgot, and I can't go to the bar tonight, but..." Again, respecting your time and company

3) I can't answer the fiance question. Honestly, he probably forgot about it and was responsible for inviting you and your GF. And are you close to his fiance? She may have really forgotten that you have a GF and it was an afterthought.

4) The call is just odd. He may have been feeling bad about forgetting to invite you and his fiance urged him to call, or he figured you would be bored at a cocktail party and possibly went out with the other guys.

Honestly, call your friend. Tell him that you felt disrespected by his actions and if it was an accident, let it be. You need to find out t he truth from him, instead of relying on yourself and others to try to figure out his motives. He is the only one who really knows why it went down like that.

Now, if he was just being an idiot, get new friends.

Answer 3

1. Don't go.
2. Take your girl out.
3. Call friend in a week. Set up plans to go on vacation together, close enough to make reservations.
4.Wait till buddy says he has confirmed reservations, and tell buddy "Dulp, were having a cocktail party, can't make the vacation thing".

Answer 4

That was rude of them both. I know of this kind of thing happening and it sucks.

U should have said sorry becaise plans changed without us knowing until the last minute we made other plans. Tell (ur friend) u want to talk to him about tis when he has a free moment and express how u didn't like what happen. Even if he didn't know himself.Still speak up

Answer 5

Sounds like his fiance is a control freak... I would have told them, sorry too late, I thought we had other plans...It was supposed to be a bachelor party not a chick cocktail party.... No, being a girl myself, that fiance chick has some issues... I would make plans with just your friend to celebrate another time.... 'F' her.... sorry....

Answer 6

Well, realize what happened.

the girls agenda was forced upon your friend or was chosen as the more important one.
you know who will win from now one with this scenario.
Thus is common in life, as the girlfriend/wife will always win out.

Just watch some old "honeymooner" episodes.

You did what was natural. And If it was me I would never make plans with this person again.

Answer 7

Sounds like he is marrying one controlling woman. For her to change plans at the last minute - please. And this is supposed to be his bachelor party not hers.

I wouldn't have gone either - and for your gf to be an afterthough - nice friends.

Stick with your girlfriend - you got a winner there! :) Good luck!

Answer 8

1st the lady come first and the bachelor party comes second.

Answer 9

Who cares. . don't read too much into it. . . sounds like they are just irresponsible and unorganized. You should have gone to the party. . .then went to the strip club with your girlfriend. . . picked up a whore dancer. . . and went home to have a threesome!

Answer 10

That is like a damn essay question. Jeez. I might as well start my homework. Later Sorry