I'm going anyway, with court order in hand but I'm told I can't force him to come here. (he hates us because his dad & grandparents are lying & manipulative) I was beaten for several years & have the scars to prove it. But the idiot judge said a 15 yr old boy should be w/dad. Since his dad will be at work, & he'll be at his grandparents' they can't keep him from me. Can they?
2006-08-18 03:41:52 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I've seen my son for about 5 days TOTAL since May. He wants to stay there, AGAIN they offered him money to help out on the farm. There are 4 adults to run a "farm" with 22 cows & 1 horse, on 30 acres. They bribe & lie all the time!
2006-08-18 03:54:28 · update #1
I think I will ask in the legal section. Some aren't getting that they are breaking the law by denying me visitation.Thanks to those who read all of the questin.
2006-08-18 06:13:06 · update #2
I know someone who went through something similar to your case. His ex-wife brainwashed his son into thinking that he had done something horribly wrong. His son refused to see him for a very long time. Just recently the son had a revelation and left his mother's house to live with his dad. Give it time. Your child will eventually come around. I know it hurts but it's just something you need to do. Give him space.
2006-08-18 03:51:33 · answer #1 · answered by gemone523 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The art of Tai Chi martial arts says that when you pull, the other person will pull back. When you push, the other person will push back. The trick is to absorb and use your "opponents" energy and use it back on them.
However, firstly you must have a good stance yourself. A good posture. A good balance. And a good attitude. Compose and self assured.
Light attract light. There is light in everybody. At this moment everyone involve is filled with darkness. Backstabbing, lying and manipulative. Exchanging punches for punches. First you must get compose and fill yourself with light. Then you can attract the light out of your 15yr olds and the grandparents and whoeverelse is involve.
Hate to say this, but work on yourself first. Win by losing. Sacrifice the battles to win the WAR. Go away, compose, relax, rejuvenate. Even if you lose legally or dont have law on your side, NOTHING can stop love. NOTHING can stop light.
Dont aim for 5 weeks, Dont aim for 5 months. Aim for 5 years, 15 years, 50 years, that when you are long gone, your legacy lives on.
"If any man lacks wisdom, let him ask of the Lord who gives liberally " James. chapter 1 i think.
2006-08-18 04:04:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
There are some real good answers her, I think you were misrepresented! I think that if you can talk to a lawyer and tell him the situation. You might be able to get back your son. But your kid is of age to were the judge could ask him were he wants to be and if they brainwashed him in to thinking that he has got it better witht them then he could just say that he wants to stay with his dad! These situations are allways hard because you dont want to push to hard were you come off as the jerk but you also have your rghts and you can and should use them. "See you can Win the battle, but the war is far from over" I hope I was of help, You should also listen to some of the others post there realy good to
Adam
2006-08-18 04:02:12 · answer #3 · answered by Adam D. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your son that you miss him, but that you understand if he doesn't want to come over. let him know that your door is always open.
apologize if you were ugly to him or said anything ugly about his dad and his dad's family. Tell your son that you were just upset because he yelled and you and said that he didn't want to see you. (you shouldn't have been yelling at him- it isn't his fault if he's being manipulated.)
eventually, he will learn to think for himself. if you are a good mom, then just be a good mom. in time, he will realize the truth.
as far as the idiot judge, the dad, and the dad's family, don't let them get your blood pressure up. there's not much you can do about them- so why let it get under your skin? focus on your relationship with your child- that's the only important thing in this entire matter.
2006-08-18 03:54:17 · answer #4 · answered by miss advice 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What's the court order state? If you have joint custoday I would expect you can force him to stay at your place as he's a minor.
If you parents are manipulative have you thought about beating teh living Christ out of them in front of your son? That may make him want to come over. Nothing says loving like a beaten grandparent.
2006-08-18 03:50:11 · answer #5 · answered by stevenkray 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It will not be long before he is grown, so hang in there.
In the meantime let him know you care, somehow, someway.
Can you go back to the judge and complain or does the child have an advocate that can be convincing that there should be visits between you. ...And help you arrange a comfortable setting.
Have you thought of talking to a teacher, not in anger but in love. Maybe they can speak with your son to at least let him know you care.
2006-08-18 03:53:16 · answer #6 · answered by hello_ms_moore 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go there with your court order and a friend with a video camera. If the 15-yo refuses to go on his own, try to talk to him about it. If the grandparents interfere, back away. But, get it all on tape for your attorney.
2006-08-18 03:48:54 · answer #7 · answered by Otis F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They legally cannot keep your son from you. Go there and see if all of them have changed their minds. If his grandparents refuse to let you leave with him, call the police and show them the court order. Good Luck!!
2006-08-18 03:51:34 · answer #8 · answered by Michelle 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your son is 15 years old. He should be able to go where he wants. You need to take all your feelings out of this and look at it as if your 15.
I have a daughter from a first marriage and we saw each other bi-weekly. As she grew older she came to me and said she wanted to spend more time with her friends. I didn't like it but I understood why she wanted this. She was now a teenager and wanted to be with friends. I remember being a teenager and being with my parents was never my first choice.
You need to let your son grow and chose what he wants to do. If you go to court, which you can, forcing him to be with you. You just might ruin any chance to spending time with him when he is a adult. Are you willing to take that chance.
Talk to your son and explain to him that you understand he wants his time with his friends. Then tell him you would like to see him as much as possible when he has time.
Good luck
2006-08-18 03:58:58 · answer #9 · answered by Mit 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
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2016-10-02 06:05:18 · answer #10 · answered by covarrubia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋