Let me explain this guy is my 1/2 sisters cousin.. not mine since we have different fathers.. anyway.. he is my sisters family.. one night about 5 1/2 years ago. we had a fling.. it was about 3 months before i meet my husband. anyway when my husband and i were dating he never seemed to have a problem with me talking to this guy. ya know at my sisters parties or anything. but just tonight we were at a parade that my niece was in and his kids were in it too. and my husband was acting like a idiot. telling me that i looked at him.. well of course i looked at him! i look at everyone when i talk to them. And that he knows that i like this guy... gosh.. and his wife hates me.. because he always talked about me. this guy was in love with me for years. but i am 90% sure he is over that crap.. but after 5 years my husband starts to be a ash hole over this guy.. his wife always hated me but my husband always liked this guy but now he is just being plain rude to me about this.
2006-08-18 18:40:41 · 15 answers · asked by Kitty 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I do not know what is wrong with him.. I thought maybe he is cheating and trying to pick a fight.. or drugs.. he is never like this.
Or maybe some men get like this from time to time???
2006-08-18 18:42:10 · update #1
He knew about him from day 1.. it is not like it was a secret that he just found out. i see the way he treats his wife it is not like i am going to leave my husband for him..
2006-08-18 18:53:36 · update #2
Well i can see why his wife hates you. because of him always talking about you.. maybe his wife talked to your husband about him always talking about you and it got ur husband worrying maybe my wife is talking about him behind my back? what is she still likes this guy.. will she ever cheat on me.. ur husband is going threw alot right now. and i am sure that you are also. but i see from some of your other questions and answers that you deal with ur husbands ex wife.. so imagine what you feel when you 3 are together.. then times that by 2. i would not doubt the fact that this guy is still trying to get in ur pants..i am not sure what you want because you did not say one time that you do not have feelings for him.. leaving ur husband and having feelings are 2 different things. i wish the best for you and your husband and i do not think that you are a .... or there is anything wrong with what you did before you meet your husband.. ur 1/2 sisters family is her family not yours!
2006-08-18 19:11:46 · answer #1 · answered by ~Mrs.C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not my husband yet, but I do have a friend that I'm 'not allowed to talk to.' And the funny thing is, is that they were friends before I met my boyfriend. They had been friends all through school, up until their freshman year when my friend changed school districts and they just stopped talking.
We(my friend) always liked each other, but I wasn't comfortable with the age difference (3 years, not much now, but a lot in high/middle school), so we never dated. After we knew each other for 4 years, and kinda-sorta moved on, dated other people, and I met my current boyfriend and we started going on a few dates, and then decided to 'officially' be boyfriend/girlfriend.
After a year or so, we broke up, and I started talking to my friend a lot more than I had been lately, and we went out on one real date, and hung out as his place alot, and we slept together once, and then decided that dating just wasn't what our relationship was all about. We weren't meant at all to be anything more than friends, and we accept it.
But then a few months later, I got back together with my current boyfriend, and now he doesn't think that I should speak to my friend anymore. We don't hardly see each other as it is, because he moved about an hour and a half away, but my boyfriend is convinced that if we even email each other, I'll leave him for my friend.
It's really irritating, cause I don't have very many friends, and those that I do have mostly moved away or are finishing college still. The only people I talk to are my boyfriend, my 6 month old, and our immediate family members, and there's just some subjects and some fun to be had that can't be had with those people.
And on the other hand, he's a total hypocrite, because one of his friends is living with a girl that he fooled around on me with (a long, long, time ago, and what we broke up over), and he thinks it's okay to go hang out with them, without me.
It's a total double-standard and it's not fair.
And I've gone on for quite a while, so I think I'll stop now...
2006-08-19 02:36:45 · answer #2 · answered by Queen Queso 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, every now and then, even a good man like your husband, lets his negative thoughts get the best of him. It is absolutely horror for a husband to have to be around a man that his wife was with in the past. No matter how hard he tries, he can't help but dwell on the horrible images of you and that dude. He knows it is wrong to do so. It sounds like he just slipped. I would bet anything that he is absolutely sorry later.
Do you have to hang out with any girls that your husband used to be with?
The other dudes wife's behavior has nothing to do with him still being into you, talking about you all the time, etc. I mean, seriously, do you think this dude just goes on and on about you to his wife? C'mon, that is ridiculous. She is the way she is because she has to be around someone that her husband has been with as well. It is just a hard thing to deal with. I am not saying that her behavior is right, but it is understandable.
Your husband will come out of it. He might have been in a bad mood; something else might have triggered it; he might have let his thoughts get the best of him...whatever...you must forgive him.
Tell me how you feel the next time you hang out with your husband and a girl that he used to have "relations" with.
On a serious note, I wrote the question above to prove a point. Put yourself in his shoes, it is a hard position. Sure, it is easy to say that his behavior is wrong, but, until you are in his position on a regular, family-like basis, I would hesitate to judge him.
2006-08-19 02:52:54 · answer #3 · answered by Cing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband does that sometimes to. He will bring something up that happen 10 years ago like it happen yesterday. That piss me off. He makes me feel uncomfortable around people to saying I was looking at that person and all kind of crazy stuff. I know what u are talking about. I can not give u advice on that on because i have the same problem. Sometimes, I just leave for some hours to cool me off He been then piss me off so bad just wanna scream
2006-08-19 03:54:50 · answer #4 · answered by sazzybmt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never forgive and never forget how stupid it can be and find reason to be idiot. But I know people like him they are like kids jealous
even of the past and is impossible to change them - sorry.
I can talk on the phone with my Ex actual partners but I don't want to meet the person . My partner can be friend with ex and I respect but I don't want know this the Ex.
I make some statement before my relationship got series - don't let
the Ex be involved in the present but we can keep them as friends because of the wonderful time and memory always gonna be with us.
My Ex are one of the best friends today.
Never introduce the past to the present.
2006-08-19 02:21:26 · answer #5 · answered by Toto 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i would be a little suspious also not one time in this whloe letter did u say u have no feelings for him. second u know what ur husband means don't pretend like u don't. its not that u looked its how u looked at him. i know i know "i looked at him like i do everyone else" yea sure keep telling urself that. u got caught it doesn't mean u would ever do anything with him again. my guess is for a moment u remembered a past experience or feeling, our facial expressions say alot. most people don't even know they r doing it. the only reason u can't admit to it is even if it didn't mean anything presently ur husband would never understand.
of course i could be wrong
2006-08-19 02:00:08 · answer #6 · answered by jesse james 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Without reading the details....just answering the question generally: Even if a man is cheating on his respective mate...my belief is a man has a 'jealousy' gene. If he sees another man with a woman...and he's married himself...he's jealous and covetous. I think women are probably the same way to a lesser degree.
Just got to live with it, deal with it honestly and get over it?
2006-08-19 02:25:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it has been proven that when a person is so jealous they have something to hide.my brother did and he put up this front to keep people from learning about it.unless you give him some reason to be jealous maybe you are in love with this guy and really want to be with him .
2006-08-19 01:52:12 · answer #8 · answered by dalecollins64 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you must not want to stay married you are the reason why good men get divorced. you like this guy and he knows it the guys wife hates you because she knows it and the only one who wont admit it is you. your in denial and that's pisssing off your husband are you that heartless towards him that you would blame this on him I hope he does leave you because your hurting him and you don;t even care....
2006-08-19 01:50:07 · answer #9 · answered by 4stringthndr 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
your caught in the 'pleasing others' trap. get some self-esteem training and you'll have your self-respect and power back.
2006-08-19 01:44:38 · answer #10 · answered by jimrich 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋