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Question

I discovered from my husband's computer that he has been emailing a woman from a printing company using his office email address and that he suggested lunch or something on his off day. I never knew him to spend time for me and take off work to do something or do anything for me. Although this email was 2 years ago, he has proven to be a cheater when he betrayed me and befriended single women on match.com. We have since try to work out this marriage. When I confronted him just now he told me that everthing with his work email is all work related and that he has nothing more to add. What is really worrying me is that he said that I might as well go "home" to my country by myself and he will be happy to send me to the airport. He purchased for us 2 tickets and we had plan a holiday in the Far East. Can someone let me know why he reacted the way he did. I am so deeply hurt and depress and I dont know what to do. I love him so dearly.

Answer 1

This E-mail could have been work realted but two things make me think thier not, 1. he acted as if he was guilty and 2. he has been know to cheat. so tell him that if he confess to you that you will work through it together but if he sits thier and acts like he didnt do anything or is lying tell him that, fine act that way but all things come to the light one day, if you dont tell me now then when i find out you will be sorry, remind him it's his last chance. if he tells you the whole story and dosnt act all weird then be happy if he dosnt or lies, wait and keep checkin him out. you know check his history on the computer, who hes been calling and if he is really cheating or betrayed you , you will see for yourself.

there is an old saying

"If a liar lied once he gonna lie agian", so if you think he is cheatin, you'll see

i hope this advice helped.

Answer 2

Girl, there's only so long you can be depressed-it takes up too much time. He's obviously trying to tell you that you can go home so he can have some private time to himself which could entail a lot of things. He's obviously missing something in the relationship and if you've done everything you could do as a wife and a woman, you need to wash your hands of it. Stop pressing the issue, hell go home without him and take that time to think. Scary to think of it but he may not be your match. You can love but you must love yourself first and foremost and if the situation is tearing you down that bad than you're obviously not loving yourself. Step back and re-evaluate, if he wants to be with you he wouldn't do half of the s$@# that he's doing now. If a man wants or loves a woman, he'll walk the straight line b/c when a man finds a wife he has found a good thing. Good luck!

Answer 3

Hard decisions are like sour medicines as faster you take them as better. Sweet heart you already lost one of the most important things to keep a marriage working out, CONFIDENCE, with out this is hard, may be impossible, to keep the flame of love alive. The best thing you can do is spend some time alone, so like this you can think with out his influence or his pushing, put everything on a mental planning table and work your problem part by part, then think in the things you or him have done for this to happen then what ever decision you make make it work fast. Remember is better to cross the Niagara Falls in one day even if you spend a week recovering because of the effort than keep your self in the shore thinking it and suffering for the rest of your life and filling miserable. A minute you waste in this relationship is a minute you'll never get back, don;t wait until is too late. Good luck, if you feel alone and you need some one to talk with do not hesitate in contact me.

Answer 4

I know how you feel. I know I will catch hell for this statement but all men are liars. Some are just worst than others. Practically all of them cheat. I see no point in leaving him or confronting him on something from long ago. It really hurts that someone could stand right there and just lie. If you leave him you may end up with someone worst. Give it another try but don't waste your whole life. You know if he really loves you or not. Does he. Be honest with yourself. Maybe he doesn't want to go to your country while there is so much going on in the world against Americans. Good luck to you

Answer 5

I'm going to be honest w/ you. Everyone is probably going to tell you that he sounds guilty. Well he does; however, he may not be. I know someone who used to look and sound guilty w/ every word he spoke and every look he gave yet he was purely inoccent. You need to get to the heart of the problem. Do you have trust issues and can this man be faithful in this marriage. I'll tell you like I've told so many others, luv comes and goes but true luv only comes around and stays. True luv NEVER dies. If this is what it is then it will work itself out. Pray about it (I dont know if your religious but if not then now's a good time to start being) God gives you what your heart desires as long as you dont put anything before him.

Kandi

Answer 6

I am so sorry for you...he has wronged you greatly, betrayed you, and has no conscience. Not all men are like this, but he has some serious problems that are not going to be worked out in the near future. He lies, he cheats, and he mistreats you. You do have other options, and you will get over him in time. If I were you, I would seriously consider what else you can do. If you are a citizen of the US, you have no problems here. Good luck to you, you are going to need it. This man is not a good one.

Answer 7

I've learned that people get defensive when they are guilty. I mean, an innocent person doesnt react that way. I'm sorry to tell you, but once a cheater, always a cheater. Hats off to you for trying to save your marriage, but he will continue to cheat. maybe you should take the trip without him, visit with your family, and re-evaluate his actions and reactions. BEST OF LUCK!!

Answer 8

He does not deserve your loyalty. Frankly, a hard punch in the nuts would be a good start. Painful as it is, I say get yourself out of this sorry excuse for a marriage and find someone loyal and mature. You're not doing yourself any favors by trying to "work things out" with this shallow putz. Be strong and true to your instinct, no matter what he says.

Answer 9

I think I would take his advise and go home to your country and leave him to think about all he has lost. If he truely loves you he will come for you. Sorry you are going through so much pain. you could see if counceling will help first. If not then find someone who is worthy of you and live a great life. It is to short to have to suffer that way. You deserve way more. Good luck honey. and God Bless. Hugs and Kisses. Hope that will cheer you up.

Answer 10

well i hate to say it but it seems like maybe your suspicions could be right there obviously is a problem somewhere if he said he would send you home by yourself and he doesnt want to go.it really sounds like hes not a very nice husband and maybe you need to talk to him about what he wants out of your marriage im sure it hurts and im sure you love him but do you want to spend your life being unhappy and not liveing your marriage to its fullest i believe that there is someone for everyone it took me thirty eight years to find the man of my dreams i was married to a man for 15 before him and so glad i left him with all his cheating and lieing he did to me.dont be stupid if u know its going on that stop it maybe seak counsling with him if he agrees to try and work things out good luck