2006-08-17 22:05:50 · 8 answers · asked by PC 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I had a love marriage with this guy who had affair with this other gal. After couple of years of marriage.. he confessed having an affair, and after some time came back to me for some reason. Now we have a baby.I am finding it difficult to trust him now as somehow I have started having fear of such similar behaviours in future also? I am finding it tough to forget this inspite of the fact that it happened couple of years back. Am I paranoid??
2006-08-17 22:10:24 · update #1
Find it in your heart to forgive him, and have mercy upon him. If he did not truly love you, he would not have come back, begging forgiveness. He might have screwed up, but at least give him the chance for him to show you that he's changed, and will fight whatever urges he might have.
Ask him to spend some time away from you, like at his parent's house, or his brother's house, or whomever, someone you know you can trust to keep an eye on him. Let him know that he can come back when you are ready to accept him, and that he has evidenced change. Tell him, that if he wants this marriage to work, then he will have to work hard at it. No flirting, no tempting situations, being sober, and so on.
Let him stew in his situation for a month or two. When the time is right, let him come back, and see just how happy he is to see you, and see just how much he's changed. Trust me... doing this will either make it, or break it. That first moment back, you'll know whether he has or hasn't changed... and if he hasn't, send him permanently packing.
2006-08-17 22:49:33 · answer #1 · answered by seraphim_pwns_u 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. i'm incredibly sorry to take heed to that. i could be devastated as nicely if my hubby have been to be cheating. before everything, how long have you ever been married? you comprehend, i might in all likelihood forgive my hubby, in spite of the incontrovertible fact that it would take a loooooong time for me to believe lower back. i might wish which you men could be prepared to circulate to counseling. now and lower back an outsider can look in and help. now and lower back human beings run to get issues that they are able to't get someplace else. have you ever 2 been struggling with? Has the intercourse been chilly? possibly you're no longer talking as plenty? those are issues which will nicely be worked out via sitting at the same time on my own and talking. (or with a counselor). discover out why he cheated and supply him and ultimatum.
2016-12-11 10:50:07 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Strongly suggest that you guys seek couples therapy .. trust is a huge part of a relationship and it will take time to regain but if you want the relationship to work you both need to heal from the past.
Hugs Mel
2006-08-17 22:33:41 · answer #3 · answered by jaredsmommy2004 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No--once a cheater--always a cheater. he's feeling scared that you will find out from someone and decided it was better for him to tell you and claim he's sorry. i wouldn't trust him either and you're not paranoid
2006-08-18 00:58:44 · answer #4 · answered by geminiblue26 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No...try to learn to forgive to free yourself from it but trust no...
2006-08-17 22:10:44 · answer #5 · answered by AK47 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no. if you can't trust him then, you can't trust him now, and you won't ever be able to trust him
2006-08-17 22:10:39 · answer #6 · answered by Kokoa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! NEVER! NOT EVER! NA A! YOK! HAYIR! NO NO NO!
2006-08-17 22:12:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hell no. DIVORCE
2006-08-17 22:12:33 · answer #8 · answered by MeLissa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋