have you ever thought about how it would be to be with someone else after being married a few years? Or do you think thats normal as long as you dont act on it????
2006-08-18 05:47:04 · 18 answers · asked by jenn03 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That doesn't mean that you are not happy in your marriage. There's nothing wrong with admiring beauty in a man or woman, just as long as your are thinking "wow he's really hot, but not as hot as my husband" and NOT "whoa I bet he would screw me just right" The reason you add but not as hot as your husband etc, is because it's a mental reminder that yes you can acknowledge beauty, but remind yourself that the person your are married to is The One. When my husband and I go out and I see him looking at a girl I'll ask him why he was looking and he's always honest with me, somtimes we will make a game out of it to see if we can tell if a girl has a thong on or somthing silly. We can do that with each other because we are secure in our relationship to know we truely only have "eyes" for eachother.
2006-08-18 06:27:03 · answer #1 · answered by spiffymo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all have fantasies. It's a normal part of life etc... We all have feelings that cannot be controlled. However if you dwell on those fantasies and feelings they can (and frequently do) manefest themselves into reality. You may not be planning to have an affair but you dwell on it and then someday when you least expect it you find yourself in a situation that makes you have to act. If you are constantly fantasizing about another then you might just be "swept off of your feet" and act on those fantasies. This is where the real danger lies.
Sometime we have to protect ourselves from ourselves. We have a capacity to do tremensous good...we also have the capacity to do tremendous bad. It;s like the story of the two wolves. An Indian boy asks his grandfather about good and evil. The grandfather tells the boy of two wolves...one evil and one good. The boy asks which one will be the strongest...and the grandfather says ....."the one you feed the most"
Stay away from "stinkin thinkin". A little is okay but too much will consume you.
Check out the following website. It's for guys but women can use it as well. It's about choosing your mate but also has information that you could use. It also gives you a "bird's eye" view of a guy's psyche.
http://www.condomsbrasandstraightjackets.com/
Good luck
2006-08-18 06:06:12 · answer #2 · answered by hoyhoydc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's normal. I have been married for 8 years and when I see a cute guy I think about it sometimes, it is just human nature to be curious it doesn't mean you are not happy. As long as you don't act out on it you are normal!!
2006-08-18 05:53:23 · answer #3 · answered by auzzimama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with fantasizing as long as you don't act on it. Be creative when you do it. You are having normal feelings. In no way does it mean that you are not happy in your marriage. Be creative and make up people that don't exist. I do that all the time. I create scenarios and then use them. It makes for some great sex. My husband and I talk about our fantasies together.
2006-08-18 06:01:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your husband if you and he can try swinging or if he ever thought of having a threesome with you and one of his friends but then you'd have to give him the same respect. Balance things out equally!
It is normal. Is you husband the only one you have ever been with?
No, it doesn't mean you are not happy it means you have an active imagination and a healthy sex life.
You can act on it as long as your husnband knows about it and wants to act on it with you.
You should be able to talk about anything and everything be open and honest even about sex especially to your husband or wife buy toys they are fun! Love unconditionally!
2006-08-18 06:00:11 · answer #5 · answered by sophia_of_light 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is perfectly normal and in my opinion necessary for a long and happy relationship. Sometimes we tend to get bored with our spouses for one reason or another. Just feeling the attraction to someone else if even for a few moments could remind you of what attracted you to your spouse in the first place.
2006-08-18 05:59:14 · answer #6 · answered by genetic_traitor 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it wrong to think about it.. no... I think it is normal and healthy to have fantasies. although acting on them is wrong.
Sex is something wonderful if done with someone you love. Sex with stranger is lust which is something complete different. The secret I would like to find is keeping the lust in the marriage!
2006-08-18 06:21:14 · answer #7 · answered by on2try 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal as long as it stays a curiosity. You can always imagine the other person when you are with your husband...that's call fantasy. Just don't turn your curiosity in to reality that's when the problems start.
2006-08-18 06:04:46 · answer #8 · answered by kitcat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im really not sure about this question its a hard one. I think if you are truely happy you should not consider what it would be like to do.
I think personally its wrong but it does happen to a lot of people
2006-08-18 05:56:20 · answer #9 · answered by marvalgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are crazy if you never think about it and a liar if you say you don't. You are a slu* if you act on it. Trust me, your husband thinks about sex with other women EVERY DAMN DAY. It does not, however, mean he doesn't love you or will ever cheat.
2006-08-18 06:28:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋