We have been together for over two years and it started getting bad a year ago. I felt something was different and then it just slowly got worse to worsest. We live together, which I think was part of the problem, and we decided it would be best for our relationship if we lived apart again and then he just gave up and said he was done. Now he is a complete dick when I am an emotional wreck. I know that we probably need to figure out our own problems apart from eachother because I think that we both fell into a depression and depended on the other to get eacother out. My biggest problem is that I didn't want to end it like this. Where, he doesn't seem to give a **** and he is happy that it is over because I wanted to fight for our love a little longer. And I also feel like he is throwing away the two years we had together by acting like it no longer means anything to him anymore. I know all breakups are hard but there are some where the two people still respect the other. Help!
2006-08-18 20:00:33 · 8 answers · asked by caroline 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I hate this for you. Break ups like this can really hurt and cut deep. Best advice I have to offer is that no one can make another person happy and totally complete them. You have to be happy with yourself and confident before you can even think about complete happiness. You can't depend on any human to make you completely happy with everything. Only you inside know if you are truly happy being you. The same with him. You can't make him happy if he isn't happy with himself. Human nature in my opinion, and especially with women, we want to save the world and something inside us makes us feel like we can help and make everything all better for our loved one, and then we realize we are totally ignoring anything else, and focusing on making him happy. Yes we really want to help, but it doesn't work that way. If he isn't happy with himself then sure you can be kind, encouraging, and uplifting, but you can't make him totally happy and live happily ever after for always. Sure would be nice if it worked that way, but it doesn't and don't ever allow yourself to be so consumed that you lose yourself. That is not a good thing at all. Us women can't change men and make them feel great all of the time, no matter how hard we try. I am sorry I wish I could help, but I will agree breakups like that are very difficult. Good luck! Believe in yourself and be happy with yourself and I promise if it's meant to be it will be. I know it's difficult, but please don't worry yourself sick over it. If possible try to think about other things. Good and positive and happy things.
2006-08-18 20:18:52 · answer #1 · answered by Amber T 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hiya im actually where you are right now fiance dumped me a week ago we had been togther 3 years and even though its only been a week im crying less and although it still hurts really bad! and i cry and i get angry i just think to myself the best thing to do is to move on if hes sees you doing this and it is meant to be he'll be back ,but if hes not then hopefully your be already on your way feeling abit happier just try not to let him get to there the ones that have made the mistake and only we know that just carry on looking gorgeous and keep thinking positively i know its hard it hurts everytime i wake up and find him not there but he will see in the end it was a huge mistake and by then u probably would have moved on and you will be able to look at him and play as hard as you can just remeber hes missing out not you :) xxmelxx good luck i know its hard x
2006-08-18 22:00:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had this happened to me. I'm a dude and yeah, we have feelings too. What was worst for me was that I didn't have a job at that time either, so all day that was all that was on my mind and it absolutely killed me. I wanted to take the plunge every day. What really helped me was alcohol and cigarettes and working out. These things will take you away for a little while, but be careful, only drink at home and don't be a wreckless person. I avoided her at all costs, from phone calls to seeing her. I'm still in the middle of it but the good thing is I found work and that takes away 8 hours from my day so I only have to deal with the other 16, well 6 hours average for sleep so 10 hours left, out of the 10 hours I am liquored up for at least 2 hours a day so i just have to deal with the rest of the 8 hours. I watch football, I watch movies or whatever to occupy my mind. It's still difficult, very difficult. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just here to suffer. They say roses do have thorns but there's just way too many thorns and I never see any roses.
2006-08-18 21:16:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look I know exactly what you are going through. I wasn't with my ex that long we were together for 8 months only i was young and naive and moved in his apartment after two weeks. About 4 months into it I felt things kind of shift to the worst but Istayed because we grew dependent on each other for little things Make a long story short I know how bad it hurts and it does take awhile to get over the pain because there is no way to heal it other then with acceptance of it being over. little by little day by day it goes away but it takes a long time just don't dwell on it let it go one day it will just be a memory
2006-08-18 20:12:04 · answer #4 · answered by fiery_ember 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Caroline, It sound to me like your b.f. had all this work out last year and was jusy waiting for the right moment to spring it on you.Sweety you might think your 2 years is worth fighting for but your b.f. doesn't care 1 way or the other.You need to kick this relation to the hub and move on with your life and find someone who with respect you for who you are.Get a guy who can be strong and not reli on his parnter to keep him strong.
Clowmy
2006-08-18 20:15:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's been my experience that time heals all heartache. If you will allow yourself to go out and start working on yourself, you'll find that your boyfriend will probably want you back. He will find out that the grass isn't any greener and want you back. The first time he sees you with someone else...it'll kill him! Sorry you are going through this..it sucks..I know!
2006-08-18 20:06:35 · answer #6 · answered by Fort Worth, TX 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
we broke up with my boyfreind three days ago and here i am enjoying my freedom..
2006-08-18 20:04:47 · answer #7 · answered by zimran!!.. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Babe hung your high head and find another.
2006-08-18 20:05:32 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋