My kids had to go stay with their dad tonight. I get a call from my daughter who is crying. Telling me she wanted to come home, because her dad and her were fighting since she got in the car. He later got in her face, screaming at her. My daughter was afraid of him, and she wanted me to come and pick her up. But the court order state he gets visitation every other weekend. He took me to court for contempt a few months back, because she was refusing to go with him, the judge did not find me in contempt. My Daughter is 14. To make a long story short I called the local police and had them check in on her. They gave her the option to leave and she kept saying "I don't no" So she is still there. What would you have done and where do I go from here. My EX husband is a real controlling person, and has a temper. I am afraid for my daughter. The reason she did not leave is because she was afraid it would make him more mad, and she doesn't want me in trouble with him.
2006-08-18 17:16:16 · 14 answers · asked by Right Wing Extremist 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sweetie I know someone who is going through the same thing. Most men think they should be in control. Most of the time the man doesn't even want the kids with them but they take them to control you. I understand you are afraid for your daughter.You need a attorney to protect you and your daughter. At her age she has choices to make whether or not she wants to go be with her dad or stay with you. I don't think she wants to be with him so your attorney can help you there. If you can't afford a attorney, Look for legal aid in the yellow pages. Good Luck- God be with you all.
2006-08-18 17:26:06 · answer #1 · answered by grandma_speedy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The judge will listen. You need to ask the husband what is going on and why the problem, even though you yourself may be afraid. It's possible she may be afraid, or it could be that she doesn't have the freedom she does when she's home with you. Unless you think he's violent, you probably did the right thing asking the cops to check the situation out, although a controlling abuser is usually a good liar about these situations they create. My advice would be to call him AFTER she comes home, or go ahead and get an appointment with the judge.
2006-08-18 17:27:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
even if there is a court order stating that he gets visitations and she refuses to go then she does not have to go and there is no contempt.
the best thing to do is if he comes to pick her up and she says no then tell him no and make sure you have the cops there so they can make out a civilian complain showing that she chose not to go so that it is documented, then if he takes you to court you can show the judge the complain and they will have to drop the contempt charge, at which point you can have the visitations modified in court since she doesn't want to be visiting him.
oops, sorry, i just gave too much of the battle plan away, sorry about that, please disregard most of what i said even if it sounds good
2006-08-18 17:34:58 · answer #3 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like a healthy environment for your daughter. I don't know much about divorces and court orders, but isn't there a lawyer or somebody you can consult and get some advice on this matter. I think that would be the best thing to do. Maybe you can get supervised visitations.
2006-08-18 17:25:30 · answer #4 · answered by Medina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The court order may state that he gets visitation every other weekend, but if you feel that your child's welfare or well being is in jeopardy, and she wants to come home, I would go get my child. If that is considered "contempt" I'd take my chances and explain to the Judge your concerns and that you feared for your child's safety with her father who has a bad temper. Are you prohibited from taking your child home from their father's if she doesn't want to stay there, regardless of it being his weekend?
2006-08-18 17:26:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would go back to court and tell the judge she is afraid of him , and possibly get an order against him not be around your daughter.
2006-08-18 17:21:52 · answer #6 · answered by bouchard54 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First thing I would have done would be to get my children out of their.the next step would be to try and get a child representative to talk to the children and see what they want to do.A child rep can go to court on behalf of the kids and most times what ever the kids want they get.If your ex is as bad as you say and no doubt he is from what I have read the courts would more than likely give him supervised access so he can be watched and they can make sure the children are not in any danger he would not be allowed near them on his own.
2006-08-18 17:24:03 · answer #7 · answered by flying_eagle_72 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay, well next time she should go with the police men anyways. Only because your ex isn't going to do anything with the police there, because then he would never see her again, or any of your kids. You should be scared of her, your a mom, you will always worried even if she is happy. It's in your sense, too. If you have to, the court, if you have proof of anything, will give a restraining order against him, and even give you securty if it is to bad.
2006-08-18 17:23:06 · answer #8 · answered by aim 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear that.I think you should let your daughter stay at home with you,and if he tries to take you to court then you should let your daughter tell the judge how she feels.They always listen to the children.Good Luck
2006-08-18 17:21:38 · answer #9 · answered by DiamondXxx 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In Ohio,at least, at the age of 14 a child has the option to go or not. I don't know about where you live,but,you should look into the age of decision in your area.
2006-08-18 17:25:18 · answer #10 · answered by throatp0ker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋