I have been in an relationship for six years and I have been cheated on what should I do?

Question

We met at age 15 I didn't think it would last long but it has. We have two beautiful daughters and now I think he should wait while I have my fun because he's had his fun. He slept with two women throughout our relationship but I still took him back.I admit I was a spy but when you have a feeling about something u have to find out the truth. I spoke with both women and they described his sex just right it was horrible. We have been together six years and not once have sex been over five minutes. I don't know what to do I have tried everything. My friends say that I'm a good woman and they would have cheated a long time ago. I don't know what it feels like to be pleased in bed. Were only 21 and that's too young for a persons sex life to be boring. I still love him but not like I used to. I'm unhappy and I want to leave but I think about having to start all over and having men around my children. Now he wants to get married and I have coldfeet. Should I leave once a cheat always a cheat.

Answer 1

Leave him, leave him, leave him. Your body is a temple and you deserve to be treasured and feel pleasured. You will have to build up the strength to leave, but I say better to leave now then five more years from now. A clean break would be best, CLOSURE! I have been there and seen it. My Best firend is going through a divorce and she has 2 kids (young) and it is hard, but you have all the power to do anything you put your mind to! Best of luck, and I hope you have good friends for a support system. That is what it usually takes, you need to feel like you have somebody to back you up.

Answer 2

if you think he is cheating then yes you should leave, you need some trust in a relationship...just because you trust him doesn't mean you have to act like a fool when you know you are being lied to. I don't think that being unsatisfied in bed is a good reason to leave, especially since it's not only his fault but yours as well. Why should he be punished for something you are not exactly helping with either. You both should take a visit to a sex therapist. he needs to get a cream or something of the sort to make him last longer. if all this is a need for satisfaction in the sack then find your dream lover and go for it! Make him stay home with the children for a night...There are so many options, swingers, open relationships, cheating, leaving, staying, happy, unhappy...you will be the one who finally decides where your life is going and will end up. Good luck.

Answer 3

Your number priority at this stage are ur 2 beautiful daughters. They need to be brought up in a loving environment. If u and ur boyfriend have tension, ur daughters will pick up on this and the way they see ur bf treating u then that's how they'll grow up to believe how women should be treated. i too have always believed that once a cheat always a cheat. Have u and ur bf discussed y he cheated? i once spoke to a guy on the net who was straying from his wife and got him to open up and tell me y and suprisingly he did, but i guess he felt comfortable as i was on the other side of the world. I understood both their sides. but getting back to u, don't be afraid that if u break up with ur bf that u won't find anyone else. Life is full of surprises, u never know what is around the corner. If u r unhappy now with this relationship then look into ur future when u are much older and ask urself, will u be happy then? Everyone in life deserves to find true happiness. But unfortunately we have to cross some obstacles on our way and work out how to overcome them and learn from our experiences. Good Luck and I wish for u a much brighter and happy future for u and ur daughters.

Answer 4

If your unhappy then you should move on. You've lost your confidence in him by the sound of it and if you cant trust him it will never work out. If you brake up with him he will probly blame you for brakeing up the family but he should of though about his family before sleeping with other women, family should always come first. Im sure another man will make you happy one day and treat you how you should be treated. He will still come see your kids and he will still be their dad, but you should never be with a man because of your kids if your unhappy with him, they will soon understand it.I think its time for you to move on and have a new start with your daughters. If he cant value you like you should then its not worth it. If hes got you why does he need other woman your all he should need. Just tell him the truth and how you feel and that you want to move on without him and make a new start dont worry about economical reasons as a woman you legally have rights and he will have to give you money to look after your daughters. Look on the bright side theres lots more nice men out there and one could just be the perfect guy for you.

Good luck!!!

Answer 5

Let's see...let me put on my thinking cap....you can wait another year and celebrate another year ..more time wasted waiting for him to change his cheating ways...you don't have to justify why you decided to investigate your suspicions that your man , the father of your children was cheating on you. God, you owe it to yourself and your two children to try to find out what kind of diseases he may be exposing you to. If you can try counseling as a couple perhaps you have a chance . Don't think you can't afford it ----you can't not afford it. Look in the yellow pages call , phone consultations are free...many therapy centers and therapists offer their services on a sliding fee scale based on what you can afford. I think one of the worst things you can do is think that just because you're 21 years old and may have made some unwise choices that you have to suffer a life sentence . Many woman your age start over and become happy, independent single moms who are very successful. Get yourself some educated support. Check your local university or community college...women's groups often offer contact info so you can have support and they can point you in the right direction to build a happy life for yourself and your children with or without the cheater!

Answer 6

Loose the cad at once. And two wrongs never make a right, so stop thinking about giving your pussy to another man for now. Once a cheat, BORN a cheat. Don't put yourself into that category. Get rid of him. Make the best you can on your own and hope for a savior. You don't need the louse around. Unless he's got a lot of money, and I doubt he does. Move on.

Answer 7

Yeah well....this is a textbook example of why people shouldn't run around for years when you're young and have kids. Where does this "he had his fun and I wnat mine" come from? Seems very irresponsible on your part as well as his.
Now he wants to get married? You guys are precious. Twenty one, two kids and lives screwed up all the way around. As far as not knowing what it's like to be "pleased" in bed....baby...are you missing out. no kidding. But...those are the breaks aren't they. Hey...I'm 49 and i still lead a very active sex life. Yep. You sure are missing out. Sorry.

Answer 8

leave him, leave him, leave him, i cant stress that to you enough, you are too young to be with him and to have been through what you are going through. I was 14 when i got with my now husband and i have been with him 9 years and i am not as happy as i should be because i never experienced life....you have to see what else is out there and you have to "explore the waters" and if he's done it and he loves you then he should be man enough to step back and let you make your own decision. If you want to know what life is like outside of your relationship then you are always going to feel like that until you do one of two things, you will either cheat or you'll leave to find out... no question about it.... that feeling/want will never go away

Answer 9

well i have been cheated on twice too. and i left the guy. and then later i found out that he cheated on another girl that he was with. so i say once a cheater always a cheater. if i were you i would leave him. even though you love him and i know it would be hard to leave him. but i think it would be the best thing for you and your two kids.

Answer 10

Once a cheater always a cheater! I think you know the answer you just want confirmation that you are right. Don't get married if you have doubts. Especially when you have children. You are young and you will recover!
Good Luck!