I s it wrong to be with someone beacuse they give you a good quality of life?

Question

My partner and I have a 3year old and a 8 month old and after 4 years together all we have done is fight, pretty much 6months into the relationship.

I feel like I know nothing is ever going to change the best I can hope for is that I just accept that we may live together but pretty have sep. lives. He goes out with his friends on the weekends and I'm bound to my kids.

If I wasn't so materialistic I may have left by now. But I have my dream house, car and hired help. Not to mention I haven't worked a day in my life since I met him when I was 19! and he doesn't seem to care if I never work again as long as I shutup and let him do what he wants.

I feel that I have become to accustomed to my standard of living and if I ever had the guts to leave him I may regret it when my lifestyle changes and I don't know how I could deal with it.

I have everything money can buy but just know one share it with.

Answer 1

First off, do you love him???
Secondly, if my math is correct, you are ONLY 23 years young...
What has happened is you have lost who you are....
You speak of what "he" does, & that you are bound to your kids...
What about you?
Do you ever take time out for yourself?
You don't need anyone right now as it sounds as if your plate is full enough, so take some time out for yourself girl...
Find out who YOU truly are....
You are so much more than than a partner & a Mama...
Until you know yourself, no one else can...
I did the same thing, I was a wife & a Mama, that was it... & I am speaking from the other side as I did give everything up, & it ain't all what it's cracked up to be, because you are still alone, with the kids, making it by yourself.... & in my situation the kids are miserable because their parents aren't together...
I guess it really depends how bad the situation is?
& what YOU truly want...
Good luck & hang in there....
:o)

Answer 2

You've managed to blur the line between marriage and being a "kept" woman. I suppose that if you are willing to reduce yourself to "female for rent. Rich only apply" is fine. But, you've brought kids into this lovely arrangement. So, get off your butt. Go to college. You're only in mid twenties, so you've got time. You've got hired help, so you CAN do it. Pick a well paying profession, and become more than a decorative pet, who looks good, and is fun in bed. Your kids deserve a mother that has enough self respect to want more than life long dependency on a man.

Answer 3

yes it's wrong. Sounds to me like ur with him for comfort and not for love. you don't have money to share with anyone...he does. money can't buy everything especially not happiness. Step up and be a real woman, strive for success and be independent. Plus think about ur kids...it's not emotionally healthy for them to see u guys fight all the time. My best friend was in the same situation 'till some sense was knocked in her head, now she's a happier person even though she doesn't have all the luxury. Deal with it, in the long run you'll be ok. Good luck!

Answer 4

Sounds like a small price to pay in order not to work, but then you never have the satisfaction of your own hard earned dollars. Some people just cant hack life on their own the men become drunk hobos and the women become trophy wives (at least the good looking ones).

Answer 5

i've got self assurance you're depressed. I had a lot of a similar signs and indications, and that i'm working via way of melancholy suited now, in spite of the fact that I guard thinking i'm greater desirable and it comes lower back :(. I went to a therapist and a psychiatrist, and it helped a lot. choose to your favourite practitioner and business enterprise psychologist or one your favourite practitioner recommends, they could be waiting that may assist you communicate concerns out and get meds you additionally can go with. good fulfillment, I want concerns get greater desirable. attempt to no longer enable your self get real right into a dependancy of sleeping each and every time you haven't any longer something to do, and don't withdraw from putting out with friends or having a snort, b/c it's going to make it worse. i ended putting out with a lot of my friends and commenced sleeping after the excellent component I did (business enterprise, artwork, church, going to the save, all have been accompanied via way of a nap), it is going to in all likelihood make concerns worse. you're an effectual character, and the sector and different men and ladies is likewise making you think like trash, in spite of the incontrovertible fact that your a teenager of God, and you're superb in his eyes. carry in there.

Answer 6

omg...i understand that you have children but is the money really worth you being so unhappy?? i'm sorry but i truly believe that you don't want your children growing up thinking that you can just be with someone for the money! i understand that you have never worked but there are plenty of jobs out there that you could support yourself and your children...give up the luxurious lifestyle and show him you don't need him and can make it on your own!!! it may be hard at first but you'll survive...plus there are plenty of other fish in the sea...and you deserve to be happy!!!

Answer 7

I'm sure millions of married women share the same predicament as you. That is why they can't leave. They are trying to make the smart choice and I don't blame them. They want to look out for their physical comfort and security as well as for their children.

Answer 8

I don't understand your logic here? why are you complaining when you, your self said you were materialistic and you wanted that life style. please don't get me wrong here. i don't mean to be harsh but I think you realize now money doesn't buy love and attention. you are the only one that can give you the answer your looking for.

I wish you and your children all that life has to offer .

Answer 9

I suggest you stay and hopefully when you are old you save some of this money to save to buy you happiness because you will be lonely and feel like you wasted your life.

Answer 10

Have you tried counseling?? I hate that we live in situations for our kids, but maybe one day it will all work out!!! Put it in Gods hands!!!!