it is a relationship?

Question

My bf is back from Holiday now, but there is a problem. My bf lives in sheffield UK, and i live in lincoln UK. It is hard for us now he is working from monday to friday and he is off saturdays and sundays but i am working saturdays and i cant see him on sundays becouse trains are hard to get he also dont have money.
I am just anly 17 years old ans he is 23 and if my parents will let me live with him will be good but they would i dont know what to do please help me!!!

Answer 1

If your parents won't let you go live with him...GOOD FOR THEM. You are 17,not an adult yet, and your wanting to go live with him proves it. Living with someone out of marriage is bad for that relationship. It doesn't lead to stronger marriages, when it leads to marriage at all.
Yes long distance relationships are hard, no question. And sometimes they don't make it. But those that do have a stronger bond because of the struggles. If this one does then you will have that bond and if it doesn't it will hurt for a bit and you will move on and find someone even more special. Yeah, I know you can't even imagine that right now. But it happened to me and can to you too.
At 17-19 I was so in love with my first love. But things happened and we ended up in different places. Three relationships later I met someone and was so glad I was free to be with him! He was everything my first love was and more. 20 years later he is still my best friend!

Answer 2

I too jumped into a relationship when I was 17. I went from my parents house to my husbands house. I got married to him when I was 18. I never realized that I had a mind of my own until I was 22, and I caught him cheating on me. Then I got to experience life, for myself. If was hard, but it was then that I realized that, 1.) you must love yourself before you can love another. 2.) You must be able to live alone, before you can live with someone else. 3.) You need to know who you are and what you want out of life, before you can be with someone else for the rest of your lives.
On the other hand,
My sister got married at a young age too. She is still married to the same man, 19 years later. She has 3 children, almost grown. But that is what made her happy.
I wouldn't do it, because I am remarried to a wonderful man. But I still have my independence, and I love him, but if something ever happens, I would be able to take care of myself.
You are young, you have time. My advise would be, get an education, live a lot, and then if you still feel the same way about the same guy you are with now, then go for it. But this is just my opinion.

Answer 3

you are 17, embrace that, it is an absolute wonderful age. it may seem hopeless, but i can promise you that when you are 23 you will want to be 17. Enjoy your age, do not tie yourself down to a boyfriend, You have your entire life to have a devoted relationship, have fun, live your life. He is really a good man, and cares deeply about u he will have the patience to wait till you establish you life and are able to live on your own. If you move in w/ someone so young you will not be able to discover who u are as a young and bright woman.
Also as a mother, I would never let my 17 yr old daughter move out, even if she was moving in w/ her boyfriend. the next 5 years of your life are full of self discovery, and moving out w/ boyfriend could stop you from life experiences you need to have.
I got married and moved in with my husband at 21. I went from my parents to him. I am happy, but I suffer because I did not have the life experiences by myself, to discover my unique individiuality. It is a struggle being older and having to understand who I am and discover that I have a mind of my own and I can accomplish so many things.
Think things through, take a step back and look at the entire picture, your future is yours do you really want to put your pre-adulthood hand into the life of a man. Discover yourself as a woman and your own self.

Answer 4

Honey just wait you only have one more year or less till your 18 then your parents don't have any say in it! What you need to do is ask him "Do you want to be with me?" If he says yes then he will wait. But if he studiers then drop him like a bad habit. You just really need to break him down and ask him for the truth. Because I know first hand how it is I'm only 19 and I've been married one year and my husband is 26. So if he really wants to be with you he will wait. I wish the best of luck to you two and hope everything turns out okay.

Answer 5

If you care for your parents and respect them, tell them of the
problem and take into account what they reply. If you feel there is
a chance of conciliation with your parents and your boyfriend,
ask them for advice. If their advice is not within your plans, try
to show them your true wishes and sense if there is any change
in their opinion. But please, do not go ahead on your own without
them knowing. This would be a lack of respect which will catch up
with you on the day of the first problem you might have with your
boyfriend. And problems will come, sooner or later, nobody is free
from future problems, even if, at first everything is bright and sunny. Whichever your choice, I wish you good luck and happiness.

Answer 6

I'm in the same vote...my weekends are thursdays and fridays, and my girl's weekends are sat and suns.....we really care about each other, so we make it work...it's just impossible for both of us to go anywhere cool together as far as going to the beach etc. therefore I'm getting a better job with a better schedule.....you might want to think about doing the same

Answer 7

Im going to tell you that life is too short to go without ive done it for so long. but life is a slow painful death you need to be honest with yourself and so does your bf. does he want you to live with him?, and are you ready for it?. because at such a young age you dont know what you/he will want in 2-3 yrs. and you my get a big kick in the *** by reality when you find yourself alone heartbroken back at home but i say love is worth anything.

Answer 8

take your time.
ask your parents if you can go for a trial period.

then if things aren't working out you can come back.

but don't rush into things.

I would discuss moving in with your boyfriend with him first, and think about it clearly after all you are the one who is going to be moving and leaving all friends and family.
If you still want to do it then sit down and discuss it with your parents and tell them that you would like to try it.

Good luck x x

Answer 9

sometimes distance is not a very important fact for a relation. but sometimes it does. u both should secrifice for each other. try to take a job at a same place, then u can meet regularly. but i think u should wait because still u r not enough matured for living together..

Answer 10

I would say tell you what your heart says ....but it doesnt always work that way so i say leave him you cant waste your life trying to work out somethin too complicated to handle i know people try and make things work out the best as they can but in this case it's too impossible.