Tell Me, Do You See Anything Wrong With Me 16 A Year Old, Dating A 23 Year Old Guy?

Question

If So Why?

Answer 1

As long as you love him, absolutely nothing is wrong with it.

My partner Jonathan tried to seduce me when he was 17, I was too dense to get it, so he humped my leg (I'm not kidding). Now, almost 15 years later, we are still a couple, and one of the most successful ones -- gay or straight -- that I know of. We don't fight. We love each other very much, and we still have sex all the time (the last time was last night at 2 in the AM).

I am a number of years older than he is.

Don't sweat it, and let go of the part of yourself that thinks you should seek other people's approval (as in this question) for something YOU want.

Love yourself, love him -- it will all be fine.

*hug*

Kindest thoughts,

Reynolds
http://www.rebuff.org
[e-mail]

Note to Jane and other idiots -- the most common Age of Consent is 16 -- it probably is where the boy is -- and frankly, I knew what I wanted at 14 and it was none of anyone's ******* business. People like you disgust me. Maybe girls aren't capable of knowing what they want at 16, but I've seen VERY few boys that aren't.

Answer 2

Well, you're both legal, so in that sense no. I would be inclined to question what a 23 year old man sees in a 16 year old boy though - you can't have much in common, conversationally. I'd be careful if I were you, you might end up getting hurt. I hope I'm wrong but I'm 24 and I wouldn't ever be attracted to a 16 year old (of either gender, I'm bi) as socially, and even to an extent sexually, they'd have very little to offer me. I suppose that a lot rests on how "young" a 16 you are. The age of consent is unambiguous so it doesn't take such things into account, but if you are a very young, slim, small 16 year old then I would call the guy's motives into question.

ps: I would offer exactly the same advice to you, regardless of the gender of the person you were shagging!!!

Answer 3

Dude, you're kind of young. Being young is all about exploitation, you don't know half of what's going on at age 16. There's no way for me to explain this, you are probably thinking "I'm not too young!" because you are.
You won't know until later. You can be the most mature, sensitive, tough 16-year old on the planet, but it's not going to mask the fact that you've only been on the earth for 16 years... there are cats that are older than you! I mean, maybe you're an old soul, but honestly, there are some things you learn with age, and there are no shortcuts.
You should really be dating another hot 16-year old, because there's never going to be another time in your life when it will be legal to do so. After 18, that's it.

You will see one day that there is a difference between 23 and 16, the maturity level is different. I'm inclined to think this 23-year old dude is kind of a skeez, because he's clearly predatory in dating you... why can't he find someone his own age? I'm a little worried more about his brain than yours, there might be some maturity issues for him, and some other issues.

If you're going to date him anyway:
1.) Don't sell yourself short, don't think he's the only man in the universe because he's not, and don't let him run your life.
2.) You have a lot of life to live, go live it, and don't do stupid things! Stay safe, and say no to anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.
3.) Stay in school, and never move in with a man until you've at least finished college.
These things won't keep you out of trouble completely, but they are at least an offering of common sense.
Good Luck in love!

Answer 4

Yes. There are so many age-appropriate things that a 16 year old is missing when he's spending time with a 23 year old. You'll never be 16 again.

And in all likelihood, the 23 year old is into things that you should not be. If he's into 16 year old things, there's something askew with him. I'm talking about bars and sex, and much more.

7 years isn't a big deal when you're 40. But at 16, he's almost 50% older than you.

Answer 5

Legally it is wrong. The 23 year old needs to find guys 18 or older. The 16 year old should find guys his age since he's still a minor

Answer 6

No! I was 16 when i dated a 30 y/o.

Answer 7

there are plenty heterosexuals who are above the age of consent who go with folk a few years older than them, and their choices are rarely viewed as "an abomination".

if you are mature enough emotionally, then your affair with a guy who is twenty three is not really anybody's business, except that the age of consent for your area may need to be taken into consideration. its 16 here in britain.

i knew what i wanted when i was 16 personally, so i used to tell people who stuck their noses into my private life to mind their own business. we all live and learn, throughout our lives, and these folk have now realised that they were in the wrong, not me.

if you know what you're doing, and you're harming none, then do as you want.

however, like the other posters, i would question the 23 yr old guys motives for having a young bf...maybe you can enquire into his history and see if there is a pattern of younger bfs?... don't let anybody exploit you.

peace love and good luck, swot xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Answer 8

yes. at the age of 16 you are not mature enough to date a 23 year old guy. i am not saying that you are not mature for a 16 year old just not for a 23 year old. 23 year olds can do things that you can't legally or shouldn't do. now if they guy asks you out in a couple of years go for it.

Answer 9

Of course it's illegal. But also, a 23 year old is at such a different level than you are. Think about it, when he was a whole 7 years old, you were just being born. 16 year olds, no matter how mature and responsible we think we are at that age, just don't have life experience yet. I am not going to tell you it is wrong to date him, you can form your own opinions. But what kind of 23 year old has to reach into high school to find a date? I think he may be using you, and you are just heading for pain.

Answer 10

nothing wrong with that but be careful with the 16 yr old they are not mature enough for a relationship, an would put up with alot of bad stuff that someone your age wouldn't.