im 14 and im 20 weeks pregnant and the father left after i told him and i havent told anybody yet help me plz!

Question

i havent told my mom or dad yet that im 20 weeks pregnant because i've been staying at my best friends house ever since i found out and i dont know what to do!!! and my boyfriend ( the father ) left right after i told him.. and im only 14v and i know that if i tell my mom and dad that they will frak out and they would probibly kill me!! so i really need help!!!

Answer 1

Roxxi,

First of all, please ignore any rude or insensitive answers given here. I’ll never understand why some people go out of their way to criticize or insult others who are obviously in need of help.

I’m assuming you haven’t been at your friends for twenty weeks, but just since you found out you are pregnant. You know your parents better than we do, but speaking as a mother myself, I can tell you honestly, Roxxi, if my daughter was in your circumstances, I’d want her to tell me! Yes, I probably would freak out at first, but that would only be my initial reaction. Then I’d want to help as much as possible. Most parents would feel the same way.

You shouldn’t have to go through this alone. So what if they are mad at you… they’re your parents and you NEED them now. There are difficult, major decisions for you to make which have lifelong consequences and you will need all the help and support your family and friends can give you.

Answer 2

You need to tell someone that you trust (someone older).

A baby, while you should not be having one at 14, is NOT the end of the world. How do you know that your parents would kill you? They might surprise you.

If not, you may want to seek out the assistance of a Catholic based unwed mother center. Believe it or not, they do still exist and they can help you out.

You should probably also consider the possibility of adoption. 14 is SO young. If you found the right family, they would provide for all of your medical care and shelter while you are expecting. Open adoptions are a real possibility (you could always have contact with your child).

You need medical care ASAP. You need to tell someone who can help you...perhaps your friend's parents? A grandparent? An Aunt? A teacher?

There are things you can do and places you can go. Don't give up. It's not the end of the world. A baby is a blessing and even though you are not old enough to care for it...there are lots of people out there who would love a baby.

Answer 3

I just had a child myself one month ago. The father was a huge a**. Although Im older and on my own I still told my parents and they did freak out. The only problem was that I didnt tell them util after the baby was born and I had already signed adoption papers. They freaked because I wasnt upfront and honest with them from the beginning. I could have saved them and myself alot of heartache and grief if I would have told them from the beginning. I realized that they could have given me the support that you need while you are going through a pregnancy. Your parents will love you no matter what. Its extremely hard to do on your own. The question that I have is, have you seen a doctor? Thats very important. Alot of times a doctor is the one that can help you with advice on how to live your life along with how to tell your parents or anyone else for that matter. Your boyfriend is obviously crap and your better off without him. If he was a good boyfriend he would be with you right now helping you through this hard time. If you have any more questions, get at me. Good luck and hang in there.

Answer 4

WOW. I am really sorry that it had 2 go down 4 u like this.It must b hard. 2 questions though:1.why haven't u seen ur parents 4 was it 5 months?and 2. Did u really think that guy u did was really worth the risk if u weren't going 2 use protection?I mean really, did u think he was going 2 support u if u got pregnant, esp. @ 14.that's really young 2 b having sex. Actually, that's really young 2 even b thinking about having sex.Sex is devotion not just 4 fun, @ least that's what I think. And guys aren't going 2 devote their lives 4 u @ 14. I mean ur just in 8th or 9th grade for heaven sakes. sorry 2 lecture u, and the only help I can give u is offer the baby 4 adobtion, 'cause 1 ur 2 young 2 b taking care of a ba-b at ur age,and 2 abortion is just cruel.It'll b hard at first, but then u'll have more time 2 enjoy bing young again b4 u do that again.u're only young once, and it's ot very long.(p.s. I'm only 16. If u wanna talk e-mail me @ bluebuddytlb@yahoo...ttys

Answer 5

Sweetie, tell your parents.....they may be the only people who will be there for you right now. I have an idea......get a copy of the ultrasound.....give it to your parents and they will figure out the rest. the sooner you let them know about this, the better you will feel. Regarding the father of the child, if he is gone, consider it so. Accept it now that he will not be in the picture for this. That way, less pressure. I know it may be hard but, it can work if you stay focused. Lastly, find someone, that you can go all the way through with this with. I hope this helps!

Answer 6

First of all tell your parents...they may surprise you. They may be hard on you at first but that is because they care about you. This is something that you can't hide forever even staying at a friends house...how would you explain a baby all of a sudden. Second get to a doctor you could be putting both you and your babies health at risk with no prenatal care. And last work out child support and visitation with the father and his family. It can be very difficult dealing with him at first but it will be best for the child in the long run if you two can get along.

Answer 7

Your parents can't kill you otherwise they'll go to jail for not one murder, but two because there is a 20 week old baby in your tummy. If your babies daddy wants to be this way, you make sure you get his butt with a nice child support check after your child is born. Until then, you need to tell your parents. Ask your friend to be there with you while you tell them so that you have someone to support you. Also, your parents cant harm you in anyway if your friends there witnessing this encounter. They will not hurt you, they may be dissapointed, but they're your parents and will love you no matter what. And, when their grandbaby is born they'll accept it even more seeing a gorgeous infant brought into this world.

Answer 8

Tell your parents now. If the BF is over 18 this rape. It is too late for an abortion and are you seeing a doctor? Put the baby up for adoption right away, you are way to young to care for and raise a child.

Go tell your parents NOW! You are in over your head and you need help from them. them will be mad for sure, but they love you and they care about you, now you must strong and face them no matter what happens. I am sorry you made such a big mistake, unfortunately your 50% responisible for letting this happen.

Best of luck.
And no more sex till your 18 or 21 - this is what happens and this is why parents don't want their young teenage daughter hanging out with low life, scumbag, dirt ball guys who only want to get their D**K wet with an innocent young girl like you - because now your pregnant and he is out telling his buddies how he screwed you and bragging about how he is such a big man and your going to have baby he does not give S**T. Lucky you, you get to have baby and he got laid.

Go to your parents now!

MJ

Answer 9

Welcome to the real world. I am sure that you never intended for this to happen but now you have to go forward and deal with the consequences. The best thing that you can do for yourself and the baby is to give it up for adoption.

You are not old enough to get a job that will pay enough for you to support you and the baby. You don't even have enough education to get anything more than a fast food job which will barely pay for the medical expenses and food and clothing for the child. Also, it is not fair to expect your parents to bear the burden of your infant in the household.

Adoption is your only option.

Answer 10

Tell your parents. After all, they ARE your parents. Either way, they care for you and nourised you until you're 14. You would need their help because at 14yrs. old, you can't get a job nowhere. Come home, sit your folks down, and talk to them. Try it, they might listen...but whatever you do, the dumbest thing is A. abortion or B. put the kid up for adoption....an orphan is really pitiful.....whatever you do, I believe that you'll make the right choices from now on..