Do my boyfriend still feel for his ex wife?

Question

He is divorced with 2 kids and shared custody, Ive never been married nor to I have kids. He gets mad if I say anything negative about her, saying thats the mother of his kids. I'm always so uncomfortable when they go to thier kids functions at school. It is hard for me.

Answer 1

Yes, it sounds as if he does have feelings for her.
If it bothers you now, have a heart to heart with him being fair and reasonable.
If it continues, if it gets worse, or if you, just plain out, can't handle it without getting P%##ED OFF.......RUN!
It will get no better with time..they will always be connected....even after she gets remarried, they will still have to have contact.
Life is too short to be angry all the time....Christmas, Birthdays, etc.....and you'll never have a summer off....she'll want to send them to your house, so she can enjoy her summer vacation. And she will guide them in how to behave at daddy's house.
I am sorry, but being the 2nd wife is a pain. It's a pain that if I'd known what kinda b.s. and all the financial hardships it causes on the 2nd marriage.
And the mother tries to control everything that goes on at your own house. She tries to cause a wedge between the kids and their dad and new wife.
We have been married 7 years. They were married 3 years. And that was 10 years ago. But they'll have a connection forever.
Again... Run Girl!!!! You'll always be 2nd. Plus, if your relationship is new and he gets mad, just imagine how mad he is going to be with you when the new luster has worn off???!!!

Answer 2

Have you ever found out why they got divorced in the first place? Maybe it was him who got dumped, so that's why he still seems to feel for her. Anyway, it doesn't really sound like he has any consideration for YOUR feelings. Ask yourself how far along you've gotten with this guy. If it's not too deep, then it's not worth the trouble. I would never settle for that kind of burden, because they will always have a connection through the kids and you can bet that there will be MANY more of those school functions ahead. Why don't you save yourself from a heartache if you're ahead of the game?

Answer 3

Well the ex wife and his kids are always going to be apart of his life...you have to learn to accept that or don't date him anymore. He probably doesn't want you talking negative about her because someday you might say something front of the kids and then what?...They have a connection...I think it's great he's like that...so many divorced ppl aren't..makes things harder on the kids..and dealing with the ex...

Answer 4

Yes, but not in the way you are thinking. He's with you honey, their marriage is over. The fact that he has a relationship with his ex, speaks volumes about what a caring and considerate person he is. You should be so lucky. I know you may not understand, but the love he shares with his ex, is only circled around the children they brought into this world. He sticks up for her out of respect for birthing those babies. Just keep reminding yourself that although he cares for her, he's in love with you. And if you are uncomfortable with the school functions, tag along...it'll strengthen your relationship if you take more of an interest in his children.

Answer 5

That is the mother of his kids, and he is right to defend her. He doesn't want her anymore, but it would be foolish of him to disregard his past. Face it, if you want to be with this guy you better get used to the "other woman" in his life. She's always going to be there. However, be glad he is able to have a mature relationship with her. Many couples can't do that after they break up, and it says a lot about him that he can.

Answer 6

Definitely yes. It doesn't mean that if they are separated it has changed the feeling they shared in the past years. Love never fades overnight. It takes years and it could even take forever for them to forget about what they've shared. Especially they have kids to still keep the tie (even loosely) together.

It's all up to you...

Answer 7

well if u cant handle it, then leave.. his children have to come first and unfortunately he has to do what is best for them and that means being civil with their mom.. and if u cant handle that, then ur to immature for this situation and ur better off leaving.. And as far as him defending her, its because u dont know the whole story or even who she really is.. ur the third wheel in this situation and he has enough on his plate with out an insecure gf trying to tell him how to handle "his " kids, "his" x wife.. its not about him having feelings for her, its about respecting the mother of his children.. and possibly if ur saying things when his children are around, then he'd want u to stop for their benefit, but more then likely because he doesnt need ur 2 cents in on how he handles his children and his x wife.. so either realize ur place in this situation, or move on.. plain and simple..

Answer 8

I can understand his having respect for her but he should also have respect for you and take u along to these school functions. Yes it sounds like that he may still have a little feelings for her to me (but maybe its just respect only because of the kids). You surely need to talk to him in depth about this and tell him that you feel like your coming in second place to his ex wife.

Answer 9

Truly it always is. Men are dominent in their places. He may feel by you talking about her that it in some weird way may reflect on him or his kids. You wouldnt talk about them would you? Try laying off the comments unless she starts something then I cant take up for her cuz she deserves what she gets. If he gets offended then and takes up for her instead of you then there is a problem

kandi

Answer 10

They will always have a bond with one another because of the kids. If I were you and you feel that strongly about it, get out of the relationship. I smell trouble. But then again it's up to you !