i've been on and off with a guy for 6 years, pretty much always on. i have really bad trust issues because in the first six months of our relationship he cheated on me. we were both still in high school and not serious yet but it really has affected my trust for him even 6 years later. i know i love him very much and when i'm not with him i feel incomplete. we share all of the same interests, and always are doing something fun. we are both in college but a few weeks ago he admitted to me that he had "made out" with a girl in his program a lot of times. i had suspected there had been something going on with them because i had seen them at school together and it looked more than friendly. he denied anything happening the whole time and told me things like i am a psycho or crazy for thinking he would do that to me. the girl was engaged at the time and is now married but he is going back to school in a week to be in classes with her again. it makes me really sad..what should i do?
2006-08-18 15:50:17 · 5 answers · asked by rochae84 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sometimes, lack of trust makes us see things in another perspective which is not the truth. Give your boyfriend the benefit of the doubt. When you opted to stay with him despite the fact that he cheated on you before, you should have given him back your trust for any relationship without trust is weak.
You just could have been paranoid by what he did to you and your lack of trust for him that you mistook their talking at school in a friendly manner for something else.
If your boyfriend doesn't love you, do you think he will keep your relationship going for six years? Your love has been built through the years, yes, it's true. But any man can easily get away with a relationship when he no longer cares for the woman. Even if a man cheats on his girl, the reason he does not separate ways with her (according to love psychologists) is because he still wants to continue his relationship with that girl.
Considering that you know that that girl is now married, the more you should not be affected by his going back to school where he could see her. If there was something going on between them before she got married, why then did she not choose him over her husband now. That alone could have been a big slap on your bf's face had he really liked her and that would make him realize how a fool he was to deceive you for that girl who obviously loved another more. This makes me believe that there was nothing between them before except friendship and in that aspect, let your bf be free to befriend other people because any love relationship should not curtail the freedom of the two persons in love to do what could make them better persons.
Right now, just continue loving him. Be a more loving and sweeter girlfriend than what you've been before and let him know you really care about him through words and deeds. Give him back your trust and let him know it. Surprise him with simple things without any occasion at all. Little things mean a lot holds true. And remember this revised maxim that I always have in my heart and mind: GIVE HIM THE BEST LOVE YOU COULD EVER GIVE, AND HIS BEST LOVE WILL COME BACK TO YOU but the original goes like this: GIVE TO THE WORLD THE BEST LOVE YOU COULD EVER GIVE, AND THE BEST LOVE WILL COME BACK TO YOU.
Smile for to love and be loved is wonderful. Good luck to your relatinship.
2006-08-18 16:47:15 · answer #1 · answered by Ruzzo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems as if no trust is there and if you dont have trust you dont have anything. You are only human and any woman would feel the same as you. If you know thats the man you want to be with then you just have to bare with it a while. He has admitted to making out before and I wouldnt want to go behind that if he has already done it once. You never know what to expect the second time around. Just be true to yourself. Remember this saying, never put your all into a person because when they're gone you're left with nothing. Good luck.
2006-08-18 16:06:12 · answer #2 · answered by hodgesandguy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a present should be something significant. how lengthy have you ever been courting this guy? once you've been mutually for a lengthy time period, you want to renowned him properly sufficient to %. something particular. imagine of something that he collects or something he enjoys doing and purchase something alongside those traces. for instance: if he likes to entice, purchase him paintings substances and a staggering leather-depending sure portfolio. per chance both of you may want to take a visit mutually, that should not be too extreme priced. solid success and function interesting!
2016-11-05 03:28:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to move on. there is no reson why you such stay with a cheated he will just keep doing the same thing over and over again.
2006-08-18 17:22:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are that was six years ago and nothing else has happen so let go and everytime you start to think that way .......don't....forget it.
2006-08-18 15:59:35 · answer #5 · answered by auntkarendjjb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋